I aways knew we were a fairly odd family.
First there was me.
太高 太瘦 太红毛
Too tall. Too skinny. Too orange.
My mum was lovely, but not like other mums.
There was something solid about her.
有点呆板 有点冷艳 总是忙忙碌碌
Something rectangular, busy and unsentimental.
Her fashion icon was the Queen.
Dad, well, he was more normal.
He always seemed to have time on his hands.
After giving up teaching
university students on his 50th birthday,
he was eternally available for a leisurely chat or
to let me win at table tennis.
And then there was Mum's brother, Uncle Desmond.
Always impeccably dressed. He spent the days just, well,
being Uncle Desmond.
He was the most charming
and least clever man you could ever meet.
His mind was on other things, though we never found out what.
And then, finally there was Catherine.
Katie. Kit Kat. My sister.
In a household of sensible jackets and haircuts there was this,
well, what can I call her, nature thing.
With her elfin eyes,
her purple T-shirts and her eternally bare feet,
she was then, and still is to me,
about the most wonderful thing in the world.
All in all, it was a pretty good childhood.
Full of repeated rhythms and patterns.
By the time I was 21,
we were still having tea on the beach every single day.
Skimming stones and eating sandwiches,
summer and winter, no matter what the weather.
And every Friday evening, a film,
no matter what the weather.
And then once a year, the dreaded New Year's Eve party.
Yeah, I might just get one.
You're absolutely gorgeous.
I'm Katie. What am I drinking?
This is very expensive stuff.
- Cheers. - Cheers.
Come on, it's nearly midnight.
We're all going through. We're going through.
Look, I've gotta find you a...
人紧张就会犯错 没事 快来
Everyone makes little mistakes. It's fine. Come on.
6 5 4 3 2 1
6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
Happy New Year!
Happy New Year.
And so I woke up the next morning,
hung-over, ashamed of myself,
and not realising it was the day
that would change my life forever.
Get up, stupid.
Dad wants you.
Hello. Sexy pyjamas.
Tim, come in.
That's very formal.
Well, um, yeah.
This is an odd moment for me
because I had the same moment with my father
when I'd just turned 21,
and after it, my life was never the same,
so I approach it pretty, um, nervously.
When you're ready. It's all very mysterious.
Tim, my dear son, the...
The simple fact is the men in this family
have always had the ability to...
This is going to sound strange, be prepared for strangeness.
Get ready for spooky time,
but there's this family secret.
And the secret is that the men in the family can
travel in time.
Well, more accurately, travel back in time.
We can't travel into the future.
This is such a weird joke.
It's seriously not a joke.
So you're saying that you and granddad, and his brothers
- could all travel back in time? - Absolutely.
- And you still do? - Absolutely.
Although it's not as dramatic as it sounds.
It's only in my own life.
I can only go to places where I actually was and can remember.
I can't kill Hitler or shag Helen of Troy,
If it's true, which it isn't.
Although it is.
Although it isn't, obviously.
-假设是真的 虽然其实是假的 -是真的
- But if it was, which it's not. - Which it is.
Which it isn't.
But if it was, how would I...
The "How" Is the easy bit, in fact.
You go into a dark place,
big cupboards are very useful generally.
Toilets, at a pinch.
Then you clench your fists like this.
Think of the moment you're going to
and you'll find yourself there.
After a bit of a stumble and a rumble and a tumble.
Is as good a reaction as any.
I think I plumped for "Fuck!" But it was the '70s.
No, this is so obviously a joke.
It's not a joke.
Why would I lie to someone I'm...
fairly fond of?
But, when I come back downstairs
after standing in a cupboard with my fists clenched,
you're gonna be in so much trouble.
Well, let's see, shall we?
And, Tim, try and do something interesting.
So much trouble.
I mean it. Really.
You all right, Tim?
没 很好 很清醒 很棒
Yes. Yeah. Good, ace. Yeah.
Good, come on.
It's nearly midnight and we've got to find...
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
10 9 8 7
10, 9, 8, 7,
6 5 4 3 2 1
6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.