Whoa, whoa, so I'm guessing you didn't get the part, or...uh, Italy called and said it was hungry.
Well, the part's mine if I want it.
Oh my God!
Yeah, if I'm willing to sleep with the casting lady.
Ten years I've been waiting for a break like this Chandler, ten years! I mean, Days of Our Lives. That's actually on television.
So, what're you gonna do?
Well, I guess I could sleep with her...I mean, how can I do that?
Well, I...I've got a popup book that told me everything I need to know.
I've never slept with someone for a part.
Well is she...
Is she goodlooking?
Yeah, she's totally good looking. I mean, if I met her in a bar or something, I'd be buying her breakfast. You know, after having slept with her.
You know, maybe this isn't such a big deal. You know, I mean, the way that I see it is you get a great job and you get to have sex.
You know, I mean, throw in a tree and a fat guy and you've got Christmas.
I just...I just don't think that I want it that way though, you know?
I mean, let's say I do make it, alright? I'm always gonna look back and wonder if it was because of my talent or because of. . you know, the Little General.
Didn't you used to call it the Little Major?
Yeah, but after Denise DeMarco, I had to promote it.
Can I get you something from the bar?
Yes, I would like something. No, no thank you.
If...if you wanna drink, it's OK with me, I've gotta get used to it.
No, no really. I. . I wouldn't feel right about it. Just some water.
So the light went out in my refrigerator...
I'd like a Scotch on the rocks with a twist. I'm sorry.
Hey, we're having some fun now, huh, Ross? Wanna do another one, huh Russ? OK...eleven letters, atomic element number 101...ends in ium.
Dysprosium? Try mendelevium.
And weenie number two has it. Unless, of course, ninedown, Knights in White Satin was sung by the Doody Blues.
Ok, you don't see it? You actually don't see it?
OK, honey, you're dating Ross.
No, Pheebs. I'm dating Russ.
Russ is Ross. Russ...Ross!
OK, no one is named Sleeve.
Phoebe, what the hell are you talking about? Other than their names being similar, I'm sorry, I do not see what you're seeing.
For your information, it's a card sharp, not a card shark.
You could not be more wrong. You could try...but you would not be successful.
OK, I'm gonna get some more coffee before the pinching and eyepoking begins.
I know what your problem is.
Oh you do, do you?
Umhum, you're jealous.
You're jealous because I'm a real doctor.
Hey, you're a doctor of gums. That's the smallest body part you can major in. It's like day one, floss. Day two, here's your diploma.
Hey, you listen.
No, no, let me finish.
No, let me finish.
No, you let me fin...
Ewww, ewww, ewww, ewww!
Did Joey say what he was gonna do when he left?
No, I don't even think he knew. Hey, would you sleep with somebody to get a great job?
I don't know. Who would I have to sleep with?
Why would I have to sleep with you?我♥ 干嘛得跟你上床？
It's my game. You want the job or not?
Where're you going?
Oh, Bobby and I are going away for the weekend, remember?
What's with all the bottles of liquor?
What's going on, is...uh, is Bobby drinking again?
Oh no no, this is not for him, this is for me. That way he's still sober but I find his stories about shoelaces much more amusing.
Oh God, even his knock is boring.
Hi. I'll be ready in just a second.
Uh, can I talk to you a minute?
This is really hard for me to say.
Oh God, you fell off the wagon.
Oh, no, no, it's about you.
What about me?
I think you may have a drinking problem.
What? These? Oh, these are, um, for. . cuts and scrapes.
Look, I am just not strong enough to be in a codependent relationship right now, OK?
Well, anyway, I hope we can be friends.
Ok, you too.
Well we...we kinda broke up.
Does anybody want these?
I'll take one. Sometimes I like to hold stuff like this and pretend I'm a giant.
How'd the callback go?
It was unbelievable! I walked in there and she was all over me.
So what'd you do?
Well, I couldn't do it. I told her I didn't wanna get the part that way.
Good for you. Whoa!
But wait, wait, wait. Then, after I left her office, she caught up with me at the elevator and offered me an even bigger part.
Soooooo...you are now looking at Dr. Drake Ramory, neurosurgeon, recurring in at least four episodes!
Alright...I've gotta go shower.
Hi. Oh, hey.
I guess you guys heard, Rachel dumped me.
Yeah, I'm sorry man.
Oh, all she said was that I remind her too much of somebody. You have any idea who she's talking about?
Oh I do, it's...it's Bob Saget. She hates him.
Hey. Hey, Julie!
Hey, how are you doing?
Um, oh, I don't know. I mean, it's definitely weird not being with Ross, but I guess I'm doing OK. Actually I've got some of his stuff that he, um....
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