There she is.
So this is where you work? Oh, it's wonderful! Is it a living room? Is it a restaurant? Who can tell? But I guess that's the fun.
Pretty much. Here, meet my friends.
Monica! You look gorgeous! Oh, my, the last time I saw you, it was eat or be eaten.
Uh, this is Joey, this is Phoebe, and this is Chandler, and you remember Ross.
Oh hello, Ross. Hi, Mrs. Green.
So, what do you think of my daughter in the apron with the big job?
Ok. If you didn't pour the coffee, no one would have anything to drink.
Believe me, sometimes that happens.
This is just so exciting. You know, I never worked. I went straight from my father's house to the sorority house to my husband's house. I am just so proud of you.
I know who it is you remind me of. Evelyn Dermer. 'Course that's before she got the lousy facelift. Now she looks like Soupy Sales.
Pheebs, who's Evelyn Dermer?
I don't know. Who's Soupy Sales?
Oh my God, there's an unattractive nude man playing the cello.
Yeah, well just be glad he's not playing a smaller instrument.
You have some life here, sweetie.
I know. And mom, I realize you and daddy were upset when I didn't marry Barry and get the big house in the suburbs with all the security and everything.
But, God this is just so much better for me, you know?
I do know. You didn't love Barry, honey. And I've never seen you this happy. I look at you and I think, oh, this is what I want.
Well, not just for you.
Well, what do you mean?
I'm uh, considering leaving your father.
All right. Tell me if this is too cute. Lesbian wedding, chicken breasts.
Oh God. I think I'm gonna be sick.
Why? It's not like I'm putting little nipples on them!
And you had no idea they weren't getting along?
They didn't fight a lot?
No! They didn't even talk to each other. God, how was I supposed to know they were having problems?
You know in my day, divorce was not an option.
Hey, look who's up.
Oh, I just can't believe this is happening.
I mean, when I was little, everybody's parents were getting divorced, you know? I just figured as a grownup I wouldn't have to worry about this.
Well is there any chance that you can look at this as flattering? I mean, she's doing it because she wants to be more like you.
Well, then, you know, couldn't she've just copied my haircut?
You know, it's funny when my parents got divorced, they sent me to this shrink, and she told me that all kids have a tendency to blame themselves.
But in your case it's actually kinda true.
Oh, that's him.
Damn. My mail order grandfather hasn't come yet.
Yes, hi, Mr. Adelman.
Nice to see you.
Hi, thanks for meeting me.
Oh, that's all right, although you did cut into my very busy day of sitting.
Um, do you wanna sit?
Oh, no no no, please, I spent most of midmorning trying to stand up. Now uh, what can I do for you, my dear?
Oh, ok. I don't know how to say this, but um, I think when your wife's spirit left her body, it um, kind of stuck around in me.
You're saying, my wife is in you?
Yeah. Ok, you don't have to believe me but um, can you think of any unfinished business she might have had, like any reason she'd be hanging around?
Well, I don't know what to tell you dear. The only thing I can think of is that she always used to say that before she died, she wanted to see everything.
Whoa, that's a lot of stuff.
Oh, wait, II remember, she also said she wanted to sleep with me one last time.
I'm sorry, there's laughing in my head.
Worth a shot, huh?
Look at this.
These are Halloween, three years ago.
Oh, look, here's Barry. Oh, did he have to come straight from the office?
No, that was his costume. See, he's actually an orthodontist, but he came as a regular dentist.
Um, you guys, remember when I said before, uh, "thank you, but I don't really need your help"?
Actually, what I think you said was, "don't touch that, and get the hell out of my kitchen."
Really? Weird. Anyway, see, I planned everything really well. I planned and I planned and I planned. It just turns out, I don't think I planned enough time to actually do it.
Hey, Mon, you want some help?
If you want.
Hey. Hey. Hey.
What a day. Oh, I took her everywhere. The Museum of Modern Art, Rockefeller Center, Statue of Liberty.
She's still with you?
Yes. I guess she hasn't seen everything yet. Oh, I'll be right back, she has to go to the bathroom again. Oh, such a pretty face.
Oh, this is so much fun, just the girls. You know what we should do? Does anybody have any marijuana?
All right, look, no one's smoking pot around all this food.
That's fine. I never did it. I just thought I might. So, what's new in sex?
Oh! What's new in sex?
Oh, the only man I've ever been with is your father.
I'm dicing, I'm dicing, I don't hear anything.
II mean, this is no offense to your dad, sweetie, but I was thinking there might be more.
Oh, I'm sorry. You know what? I cannot have this conversation with you.
All right, all right.
I mean, God, you just come in here, you drop this bomb on me, before you even tell Daddy. What? What do you want? Do you want my blessing?
You want me to talk you out of it? No.
Then what? What do you want?
Well I guess I figured of all people you would understand.
Why on earth would I understand this?
You didn't marry your Barry honey, but I married mine.
All right people, we're in trouble here. We've only got 12 hours and 36 minutes left. Move, move, move!
Monica, I feel like you should have German subtitles.
Joey, speed it up!
I'm sorry, it's the pigs. they're reluctant to get in the blankets!
Monica, how did this happen? I thought you had this all planned out.
Do you want me to cry? Is that what you want? Do you wanna see me cry?
Sir! No sir!