That was SO unfair. I know. Like you'd drink her coffee after what you did to her with Van Damme?
好过分哦。我知道啊！你跟尚格·云顿那样对她之后，还要喝她的咖啡？
Hey Joey, I have to cancel racquetball for tonight. That was Marcel's trainer. He′s gonna let me have him for a couple of hours.
乔伊，我要取消今晚的壁球。马修的训练师刚打来电话。他愿意让我跟马修单独相处几个小时。
You're blowing me off for a monkey? Hey, we can reschedule for Saturday. Yeah, unless you hook up with a bunch of pigeons.
你为了一只猴子失我的约？我们可以改星期六打呀。哼，除非你勾搭上了一群鸽子。
Hey! Stick a fork in me. I am done! Stick a fork what?
用叉子叉我，我熟了！用叉子什么？
Like when you're cooking a steak. Oh, okay, I don't eat meat.
像你煎牛排那样。哦，这样啊，我吃素的。
Oh then, how do you know vegetables are done? Well, you don't. You just, you eat them and you can tell.
那你怎么知道菜熟了呢？不知道啊。你吃的时候就知道了。
Okay, then eat me, I'm done! I've met the perfect woman. What?
好吧，那你吃我吧，我熟了。我遇见我的梦中情人了！什么？
Okay. We're sitting on her couch, we're fooling around and then suddenly she turns to me and says: "Did you ever want to do it in an elevator?" Oh my god!
我们坐她家沙发上，我们在亲热……突然她转过来对我说：“你有想过在电梯里做吗？” 我的神啊！
What did you say? I believe my exact words were @#%*&%...
那你怎么回她的？我相信我的回答是，@#%*&%……
I mean, I don't know what to say. How do you know if you wanna do that in an elevator? Oh, you just know.
我不知道要怎么回答。你怎么知道要不要在电梯里做啊？哦，你就是知道！
Oh, shoot! We gotta go. Got a reservation in 30 minutes. Oh, no no no,no no no no...You see? What I had planned shouldn't take more than two, three minutes, tops.
哦，糟糕！我们得走了。我们订的用餐时间在三十分钟之后。哦，等等，等等……我的计划最多绝对不会超过两三分钟的。
Two hundred seconds of passion! We gotta go. But um...here's an idea. Have you ever worn women's underwear?
两百秒钟的激♥情，我们得走了。但是，我有个主意。你有没有穿过女人的内♥裤呀？
Well, yes, actually. But um...they were my Aunt Edna's. And there were three of us in there.
嗯，事实上真的有穿过。但……那是我艾达姑妈的。且我们是三个人同时穿那一条。
Well, I was thinking it would be um...kind of sexy if...you wore mine tonight at dinner.
我在想，如果你今天去吃晚饭的时候穿我的内♥裤，会蛮性感的。
You want me to wear your panties? Could you?
你要我穿你的内♥裤？可以吗？
Well, if I was wearing your underwear, then um...what would you be wearing? You're swell!
如果我穿了你内♥裤，那……你穿什么？你忒棒了！
Oh, check it out. I made Marcel's favorite dish, banana cake...Wooo. With mealworm. Ahhh...
哦，快看。我做了马修最喜欢吃的香蕉蛋糕……哇哦！加了粉虫。啊啊啊！（惊吓加恶心）
Candle. Yeah! What do you think it's gonna happen here tonight?
蜡烛啊！是啊！你以为今天晚上这儿会有什么好事发生呀？
Oh hi, are you on your way over...Oh! No, no, no, I understand. I mean a monkey's gotta work. No, it's no big deal.
哦，你好，你们正要过来……哦！不会不会不会，我理解。我是说，猴子得工作嘛。没关系，这没什么大不了的。
It's not like I um...had anything special planned, you know. Yeah, okay. Okay, okay, bye!
又不是说……我计划了什么特别的。嗯，好的。好，好，再见！
Okay Rachel, why don't you start talking first? Alright. I feel that this is totally unjustified. She gave me the green light, I did nothing but...
好吧瑞秋，你先来说吧。好啊。我觉得她太无理取闹了。我先征得了她的同意，我又没做什么……
Do you think I can't see you in the TV set?
你以为我在电视上看不见你吗？
Alright Monica, if there's something you would like to share...You know, you had no right to go out with him!
好，莫妮卡，你有什么话要说就……你知道吗？你没有权利跟他约会！
That is...the most ridiculous...You sold me out!
这真是……最荒唐的……你出卖了我！
I did not sell you out! Yes, you did! You absolutely sold me...Would you let me talk!
我才没有出卖你呢！ 有，你就是出卖我了！你能不能让我把话讲完？
Did you just flick me? OK. Well, you wouldn't let me finish and I was just...Ow! That hurt!
你刚刚弹了我的头？你不让我把话说完，我只是想……嗷！好痛啊！
Quit flicking! Ow! You stop flicking! You flicked me first! Ow! Stop it! Ow!
别弹了！嗷！你别弹了！是你先弹我的！嗷！住手！嗷~
Oh! Right, OK! Let's not do this! Let's...Come on! Happy thoughts! Happy thoughts! Come on!
哦！好了！别这样嘛！我们……拜托！想些高兴的事儿！开心的事儿！拜托！
OK! Now I'm gonna kick some ass! Ow! Ow! Ow! All right. Now, I will let go, if you both stop.
好吧，我要开始教训人了！嗷嗷嗷……（疼痛）好吧。如果你俩都住手，我就放手。
What do you want? You want me to stop seeing him? Is that what you want? Aham!
你想怎样？你要我不再见他？这就是你想要的吗？对啊！
You want me to just call him up and tell him you're seeing him instead? Is that what you want? OK!
你要我给他打电话，告诉他你要替我去跟他约会吗？是这样吗？好呀！
Oh! That's what you want? Yes! Fine! Fine! There we go.
哦！那就是你想要的。对啊！好吧！好吧！这就对了嘛！
Ha! You know what? If we were in prison, you guys feel like my bitches.
哈！知道吗？我们要是在监狱里的话，你俩就像是我的女人。
Thanks for letting me tag along tonight, you guys. Forget about it.
注释：tag along：跟随，尾随。
谢谢你们带上我。客气啥。
How you doing there, squirmy? I'm hanging in. And a little out.
你感觉如何，扭动先生？我在坚持中。有些出来了。
So, assistant to the director? That's...an really exciting job. I mean, you must have a ton of cool responsibilities... I have nothing to do with the casting.
你是导演的助理？你的工作一定很有意思。我指的是，你一定有很多很酷的任务……我跟选角没有关系。
So what are you guys gonna eat?
你们大家想吃什么？
How come all I can think about is putting that ice in my mouth and...licking you...all over?
为什么我满脑子都想着把那冰块放进嘴里然后……舔遍你的……全身？
Because I went to an all-boys high school, and God is making up for it?
因为我上的高中是男校，现在神要补偿我了？
I want you right here...right now! Right now, right here? Don't you think we're in kind of a public place?
我现在就想要你，此时，此刻！此时此刻？你不认为这里是公共场所吗？
They do have the shrimp.
他们真的有虾。
Meet me in the bathroom. I'm going to the bathroom now!
我在洗手间等你。我现在要去趟洗手间！
Come on.
进来呀！
All right, mister. Let's see those panties. Alrighty.
好啦，先生。秀出你的内♥裤吧！遵命。
Whoa! Whoa! But you know what would be...even sexier? What? If you didn't have your shirt tucked into them. Oh!
哇！哇！你知道怎么样会更性感吗？怎么样？别把你的衬衫塞进去。哦！
All right. Now, I would like to see you wearing nothing but them. Take your clothes off.
好，现在呢，我想看你只穿内♥裤。把你的衣服脱下来。
OK! But um...I hope you realize this means we're gonna miss hearing about the specials.
好吧，但是你要知道，这样我们会错过关于特色菜的介绍。
Come on, hurry, hurry! Hey! Do you want this done quick or you want it done right?
快，速度，速度啊！喂！你是要我讲究速度还是质量？
All right, turn around. I wanna see you from behind. Okay!
好，转过去，我要看你的后面。好的。
Somebody's been doing his Buns of Steel video.
有人有跟着 “钢铁翘臀”录像在做运动哦。
So you want me to um...clench anything or...? Susie? Susie?
那你要我缩紧什么吗还是……？苏西？苏西？
This...is for the fourth grade. What do you mean? What do I mean? What do you mean what I mean?
这个，是为了报四年级的仇！啊？什么意思？我什么意思？什么“我什么意思”？
I mean...underpants, mister! That's what I mean! What? What do you mean?
我的意思是内♥裤啊，先生！那就是我的意思。什么？什么意思？
My skirt! you lifted. Kids laughing! I was Susie Underpants till I was 18!
我的裙子！你掀了起来。大家都笑了！我到十八岁还被叫作“内♥裤苏西”！
That was in the fourth grade! How could you still be upset about that?
那都是四年级的事了！你怎么到现在还耿耿于怀？
Well then, why don't you call me in 20 years and tell me if you're still upset about this.
那，你何不等二十年后打电话给我，告诉我你是不是还在生气。