Joey: Ok, and ah, this one here is a Douglas fir, now it's a little more money, but you get a nicer smell.
Guy: Looks good. I'll take it.
Phoebe: Wait, wait, wait, wait! No, no, you don't want that one. No, you can have this cool brown one.
Guy: It it it's almost dead!
Phoebe: Ok but that's why you have to buy it, so it can fulfill it's Christmas destiny, otherwise they're gonna throw it into the chipper. Tell him, Joey.
Joey: All right. Yeah, the ah, trees that don't fulfill their Christmas destiny are thrown in the chipper.
Guy: I I think I'm gonna look around a little bit more.
Joey: Pheebs, you gotta stop doing this, I working on commission here.
Monica: Hey, guys. I'm here to pick out my Christmas tree.
Phoebe: Well look no further, this one's yours! Ahhh.
Monica: Is this the one that I threw out last year?
Phoebe: All right you know what, never mind! Everybody wants to have a green one!
Sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get so emotional, I guess it's just, The holidays are just hard.
Monica: Oh honey, is that 'cause your mom died around Christmas?
Phoebe: Oh, I wasn't even thinking about that.
Ross: Hi there. How many ah, how many did you sell?
Girl: I'm not going to tell you! You're the bad man who broke Sarah's leg.
Ross: Hey now! That was an accident, ok?
Girl: You're a big scrud.
Ross: What's a scrud?
Girl: Why don't you look in the mirror, scrud.
Ross: I don't have too. I can just look at you.
Leader: All right girls, and man. Let's see your final tallies. Ohhhh, Debbie, 321 boxes of cookies, Very nice.
注释：tally：记录; 积分表; 账。
Ross: Not nice enough.
Leader: Charla, 278. Sorry, dear, but still good.
Ross: Good for a scrud.
Leader: Oh, yes Elizabeth. Ah, 871.
Ross: That's crap! Sister Brown Bird. Good going.
Leader: Who's next?
Ross: Hi there!
Leader: Hi. And batting for Sarah, Ross Geller, 872. Although, it looks like you bought an awful lot of cookies yourself.
Ross: Um, that is because my doctor says that I have a very serious...nougat...deficiency.
Chandler: Tell us what happened, Brown Bird Ross.
Ross: Well, I lost. Some little girl loaned her uniform to her nineteen year old sister, who went down to the U.S.S.Nimitz, and sold over 2,000 boxes.
Chandler: Hey! How'd the interview go?
Rachel: Oh, I blew it. I wouldn't've even hired me.
Ross: Oh, come here. Come here sweetie, listen, you're gonna go on like a thousand interviews before you get a job. That's not how that was supposed to come out.
Phoebe: This just is the worst Christmas ever.
Chandler: You know what, Rach, maybe you should just, you know stay here at the coffee house.
Rachel: I can't! It's too late! Terry already hired that girl over there. Look at her, she's even got waitress experience. Last night she was teaching everybody how to make napkins into swans.
Ross：That word was “swans.”
Chandler: Huh, seeing that drunk Santa wet himself, really perked up my Christmas.
注释：perk up:（使） 振奋; （使） 活跃; （使） 快活; 使更有趣; （使） 增加; （使） 上涨; （使） 增值。
Phoebe: Oh! Oh my God!
Joey and Monica: Merry Christmas! !
Phoebe: You saved them! You guys! Oh God, you're the best!
Chandler: It's like 'Night of the Living Dead Christmas Trees.'
Rachel: Hello? Yeah, this is she. Oh! You're kidding! You're kidding! Oh thank you! I love you!
Chandler: Sure, everybody loves a kidder.
Rachel: I got the job!
All: Oh! That's great! Hey! Nice!
Phoebe: Oh, God bless us, everyone.
Rachel: Here we go. Serving my last cup of coffee. There you go. Enjoy.
Chandler: Should I tell her I ordered tea?
Rachel: Um, excuse me, everyone. Ah, this is my last night working here, and I ah, just wanted to say that I made some really good friends here, and ah, it's just time to move on.
Ah, and no offence to everybody who ah, still works here, but you have no idea how good it feels to say that as of this moment I will never have to make coffee again.
Rachel's Boss: Now Mr. Kaplan Sr. likes his coffee strong, so you're gonna use two bags instead of one, see.
Now pay attention, 'cause this part's tricky, see some people use filters just once.
Ross: I'm, I'm sorry you didn't get to go to space camp, and I'm hoping that maybe somehow, this may help make up for it. Ok?
Presenting Sarah Tuttle's Private Very Special Space Camp! !
Sarah: Really Mr. Geller, you don't have to do this.
Ross: Oh come on! Here we go! Stand by for mission countdown!
Joey: Ten, ten...nine, nine, nine...eight, eight, eight...Ok, Blast off!
十，十 九，九，九 八，八，八 好，发射！
Chandler: I'm an alien. I'm an alien.
Ross: Oh no! An asteroid!