Chandler: I just walked in the bathroom saw Kathy naked! It was like torture!
Ross: You know if we ever go to war and you're captured, you're in for a big surprise.
Chandler: It just keeps getting worse and worse! You know? I mean it's bad enough that I'm in love with my roommates girlfriend.
Which by the way, I think she knows. Because every time we're in the same room together there's this weird like energy between us.
And call me crazy, but I think she likes me too. And now I have seen her naked.
I mean at least when I've seen her with clothes on, I could imagine her body was like covered in boils or something.
But there are no boils, she's smooth! smooth!
Phoebe: Wow! Could everyone totally see up his robe?
All: Yeah! Oh my God!
Casey: Here you go.
Joey: Great! All right, so I'll call you later.
Chandler: Hey-Hey-Hey! Who was that?
Joey: That would be Casey. We're going out tonight.
Chandler: Going out, huh? Wow! Wow! So, things didn't work out with Kathy, huh? Bummer.
Joey: No, things are fine with Kathy. I'm having a late dinner with her tonight, right after my early dinner with Casey.
Joey: Yeah-yeah. And the craziest thing is: I just ate a whole pizza myself!
Chandler: Wait! You're going out with Kathy!
Joey: Yeah. Why're you getting so upset?
Chandler: Well, I'm upset- for you. I mean, having sex with an endless line of beautiful women must be very unfulfilling for you.
Joey: What is the big deal? It's not like we're exclusive.
Chandler: Look, Joey, Kathy is clearly not fulfilling your emotional needs.
But Casey, I mean granted I just saw the back of her head, but I got this sense that she's-she's smart, and funny, and gets you.
Joey: You got all that from the back of her head?
Chandler: All right, look, I just think it's time for you to settle down. You know? Make a choice, pick a lane.
Joey: Who's Elaine?
Phoebe: "Little, tiny Tarzan, swinging on a nose hair. Swinging with the greatest of ease..."
Darn it! Now I don't know how to get to the next verse.
Ross: Oh, you could just go uh, "greatest of ease...BAH-bah-bha-bhannn." Then go right into it.
Phoebe: Yeah, ooh, I like that! Yeah. Wait! How do you know about 'bah-bah-bha-bhan?'
Ross: Well umm, you know, I used to play.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, that's right, the keyboards, huh?
Ross: Yeah, I mean, just a little in high school, but then I really got into it in college. I mean that's-that's when I really found my sound.
Monica: Oh God! Orange juice just came out of my nose, but it was totally worth it. My God, I completely forgot about your sound.
Monica: He used to lock himself in the basement for hours. No one was every allowed to hear, "The Sound."
Phoebe: I wanna hear "The Sound."
Ross: Really? No. I mean, no, I haven't played in so long, and-and, well it's-it's really personal stuff, you know?
Phoebe: Come on, play that funky music white boy.
Monica: Yeah, come on.
Ross: No, you guys, I mean, my keyboards are all the way uh- No, yeah, ok.
Rachel: So, who wants to get some dinner with me later? I really wanna try that new Italian restaurant.
Supposed to be really good. Saw a lot of Chinese people eating in there.
Monica: What're you talking about?
Rachel: Remember you said some restaurant must be really good because you saw all these Chinese people eating in there?
Monica: That's because it was a Chinese restaurant.
Rachel: Oh. Well, I still wanna go. Who wants to come?
Joey: Oh, I can't. I got two dinner dates tonight, so I gotta get ready.
Rachel: All right, girls' night out.
Monica: Oh sorry honey, but we gotta prep that catering thing we have tomorrow.
Rachel: Oh, that's right. I wish I was one of those people who could eat in restaurants alone.
Monica: You should try it. It's a really good thing to do.
Rachel: I just think I'd feel really self-conscious, you know? Like I was on display or something.
Phoebe: Nah, I was on display once. Nothing like eating alone.
Rachel: I just had a great time with myself.
Chandler: Well, this could be a good story.
Rachel: At dinner. It was so liberating! You know, I don't need people to have fun. I'm fun. I'm a fun girl!
Chandler: Are you a naughty girl? No, just fun. Fun. Good. Fun. Fun.
Monica: See, I told you you'd have fun.
Rachel: I know.
Chandler: Although I must say that I totally judge any woman I see eating alone.
Monica: Excuse me, what's wrong with a woman eating alone?
Chandler: Well, obviously something. She's-eating-alone.
Ross: Ok, guys.
Chandler: All right! Bring it on, you...
Ross: Here we go.
Ross: You know, I've-I've never played my stuff for anyone before, so it's important that-that you understand it's about communicating very private emotions.
Ross: You know, umm, you should-you should think of umm, my work as wordless sound poems.
Ross: That's what I'm...
Chandler: Oh my God! Play!
Monica: Boy, that was-that was, umm...terrific.
Chandler: Really, bitching!
Phoebe: Wow, it was so...wow!
Ross: Really? ! I mean, really?
Rachel: Yeah, I mean, you should play in public!
Ross: Wow! Thanks, you guys. That's uh- ohh, I wanna, I wanna play you another piece! Umm! Uh! Aw!
I left my uh, helicopter sounds on another disk. I'll be right back, Ok? Aw, this's, this's so nice, I mean, I'm- I am so...
Monica: Oh God bless my dad for soundproofing the basement!
Rachel: Oh, I can't believe I ever let him touch me with those fingers.
Phoebe: What're you guys talking about, I loved it! It was soo moving. Oh, plus it's just, it's so different from the stuff you usually hear.
Chandler: You mean, music?
Chandler: Yeah, I know what you're thinking! Yes, yes, your breasts are just as firm and juicy.
Chandler: Come in!
Kathy: Hey! Oh, God, is that Baywatch?
Chandler: Uh yes, but uh, I just watch it for the articles.
Kathy: So is Joey around?
Chandler: No-no, he's not back yet, but he'll gonna be here any minute. So uh, come on in. Have a seat. Bow or stern?
Kathy: I uh, don't really have a preference. You?
Chandler: I like it in the stern....of the boat. Hello.
Joey: Hey, it's me. Listen, Casey and I were on our way back and we had a little car trouble.
Chandler: What happened? .
Joey: We broke down on the Parkway, so I have to walk back and get some transmission fluid.
Anyway listen, could you please tell Kathy that I'm sorry and I'll be there as soon as I can?
Chandler: Why can't you tell her?
Joey:'Cause I only have one quarter, and I think my time is about to-
Chandler: Joey! Joey! !
Chandler: I thought your time ran out.
Joey: Me too, but I guess I do have a couple of more-
Chandler: Uhh, that was Joey. He's running a little late, and he says he's sorry.
Chandler: So, I guess it's just uh, you and me then.
Kathy: Oh, ok.
Chandler: Yeah, I think it is!
Kathy: So, what'd you do today?
Chandler: Oh, I had an appointment to get my hair cut...
Kathy: Oh, it looks great!
Chandler:...and then it got canceled.
Kathy: Well I can cut it.
Chandler: Really? ! Do you do that?
Kathy: Yeah, I do. Oh, of course, I learned at my aunt's dog grooming shop, but hey, what do you say?
Chandler: Dog grooming huh? Ok, just don't make my tail too poofy.
Kathy: You have really great hair.
Chandler: Well, thanks. I grow it myself. You know who also has great hair is Joey!
Kathy: Yes! Yeah! Joey has great hair! Umm, I'm basically done here. Let me just get this hair off your neck.
Chandler: Wh-what're you doing?
Kathy: Checking to see if it's even.
Kathy: Looks good.
Chandler: Oh It's the phone! The phone's making sounds! Hello!
Joey: Hey dude, it's me.
Chandler: Hey it's Joey!
Joey: Listen uh, I'm really sorry, but looks like we'll be stuck here for a while. I got the transmission fluid, went to put it in the car, transmission wasn't there!
Joey: Yeah, it must've fallen out a few blocks back. I just figured we hit a dog.
Joey: Listen uh, could you put Kathy on, I wanna apologize to her.
Chandler: Oh yeah man. Joey.
Kathy: Hey. Oh no it's fine, don't worry about it. Yeah-no, stop apologizing, it's ok. Yeah! I'll talk to you tomorrow. I should uh, probably go.
Chandler: Yeah. Yes! Yeah.
Kathy: I forgot my purse.
Kathy: Oh, I really did forget my purse.
Chandler: Oh no-no-no-no, it is bad, it's bad, it's bad!
Chandler: Wait the uh, the kiss or the situation?
Kathy: No-no-no, the kiss was good.
Kathy: No, but that's bad!
Chandler: Ooh! Yes! Ok! Here's what we do, we-we forget it happened.
Kathy: What? !
Chandler: Ok, we-we swallow our feelings. Even if it means we're unhappy forever. Sound good?
Kathy: Aw. Can you really do that?
Chandler: I have to; he-he's my best friend, and you're seeing him.
Kathy: Aw, Chandler, I like Joey a lot, but, with you...
Chandler: Oh-no-no-no! Don't! Don't! See? See, you're getting me confused, I'm starting to yearn.
Kathy: I'm sorry. If you wanna pretend that nothing happened, I can try.
Chandler: I-I think we have to.
Kathy: Ok. Bye.
Chandler: Are you still out there?
Ross: Electrifying. Infinite time-time-time...
Monica: You know, there's a Starbucks about three blocks down.
Phoebe: So inspired! Just look at him! Look at him go!
Ross: Thank you guys-guys-guys...
Monica: Hey, aren't you on next?
Phoebe: Oh no, I'm not playing tonight.
Rachel: Why not?
Phoebe: I can't follow Ross! Can't even you know be like those poor bicycle ridding chimps who had to follow the Beatles. No.
Monica: Phoebe, Ross sucks!
Rachel: Phoebe, the place has emptied because of him.
Phoebe: Oh my God, he's not even appreciated in his own time. I would give anything to not be appreciated in my own time!
Monica: Ok. Umm, Phoebe, you suck too.
Rachel: Yeah, Phoebe you're...awful!
Phoebe: You guys. Yeah, you suck too.
Joey: Aww man! I can't believe I locked myself out again!
Chandler: Hang on buddy!
Joey: Oh my God! What happened here? Did you do all this?
Chandler: I sure did.
Chandler: Well, I just thought it'd make me feel good to do something nice for my friend.
Joey: Well, you're amazing.
Chandler: Oh no-no-no. This is amazing.
Joey: A TV that appears from nowhere! That's the dream! Man, how did you afford all this stuff?
Chandler: Well, you know I'm 29. I mean who needs a savings account.
Joey: Oh, you are the best friend anyone has ever had.
Chandler: Oh, I don't know.
Joey: No-no-no, you are! You do this, you give me the great advice, and hey listen, I was thinking about what you said yesterday about focusing on one woman, I'm gonna do that.
Chandler: You mean with Casey.
Joey: No-no-no, I think I'm gonna see how things go with Kathy. She's pretty cool.
Chandler: Or Casey.
Joey: No, no, Kathy.
Chandler: Could be Casey.
Joey: No. No, Kathy.
Chandler: Consider Casey.
Joey: You know what I think? I think somebody's got a little crush on Casey. How about I fix you two up? What do you think?
Chandler: Than all the pieces of my life are falling right into place!
Phoebe: Hey! You were really great! You were really, really great!
Ross: Thanks, thanks. So Monica tells me that uh, you don't wanna play anymore because of me and you know my talent. Is that true?
Phoebe: Well, kinda. Yeah. Yeah.
Phoebe: Yeah, I- you know I was trying to be really you know ok and upbeat about it, but I just- I feel so dwarfed by your musical gift. I...
Ross: See but, Pheebs that-that is the exact opposite intent of my music.
You know my music is-is meant to inspire, and if it bothers you this much, then I...I won't play anymore.
Phoebe: Oh no. No-no-no, don't do that! How could I live with myself if I knew I was depriving the world of your music.
Ross: Yeah, ok.
Rachel: Well I'd love to, but I have plans on Sunday.
Guy: Well, maybe some other time.
Rachel: Sure. Just give me call; I'm in the book.
Guy: Ok. Thanks a lot. See you.
Monica: What are you doing? He is cute and he's a doctor.
Rachel: How do you know?
Monica: Honey, I eavesdrop because I care.
Rachel: Well, I have plans on Sunday.
Monica: With who?
Monica: Oh, God!
Rachel: What-what? You are the one who told me how important it is to spend time alone.
I can't just go out with that guy when I have plans with myself. Wouldn't be fair to me.
Monica: So basically you're saying you don't want to cheat on yourself?
Rachel: Well, if you wanna make me sound crazy.
Ross: Saw the new furniture. Very nice.
Monica: Yeah! Joey has the best boyfriend ever!
Chandler: I kissed Kathy.
Monica: Oh God, are you serious?
Phoebe: Does Joey know? ?
Chandler: No. Is there anyway, anyway you think he'll understand this?
Monica: You obviously haven't screwed over a lot of your friends. Which we all appreciate.
Ross: You know the-the sad thing is, if you had told him how you felt before you kissed her, knowing Joey, he probably just would've just stepped aside.
Chandler: Oh, don't say that! Don't say that. That's not true. Is it?
Phoebe: I think maybe, yeah.
Monica: He loves you.
Chandler: Then why didn't you tell me to do that? !!
Ross: I don't know- I-I said something to Phoebe.
Phoebe: Yeah! No, that's right. And I thought it was a really good idea.
Rachel: I know, remember that!
Monica: I remember you did.
Chandler: God! ! What am I gonna do? !
Rachel: Well, Chandler, you're gonna have to tell him.
Chandler: Why? ! Why do I have to tell him? !
Rachel: Because you do.
Chandler: Yeah, I know.
Ross: Ok, would it be ok if I wrote a song about this?
Rachel: I don't know if this is working out. I think...I think I wanna see other people.
Wow. Didn't see that one coming. It's not that I don't enjoy this. I do. I just wanna see what else is out there. Hey Guy.
Rachel: What're you doing here?
Guy: I work across the street.
Rachel: Oh, you know what? It turns out I'm gonna be free Sunday.
Guy: Ahh, you know? I wish you had called me. I-I just told 'em I'd work this weekend.
Rachel: Oh, ok. Well, maybe next weekend.
Guy: Definitely! I'll see ya.
Guy: Yeah, you'll be talking to me never, because you're a freak who eats alone.
Joey: Hey! Samboucha Margarita?
Chandler: Is that a real thing?
Joey: Well, we only had Samboucha, so, it is now.
Chandler: Listen ah, Joe, I-I need to, I need to talk to you about something.
Joey: What's up?
Chandler: It's-it's about Kathy. Umm, uh, I like her. I like her a lot actually.
Joey: You do?
Joey: Well, your timing couldn't be better. She's not my girlfriend anymore.
Joey: Yeah, she broke up with me.
Chandler: Oh uh, when?
Joey: Just now, after acting class. At first I thought she was doing some kinda scene, that's why I let people watch.
Chandler: Oh, man, I am so sorry. Are you, are you ok?
Joey: Well, I've been better, you know. But, I'm all right. So you like her, huh?
Chandler: Yes, but I-I uh, don't have to.
Joey: No-no, no-no it's uh, it's ok.
Joey: Yeah. You know why? 'Cause you came to me first.
Chandler: Well, I thought that would be the best thing to do.
Joey: But hey, listen just so you know, you might have your work cut out for you. Because when I talked to her, I kinda got the feeling that she's into some other guy. So...
注释：cut out for：适合于; 适合做某事; 准备。
Chandler: See uh, that's-that's actually what I wanted to talk to you about. I-I think I know who the other guy is.
Chandler: Oh. It's me. I'm the other guy.
Chandler: Yeah, I mean when you were late last night, Kathy and I got to talking, and one thing led to another and...
Joey: And what? ! Did you sleep with her? !
Chandler: No! No! No! I just kissed her.
Joey: What? !! That's even worse! !
Chandler: How is that worse? !
Joey: I don't know! But it's the same! !
Chandler: Look, I'm sorry! But there's nothing I can do, I think I'm in love with her!
Joey: Who cares? ! You went behind my back? I would never do that to you!
Chandler: You're right, I have no excuses! I was totally over the line.
Joey: Over the line? ! You-you're-you're so far past the line, that you-you can't even see the line! The line is a dot to you!
Chandler: Yes. Yes! Right! And I feel horrible. You have to believe me!
Joey: Oh my God. Is that why you bought all this stuff? !
Well you know what, I will not watch your TV, I will not listen to your stereo, and there's a cinnamon raisin loaf in the new bread maker that I'm not gonna eat! You know why? !
Chandler: Probably because...
Joey: Because it's all tainted with your betrayal. From now on this apartment is empty for me! And I'm not happy about you either.
Joey: Oh, and just so you know, I made that bread for you.
Phoebe: Oh my God, he's lost it. He's totally lost it.
Rachel: Phoebe, this's music that cannot get any worse. There are rats in the basement that are hanging themselves.
Ross: Thank you, thanks. Yeah, I lost it. You know, I'm not gonna play anymore, would you, can you finish my set?
Phoebe: After that? Yeah! No, I mean if I can help. Yeah!
Ross: Yeah, like I could lose it.
Ross: I played bad on purpose guys.
Monica: Ok, so you were trying to play bad this whole time.
Ross: Yeah-no, just that last song.