Phoebe: All right! You guys, it's starting to snow.
Phoebe: And look, Ugly Naked Guy is hanging candy canes.
Rachel: Where? Oh, well. That's festive.
Ross: Guys? There's a somebody I'd like you to meet.
Monica: W...wait. What is that?
Ross: 'That' would be Marcel. You wanna say hi?
Monica: No, no, I don't.
Rachel: Oh, he is precious! Where did you get him?
Ross: My friend Bethel rescued him from some lab.
Phoebe: That is so cruel! Why? Why would a parent name their child Bethel?
Chandler: Hey, that monkey's got a Ross on its ass!
Monica: Ross, is he gonna live with you, like, in your apartment?
Ross: Yeah. I mean, it's been kinda quiet since Carol left, so...
Monica: Why don't you just get a roommate?
Ross: Nah, I dunno...I think you reach a certain age, having a roommate is just kinda pathe....
Ross: sorry, that's, that's 'pathet', which is Sanskrit for 'really cool way to live'.
Phoebe: So you guys, I'm doing all new material tonight. I have twelve new songs about my mother's suicide, and one about a snowman.
Chandler: You might wanna open with the snowman.
All: Hey, Joey. Hey, buddy. Hey, Joe.
Monica: So, how'd it go?
Joey: Ahhhhhh, I didn't get the job.
Ross: How could you not get it? You were Santa last year.
Joey: I don't know. Some fat guy's sleeping with the store manager. He's not even jolly, it's all political.
Monica: So what are you gonna be?
Joey: Ah, I'm gonna be one of his helpers. It's just such a slap in the face, y'know?
Rachel: Hey, do you guys know what you're doing for New Year's?
All: Oh, no!
Rachel: Gee, what? ! What is wrong with New Year's?
Chandler: Nothing for you, you have Paolo. You don't have to face the horrible pressures of this holiday. Desperate scramble to find anything with lips just so you can have someone to kiss when the ball drops! ! Man, I'm talking loud!
Rachel: Well, for your information, Paolo is gonna be in Rome this New Year, so I'll be just as pathetic as the rest of you.
Phoebe: Yeah, you wish.
Chandler: I got an idea, dinner.
Ross: It's perfect, we will put it between lunch and breakfast.
Chandler: It's just that I'm sick of being a victim of this Dick Clark holiday. I say this year, no dates, we make a pact. Just the six of us...dinner.
All: Sure. I'll do that. Alright.
Chandler: Y'know, I was hoping for a little more enthusiasm.
All: Oh, Wooh!!
Rachel: Phoebe, you're on.
Phoebe: Oh, oh, good.
Rachel: Okay, hi. Ladies and gentlemen, back by popular demand, Miss Phoebe Buffay. Wooh!
Phoebe: Hi, thanks, hi. Um, I wanna start with a song that means a lot to me this time of year. I made a man with eyes of coal and a smile so bewitching. How was I supposed to know that my mom was dead in the kitchen? La lalala la la la la lalala la la. My mother's ashes. Even her eyelashes are resting in a little yellow jar. And sometimes when it's breezy...I feel a little sneezy. And now I...Excuse me, excuse me! Yeah, noisy boys! Is it something that you would like to share with the entire group?
Max: No. No, that's...that's okay.
Phoebe: Well, c'mon, if it's important enough to discuss while I'm playing, then I assume it's important enough for everyone else to hear!
Chandler: That guy's going home with a note!
David: Noth...I was...I was just saying to my...
Phoebe: Could you speak up please?
David: Sorry, I wa...I was just saying to my friend that I thought you were the most beautiful woman that I'd ever seen in...in my life. And then he said that...you said you thought Daryl Hannah was the most beautiful woman that he'd ever seen in his life. and I said yeah, I liked her in Splash, a lot, but not so much in...in Wall Street, I thought she had kind of hard quality. And while Daryl Hannah is beautiful in a conventional way. You are luminous with a kind of delicate grace. Then that's when you started yelling.
Phoebe: Okay, we're gonna take a short break.
Joey: Hey, that guy's going home with more than a note!
Ross: Come here, Marcel. Sit here.
Rachel: Pheebs, I can't believe he hasn't kissed you yet. I mean God, by my sixth date with Paolo, I mean he had already named both my breasts! Ooh, Did I just share too much?
Ross: Just a smidge.
Phoebe: David's like, y'know, a scientist Guy. He's very methodical.
Monica: I think it's romantic.
Phoebe: Me too! Oh! Did you ever see 'An Officer and a Gentleman'? Well, he's kinda like the guy I went to see that with. Except...he's smarter, and gentler, and sweeter... I just wanna be with him all the time. You know, day and night, and night and day, and special occasions.
注释：An Officer and A Gentleman：1982年美国电影《军官与绅士》，是军训爱情片的代表作之一，影片以海军航空员训练基地及其附近区域作为事件发生的环境，向观众们演绎了两队青年男女的情感变迁和不同结局。该片曾获第55届奥斯卡最佳男配角奖和最佳歌曲奖。
Chandler: Wait a minute, wait a minute, I see where this is going, you're gonna ask him to New Year's, aren't you. You're gonna break the pact. She's gonna break the pact.
Phoebe: No, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, could I just?
Chandler: Yeah, because I already asked Janice.
All: Oh! What? !
Ross: Come on, this was a pact! This was your pact!
Chandler: I snapped, okay? I couldn't handle the pressure and I snapped.
Monica: Yeah, but Janice? That...that was like the worst breakup in history.
Chandler: I'm not saying it was a good idea, I'm saying I snapped!
Joey: Hi. Hi, sorry I'm late.
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