Monica: Do you realize that four weeks from today we're getting married? Four weeks baby! Four weeks!
你有没有意识到4个礼拜之后，我们就结婚了？四个礼拜呀，宝贝。四个礼拜！
Chandler: Do you realize you get louder each week?
你知道每星期你都叫得更大声吗？
Monica: There's still so much to do. Have you written your vows yet?
还有好多事情要做！你的誓言写好了吗？
Chandler: I figured I'd buy those. Pat, I'd like to buy a vow.
我想我可以买。"派得，我要买婚誓"。
Monica: Sweetie, you know I have no sense of humor when it comes to the wedding.
亲爱的，要知道一说到婚礼的事，我是没有心情开玩笑的。
Chandler: Right. So, have you written yours yet?
好吧，你写好了吗？
Monica: No! But I know exactly what I'm going to say.
没有，不过我知道我该写什么。
Chandler: Do you happen to know what I'm going to say?
你有没有碰巧知道，我该写什么？
Monica: Let's just do it right now. Okay? It won't be hard. Just say what's in your heart.
你现在就做吧。没什么难的。只要把你的心里话说出来。
Chandler: Look at her go! She must love me more than I love her! What's wrong with me? Ooh, don't open that door.
看她写得多快！她一定爱我比我爱她更多！我有什么问题？别打开那扇回忆之门。
Chandler: Monica, there are no words! There are no words! This should not be this hard!
莫妮卡，没有什么话没有什么话！没有比这难的！
Joey: All right. Oh hey, you've done this before Ross, well what did you say when you made up your vows?
你之前写过这个，罗斯。你的誓言说了什么？
Ross: Well with Carol, I promised never to love another woman until the day I die. She made no such promise.
对卡罗尔，我答应她，直到我死不会再爱另一个女人。她却没这样答应我。
Chandler: I'm so pathetic! Monica knows what she wants to say! You should've seen her. Writing, writing, writing!
我真悲哀，莫妮卡就知道要讲什么。看她奋笔疾书的样子，不停地写呀写。
Phoebe and Rachel: Monica, what? What's the emergency?
莫妮卡，什么紧急大事？
Monica: You have to help me! I'm supposed to be writing my vows and all I have is this!
你们必须帮我写誓言。到现在我只有这些画！
Rachel: Well, I like the pretty little drawing of you in the wedding dress.
我喜欢你穿婚纱的卡通模样。
Monica: Thank you.
谢谢。
Phoebe: Yeah, except your breasts look kinda small.
除了你的胸部看起来有点小。
Monica: Those are my eyes! Those are my breasts.
那是我的眼睛！这才是我的胸部。
Phoebe: Oh! Yeah!
哦，不错。
Ross: Well, why don't you just start with something simple. Like Monica from the moment I met you, I knew I loved you.
为什么不从简单点的开始？“莫妮卡，我一遇到你就爱上了你。”
Chandler: Yeah, I'm not sure I can do that.
我做不到。
Ross: Everyone, this is Chandler.
各位，这位是钱德勒。
Fat Monica: Hi, I'm Ross's little sister.
你好，我是罗斯的妹妹。
Chandler: Okay.
好吧。
Rachel: Okay. Okay. Okay. Maybe you can start with, "Chandler, even though we were friends; there was a part of me that always knew I wanted more."
好，你可以这样开头，“钱德勒 即使在我们还是朋友的时候，我都一直知道自己想跟你更进一步。”
Chandler: All right, there's a nuclear holocaust, I'm the last man on Earth. Would you go out with me?
好吧，经过一场核武器战争。我是地球上最后一个男人。你会和我约会吗？
Monica: Yeah.
好吧。
Monica: Ooh, are we allowed to lie in the vows? !
婚誓里可以说谎吗？！
Phoebe: Well maybe you don't talk about your feelings back then. Maybe you just say something about you know all the things that he's taught you. Like…
你可以不谈自己以前的感受。你可以谈谈他教会你的事情，像是……
Phoebe: …or all the things you taught him.
或是你教会他的事。
Monica: Now everybody knows the basic erogenous zones. You got one, two three, four! , five, six, and seven!
谁都知道敏感区有1，2，3…4，5，6，还有7个。
Chandler: There are seven? ! That's one?
有7个？那个也是？
Monica: Kind of an important one!
恐怕是非常重要的。
Chandler: Oh, you know, you know what, I was looking at it upside down.
我是倒着看的，没认出来。
Rachel: Well, you know, sometimes that helps.
要知道，有时候那里很管用。
Monica: All right. Umm, you could uh start out with a little 1, a 2, a 1-2-3,3,5, a 4, a 3-2,2, a 2-4-6,2-4-6,4,2,2,4-7,5-7,6-7,7…7…7…7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7…!
好的，我们从1号位置开始……2号，1-2-3号……3号，再来个5号……4号，3号再到2号……2号，4，5，6号。4，5，6号，4号，2号……2号，4号到7号位置……5号到7号，6号到7号……7号，7号……7号，7号，7号，……7号！
Joey: Oh, I got it! How about saying something like, "Monica…
我知道了！这样如何，“莫妮卡……
Chandler: Monica.
莫妮卡。
Joey: "…when I look back over our time together…"
“……回顾我们在一起的时光……”
Chandler: Yeah?
然后？
Joey: I can't do everything! Look back over your time together.
剩下你自己来想啊！回顾我们在一起的时光。
Phoebe: Oh, look, twins. Hi, guys. Oh, cute, cute.
哦，瞧双胞胎！
Monica: No fair. I don't even have one. How come they get two?
真不公平！我还一个没有，他们怎么能有两个？
Chandler: You'll get one.
你会有一个孩子的。
Monica: Oh yeah? When?
是吗，什么时候？
Chandler: All right. I'll tell you what. When we're 40, if neither one of us are married, what do you say you and I get together and have one?
这样吧。我们四十岁的时候，如果都还没结婚，我们俩来生一个如何？
Monica: Why won't I be married when I'm 40?
为什么我要到四十才结婚？
Chandler: Oh, no, no. I just meant hypothetically.
那好，假设一下，
Monica: Ok, hypothetically, why won't I be married when I'm 40?
即使是假设，为什么我要到四十才结婚？
Chandler: No, no, no.
不是的，不是的。
Monica: What is it? Is there something fundamentally unmarriable about me?
是什么问题？我不适合结婚吗？
Monica: Well?
怎么啦？
Chandler: Dear God! This parachute is a knapsack!
老天，我的降落伞只是个背包！
Ross: I'm getting married today! Ahh, whoo-hoo!
我今天就要结婚啦！
Monica: Do you think he knew I was here? !
你认为他知道我在这里吗？！
Chandler: Nice try.
干得不错。
Monica: Wait, wait, wait!
等等，等等，等等！
Chandler: Look, Monica…
瞧，莫妮卡……
Chandler: This is not going to work.
没有用的。
Monica: I bet this will work!
这样就有用了！
Chandler: You are so great! I love you!
你真是太棒了！我爱你！
Monica: What?
什么？
Chandler: Nothing! I said, I said "You're so great" and then I just, I just stopped talking!
没事！我说你太棒了，就再没说什么了。
Monica: You said you loved me! I can't believe this!
你说你爱我！真不敢相信！
Chandler: No I didn't!
我没说！
Monica: Yes, you did!
你说了！
Chandler: No I didn't!
我没说！
Monica: You love me!
你爱我！
Chandler: No I don't! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!
不，我没有！停下来！停下来！
Chandler: You know I was thinking, what if I unpack here?
知道吗？我在考虑，如果我在这里拆包怎么样？
Monica: Then all your stuff would be here.
那你的东西就都在这边了。
Chandler: Well, what if all my stuff was here?
那么，如果都在这边又怎样？
Monica: Then you'd be going back and forth all the time, I mean it doesn't make any sense.
那你就会一直来来往往的。没什么意义。
Chandler: Okay. What if we lived together and you understand what I'm saying?
好吧。如果我们住在一起，你就明白我的意思了吗？
Monica: You wanted it to be a surprise.
你希望这是个惊喜。
Chandler: Oh my God.
我的天呀！
Monica: Chandler in all my life I never thought I would be so lucky as to fall in love with my best...My best...There's a reason why girls don't do this!
钱德勒，我这一生，从没想过会如此幸运，能爱上我最好的……我最好的……女生不求婚是有原因的！
Chandler: Okay! Okay! Okay! I'll do it! Oh God, I thought…
好！好！好！我来！天啊！我以为……
Chandler: Wait a minute, I can do this. I thought that it mattered what I said or where I said it. Then I realized the only thing that matters is that you. you make me happier than I ever thought I could be.
等等，我做得到。我以为，我说什么内容，在哪里求婚很重要。但我发现唯一重要的是你，和你在一起的日子我感受到前所未有的幸福。
Chandler: And if you'll let me, I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel the same way.
如果你愿意，我要用这一生的时间，来给你同样的幸福感受。
Chandler: Monica, will you marry me?
莫妮卡，你愿意嫁给我吗？
Monica: Yes.
我愿意。
Joey: Can we come it yet? ! We're dying out here!
我们可以进来了吗？！我们要急死了！
Monica: Come in! Come in! We're engaged!
进来！进来！我们订婚了！
All: Yes!
太棒了！
Rachel: Hey, what have you guys been up to?
你们干吗去了？
Ross: Oh, we were helping Chandler write his vows, but he kicked us out because Joey kept making inappropriate suggestions.
帮钱德勒写他的婚誓，但被他踢出来了，因为乔伊一直提不恰当的建议。
Joey: How is "Monica, I love your sweet ass," inappropriate?
像是"莫妮卡，我爱你的美臀"有什么不恰当？
Ross: How's Monica coming along with her vows?
莫妮卡写得怎么样？
Phoebe: Let's just say its she's lucky she has a sweet ass, because she's not so good at the writing.
这样说吧，幸好她还有美臀，因为她不太擅长写这个。
Ross: I can't believe in four weeks they're gonna be married!
真不敢相信，再过四个星期，他们就要结婚了！
Phoebe: Well let's just hope it works. You know nine out of ten marriages end in divorce?
希望他们的婚姻美满。九成的婚姻以离婚告终。
Ross: Phoebe that's not true.
菲比，没有的事。
Phoebe: Yeah, you're right. How's the Mrs. ?
你是对的。你的妻子怎么样？
Rachel: I can't believe they've been together for three years.
真不能相信，他们在一起三年了。
Joey: Has it been that long? !
那么久了吗？！
Ross: Believe me, it seems like less because they hid it from us for so long.
感觉没那么久，因为他们瞒了我们很久。
Joey: Hey, it's me! I'm coming in!
嘿，是我。我进来了。
Chandler: I've had a very long, hard day.
我今天辛苦了一整天。
Joey: Ahh, I'm gonna go get some chicken. Want some?
我要去买炸鸡，你要不要？
Chandler: Ahh, no thanks. No chicken, bye-bye then.
不用，谢了，不要炸鸡，再见。
Chandler: Are you okay? I'm so sorry. He wouldn't leave. He kept asking if I wanted chicken.
你还好吧？真对不起，他一直不离开。老是问我想不想要写鸡肉。
Monica: Chicken? I could eat some chicken.
炸鸡？我可以吃点炸鸡。
Chandler: Hey Joe!
乔伊！
Chandler: Yeah, Can I get a three-piece, some coleslaw and some beans and a Coke? Diet Coke.
能给我带三块鸡，沙拉，豆子，还有可乐吗？健怡可乐。
Rachel: I don't know why they didn't just tell us.
我不知道他们为什么不告诉我们。
Joey: I know! I mean it's not like we weren't cool about it.
就是呀，好像我们会很不淡定似的。
Joey: You? ! And you? !
你？和你？！
Monica: Yes, but you cannot tell anyone! No one knows!
你不能说出去！还没人知道！
Joey: How? ! When? !
怎么发生的？！何时发生的？！
Chandler: It happened in London.
在伦敦发生的。
Joey: In London? !
在伦敦？
Chandler: The reason we didn't tell anyone was because we didn't want to make a big deal out of it.
我们没告诉任何人，因为我们不希望把事情搞大。
Joey: But it is a big deal! I have to tell someone!
可这是件大事呀！我得告诉其他人！
Chandler: No-no-no-no-no! You can't!
不行，不行！你不能这样！
Monica: Please? Please? ! We just don't want to deal with telling everyone, okay? Just promise you won't tell.
求你了！求你了！我们还不想告诉他们，好吗？所以请你保证不要说出去呀。
Joey: All right!
好吧！
Monica: I can't wait to be with you! I'll just tell Rachel I'm gonna be doing laundry for a couple of hours.
我等不及和你在一起了。我告诉瑞秋我要去洗几个小时衣服。
Chandler: Laundry. Huh. Is that my new nickname? !
洗衣服？那是我的新昵称吗？
Monica: You know what your nickname is, Mr. Big...
你知道你的昵称是什么，大先生……
Phoebe: Oh, look! There's Monica and Chandler! Hey! Hey, you guys! Hey! Ohh! Ohh! Ahh-ahhh!
瞧，莫妮卡和钱德勒在那边！嘿！你们好呀！嘿！
Phoebe: Ahhh! Chandler and Monica! Chandler and Monica!
莫妮卡和钱德勒！莫妮卡和钱德勒！
Rachel: Oh my God!
我的天啊！
Phoebe: CHANDLER AND MONICA!
钱德勒和莫妮卡！
Rachel: OH MY GOD!
我的天啊！
Phoebe: OH! MY EYES! MY EYES!
噢，我的眼睛！我的眼睛！
Rachel: Phoebe! Phoebe! It's okay! It's okay!
菲比！菲比！没事的！没事的！
Phoebe: No! They're doing it!
才不是呢！他们正在做呢！
Rachel: I know! I know! I know!
我知道！我知道！我知道！
Phoebe: You know?
你知道？
Rachel: Yes, I know! And Joey knows! But Ross doesn't know so you have to stop screaming!
对，我知道！乔伊也知道！但罗斯不知道，你不能再喊了！
Ross: What's going on?
出什么事了？
Phoebe and Rachel: Ohhh!
噢，嗨！
Ross: What? ! What? !
怎么啦？怎么啦？
Rachel: Nothing! Oh God, we're just so excited that you want to get this apartment!
没什么！天啊，我们好兴奋你可能会搬过来！
Ross: Actually, it looks really good.
事实上，它看起来不错。
Phoebe: Get in here! Come on!
过来啊！快点！
Phoebe: Okay, so now they know that you know and they don't know that Rachel knows?
他们知道你知道，但他们不知道瑞秋知道？
Joey: Yes, but you know what? It doesn't matter who knows what. Now, enough of us know that we can just tell them that we know! Then all the lying and the secrets would finally be over!
对，但你知道吗？谁知道什么并不重要。现在有足够的人知道了，就可以告诉他们我们知道了。谎言和秘密终于可以终结了！
Phoebe: Or, we could not tell them we know and have a little fun of our own.
或者我们不要告诉他们我们知道，我们可以找点小乐子。
Rachel: All right honey, we'd better go if we wanna catch that movie.
好，亲爱的，我们最好赶紧走，要不赶不上电影了。
Monica: Bye!
再见！
All: Bye!
再见！
Phoebe: Bye Chandler! I miss you already.
再见，钱德勒！我已经开始想你了。
Chandler: Okay, did you see that? ! With the inappropriate and the pinching!
你看到了吗？她很不正经地捏了我一下！
Monica: Actually, I did!
我看到了！
Chandler: Okay, so now do you believe that she's attracted to me?
你现在相信她喜欢上我了吧？
Monica: Ohhh, oh my God! Oh my God! She knows about us!
天啊！天啊！她知道我们的事了！
Chandler: Phoebe knows about us!
菲比知道我们的事！
Joey: Well I didn't tell them!
我没告诉她们！
Monica: Them? ! Who's them?
她们？！她们是谁？
Joey: Uhhh, Phoebe and Joey.
菲比和乔伊。
Monica: Joey!
乔伊！
Joey: And Rachel. I would've told you but they made me promise not to tell!
还有瑞秋。我本来要告诉你们的，可是她们要我答应不说。
Monica: Oh man, they think they are so slick messing with us! But see they don't know that we know that they know! So…
她们以为他们很厉害 竟然玩我们，可是他们不知道我们已经知道他们知道。所以……
Chandler: Ahh yes, the messers become the messies!
对，整人的变成被整的！
Phoebe: Oh, my God, he wants me to come over and feel his bicep and more!
天啊，他要我过去摸他的二头肌什么的！
Rachel: Are you kidding? !
你开什么玩笑？！
Rachel: I can not believe he would do that to Mon…Whoa!
真不敢相信他会对莫妮卡这样……哇！
Rachel: Joey, do they know that we know?
乔伊，他们知道我们知道了吗？
Joey: No.
不知道。
Rachel: Joey!
乔伊！
Joey: They know you know.
他们知道你们知道了。
Rachel: Ugh, I knew it! Oh I cannot believe those two!
我就知道！这两个人太过分了！
Phoebe: God, they thought they can mess with us! They're trying to mess with us? ! They don't know that we know they know we know! Joey, you can't say anything!
他们以为可以耍我们！他们想要耍我们？！他们不知道我们知道他们知道我们知道！乔伊，你什么也不能说！
Joey: Couldn't even if I wanted too.
即使我想说，也不知道要怎么说。
Chandler: Listen, this is totally getting out of hand! Okay? She wants me to put lotion on her!
局面完全失控了，她要我替她抹乳液！
Monica: She's bluffing!
她那是虚张声势！
Chandler: Look, she's not backing down! She went like this!
她没有退缩！她快要扑上来了！
Phoebe: He's not backing down. He went to get lotion.
他没有退缩。他去拿乳液了。
Joey: Oh man! Aren't you guys done yet? !
你们还没玩完吗？！
Rachel: Joey look, just look at it this way, the sooner Phoebe breaks Chandler the sooner this is all over and out in the open.
菲比，早点攻破钱德勒，这件事就早一点完全公开。
Joey: Ooh! I like that! Oh, okay! Show him your bra! He's afraid of bras! Can't work them!
我喜欢。好吧。那好，让他看你的胸罩。他对胸罩没有抵抗力。
Phoebe: Wow! You didn't rip off any buttons.
哇！你没扯掉任何一个扣子。
Joey: It's not my first time.
这又不是第一次了。
Monica: You go back out there and you seduce her till she cracks!
你继续勾引她，直到她崩溃为止。
Chandler: Okay, give me a second! Did you clean up in here?
好棒，等一下。你在打扫这里？
Monica: Of course.
当然。
Chandler: Oh, you're going?
噢，你就要离开吗？
Phoebe: Umm, not without you, lover.
除非和你一起离开，爱人。
Phoebe: So this is my bra.
瞧，这是我的胸罩。
Chandler: It's very, very nice.
它看起来很棒。
Chandler: Well, come here. I'm very happy we're gonna have all the sex.
好吧，到这来。我真高兴，我们可以一起做♥爱。
Phoebe: You should be. I'm very bendy.
你应该开心，我的柔软度很好。
Phoebe: I'm gonna kiss you now.
我要吻你了。
Chandler: Not if I kiss you first.
除非我先吻你。
Chandler: Well, I guess there's nothing left for us to do but kiss.
我们现在除了接吻，没有别的事可做了。
Phoebe: Here it comes. Our first kiss.
来了。我们的初吻。
Chandler: Okay! Okay! Okay! You win! You win! I can't have sex with ya!
好吧，好吧，好吧，你赢了！我不能和你做♥爱！
Phoebe: And why not? !
为什么不？！
Chandler: Because I'm in love with Monica!
因为我爱莫妮卡！
Phoebe: You're what? !
你怎么了？！
Chandler: Love her! That's right, I…LOVE…HER!
爱她！对，我爱她！
Chandler: I love her! I love you, Monica.
我爱她！我爱你，莫妮卡。
Monica: I love you too Chandler.
我也爱你。钱德勒。
Phoebe: I just…I thought you guys were doing it, I didn't know you were in love!
我以为你们两个只是炮♥友。没想到你们相爱了。
Joey: So that's it! It's over! Everybody knows!
就是这样，结束了，大家都知道了。
Monica: Well actually, Ross doesn't.
其实，罗斯还不知道。
Chandler: Yes, and we'd appreciate it if no one told him yet.
请大家还不要告诉他。
Ross: No! No! What are you doing? ! GET OFF MY SISTER! !
不是吧。你在干什么放开我妹妹！
Phoebe: You know, you're friend's getting married, it's gotta change things.
朋友要结婚了，很多事都会改变。
Rachel: You really think it would be that different?
变化真的会那么大吗？
Phoebe: How could it not be? I mean pretty soon they're gonna be having kids, and then they're just gonna be hanging out with other couples who have kids. And then maybe they're gonna have to leave the city to be near a Volvo dealership.
怎么会没有？他们会有小孩，然后和有小孩的夫妇在一起。然后有可能离开城市，住在沃尔沃汽车代理商附近。
Rachel: Things change.
万事皆无常。
Joey: But I don't want them to move to a Volvo dealership.
我不希望他们住在沃尔沃汽车代理商附近。
Ross: It'll be okay Joe.
乔伊，会没事的。
Joey: Sorry, I just…I like things the way they are.
对不起，我只是喜欢他们原来的样子。
Rachel: Hey, who's this little naked guy?
这个光着身子的小孩是谁？
Ross: That little naked guy would be me.
这个光着身子的小孩是我。
Rachel: Aww, look at the little thing.
你看看这个小东西。
Ross: Yes, yes, fine, that is my penis. Can we be grown-ups now?
是啊。对，那是我的小鸡鸡。我们现在可以成熟点了吗？
Chandler: Who are those people?
这都是谁？
Ross: Got me.
问倒我了。
Monica: Oh, that's Nana right there in the middle.
正中间的是奶奶。
Rachel: Wow.
哇。
Monica: Let's see. "Me and the gang at Java Joe's."
我看看，“我和一帮朋友在爪哇乔店里”。
Rachel: Wow, Monica, you look just like your grandmother. How old was she there?
莫妮卡，你很像你祖母，那时她几岁？
Monica: Let's see, 1939. Yeah, 24,25.
我看看，1939年。对，24、25岁。
Ross: Looks like a fun gang.
看来是很快乐的一帮朋友。
Joey: Ooh, look-look-look-look-look! I got Monica naked!
看看看，我找到莫妮卡光着身子的照片了。
Rachel: Let me see.
我看。
Ross: No no, that would be me again.
不，这还是我。
Monica: Hey, you guys!
嘿，大伙儿！
Phoebe: Hey.
嘿。
Joey: Hey.
嘿。
Chandler: What's going on?
怎么了？
Rachel: Well, we were just talking about you guys getting married and how great it is.
我们刚刚提到，你们要结婚了，非常地棒。
Joey: Yeah, you can get a Volvo. If that's what you really want.
对，你们可以买一辆沃尔沃。如果你们真想那样的话。
Monica: Oh that's so sweet.
你们真好。
Chandler: So we both finished our vows.
我们都写完婚誓了。
Rachel: Oh, can we read them?
我们可以看吗？
Monica: Yeah, I don't hear Chandler's and he doesn't hear mine.
只要我不看到钱德勒的，他不看到我的就好。
Rachel: Okay.
好。
Phoebe: Okay.
好。
Phoebe: Oh, that's beautiful.
好感人。
Joey: Funny one! That's good!
好好笑！很好！
Rachel: Monica, will you marry me?
莫妮卡，你嫁给我好吗？
Joey: What? I don't get it.
什么？我没看懂。
Ross: Oh, yeah!
是哟！
Ross: Man, this is hilarious!
这太爆笑了！
Monica: Chandler!
钱德勒！
Chandler: Don't worry honey, we'll make yours funnier.
亲爱的，别担心，我们可以让你的更好笑。
Chandler: Okay, what do you guys think?
你们觉得如何？
Ross: Dude!
老兄！
Joey: I have never known love like this.
我从没见过这么伟大的爱情。
Chandler: You really like it?
你们真的喜欢吗？
Ross: Dude! How did you write this?
老兄！你是怎么写出来的？
Chandler: I stole Monica's and changed the name.
我抄了莫妮卡的，然后改了名字。
Ross: You can't do that!
你不能这么做！
Joey: If he goes first he can!
如果他先讲的话就可以！