Chandler: This is unbelievable. It's been like a half an hour. If this was a cartoon, you'd be looking like a ham right about now.
Joey: Oh, there's the waitress. Excuse me, Miss. Hello, Miss?
Chandler: It's Phoebe! Hi!
Ursula: Hi. Okay, will that be all?
Chandler:Wait, wait! What are you doing here?
Ursula: Yeah, um, I was over there, then you said "excuse me, hello Miss" so now I'm here.
Joey: No, no...how come you are working here?
Ursula: Right, yeah, cause it's close to where I live, and the aprons are really cute.
Chandler: Can we start over?
Ursula: Yeah. Okay great. I'm gonna be over here.
Chandler & Joey: No no no...
Ross: So I don't know whether he's testing me, or just acting out, but my monkey is out of control. Like, he keeps erasing the messages on my machine, supposedly by accident.
Rachel: Oh, yeah, I've done that.
Ross: And then, like three days in a row he got to the newspaper before I did, and peed all over the crossword.
Rachel: I've never done that.
Ross: You know last night, I don't know what he did but there were capers everywhere!
Chandler: All right, now look at her and tell me she doesn't look exactly like her sister.
Joey: I'm saying I see a difference.
Chandler: They're twins!
Joey: I don't care. Phoebe's Phoebe. Ursula's...hot!
Chandler: You know that thing, when you and I talk to each other about things?
Chandler: Let's not do that anymore.
Ross: Hi guys!
Monica, Pheobe & Rachel: Hey!
Joey: Hey Pheebs, guess who we saw today.
Phoebe: Ooh, ooh, fun! Okay...um, Liam Neeson.
Phoebe: Morly Safer.
Phoebe: The woman who cuts my hair!
Monica: Okay, look, this could be a really long game.
Chandler: Your sister Ursula.
Phoebe: Oh, really?
Chandler: Yeah, yeah, she works over at that place, uh...
Phoebe: Rift's. Yeah, I know.
Chandler: Oh, you do? Because she said you guys haven't talked in like years.
Phoebe: Hmmm? Yeah. So, um, is she fat?
Joey: Not from where I was standing.
Phoebe: Where were you standing?
Rachel: Um, Pheebs, so, you guys just don't get along?
Phoebe: It's mostly just dumb sister stuff, you know, I mean, like, everyone always thought of her as the pretty one, you know.
Phoebe: Oh, oh, she was the first one to start walking, even though I did it... later that same day. But, to my parents, by then it was like "yeah, right, well what else is new?"
Ross: Oh, Pheebs, I'm sorry, I've got to go. I've got Lamaze class.
Chandler: Oh, and I've got Earth Science, but I'll catch you in gym?
Rachel: So, is this just gonna be you and Carol?
Ross: No, Susan's gonna be there too. We've got dads, we've got lesbians, the whole parenting team.
Rachel: Well, isn't, isn't that gonna be weird?
Ross: No, no. I mean, it might been at first, but by now I think I'm pretty comfortable with the whole situation.
Monica: Ross, that's my jacket.
Ross: I know.
Woman: Hi, we're the Rostins. Err, I'm J.C. , and he's Michael. And we're having a boy and a girl.
Teacher: Good for you. Alrighty, next?
Ross: Hi, um, I'm err, I'm Ross Geller, and err ah... that's, that's my boy in there, and this is Carol Willick. And this is Susan Bunch. Susan is um Carol's, just, com... Who's next?
嗨，呃，我是呃，我是Ross Geller，这是我儿子，这位是Carol Willick，这位是Susan Bunch。Susan是Carol的…… 下一位是？
Teacher: I'm sorry, I didn't get it. Susan is...?
Ross: Susan's Carol's...Carol's...Carol's friend.
Susan: Life partner.
Ross: Like buddies.
Susan: Like lovers!
Ross: You know how close women can get.
Carol: Susan and I live together.
Ross: Although I was married to her.
Susan: Carol, not me.
Ross: Err, Right.
Carol: It's a little complicated.
Ross: A little.
Susan: But we're fine.
Ross: Absolutely! So, twins! That's like two births. Ouch!
Chandler: And ... to you too, Helen.
Helen: Nina Bookbinder is here to see you.
Chandler: Oh, OK, send her in.
Chandler: Hi, Nina. Come on in.
Nina: You wanted to see me?
Chandler: Uh, yes, yes. I've just been going over your data here, and little thing, you've been postdating your Friday numbers.
Nina: Which is bad, because...?
Chandler: Well, it throws my WENUS out of whack.
Nina: Excuse me?
Chandler: WENUS. Weekly Estimated Net Usage...
Nina: Oh, Net Usage Statistics, right! Gotcha! Gotcha. Won't happen again. I wouldn't want to do anything to hurt your... WENUS.
Monica: OK, I'll take "Idiots in the Workplace" for 200, Alex.
Chandler: OK, It's not just that she's cute, okay? It's just that... she's really, really cute.
Ross: It doesn't matter. You don't dip your pen in the company ink.
Rachel: God, I even know that and I'm pretty much unemployable.
Monica: Ross, your little creature's got the remote again.
Ross: Marcel, Marcel, give Rossy the remote. Marcel! Marcel, you give Rossy the remote right now! You give Rossy the remote...
Ross: Relax. I'll fix it.
Rachel: Oh, cool! Urkel in Spanish is Urkel.
Ross: How did he do this?
Chandler: So tell me something. Is leaving Christmas lights up a part of your plan to keep us merry all year long?
给我解释一下。你还开着圣诞灯是想让我们 "快乐" 一整年？
Monica: No, someone was supposed to take them down around New Years, but obviously someone forgot.
Rachel: Well, someone was supposed to write, "Rach, take down the lights"... and put it on the refrigerator...
那么某人应该写个字条 "Rachel，把圣诞灯拿下来" 然后贴在冰箱……上……
Rachel: How long has that been there?
Monica: A really long time.
Chandler: Hey, where you been?
Joey: I went back to Riff's.
Joey: I think Ursula likes me. All I ordered was coffee. She brought me a tuna melt and four plates of curly fries.
Joey: She is so hot!
Chandler: Yeah, listen, OK. Before you do anything Joeylike, you might want to run it by, uh...
Joey: Yeah? Yeah.
Joey: You think it would be okay if I asked out your sister?
Phoebe: Why? Why would you want to do that? Why?
Joey: So if we went out on a date, she'd be there.
Phoebe: Well, I mean, I'm not my sister's, you know, whatever, and uh, I mean, it's true, we were one egg, once. But, uh, you know, we've grown apart so uh... I don't know. Why not?
Joey: Cool. Thanks.