Rachel: What? You click when they click.
Teacher: All right, people, now everyone grab a partner.
Phoebe: Oh, all right. And my dead mother said you are it. I'm with Rachel.
Monica: Great, it's gym class all over again.
Teacher: Well, that’s all right. You can come up to the front and dance with me.
Monica: Why don't I just take off my clothes and have a nightmare?
Woman: It's okay, it's okay. I'm here, I'm here. I'm so sorry I'm late. Okay, here I am. So who's the new tense girl?
Teacher: She's your partner.
Woman: Hi, I'm Monica.
Monica: Oh, Monica. Hi, I'm Mon...Nana.
Monica: Yeah, It's Dutch.
Woman: You're kidding. I spent three years in Amsterdam.
Monica: Umm, Pennsylvania Dutch.
Teacher: And we're dancing. Five, six, seven, eight.
Joey: Hey. Where have you been?
Ross:I just got back from the vet.
Chandler: She's not gonna make you wear a big plastic cone, is she?
Ross: She says Marcel's humping thing is not a phase. Apparently, he's reached sexual maturity.
Joey: Hey, he beat you.
Ross: She says, as time goes on, he's gonna start getting aggressive and violent.
Chandler: So, what does this mean?
Ross: I have to give him up.
Joey: I can't believe it, Ross. This sucks.
Chandler: I don't get it. I mean, you just got him. How could he be an adult already?
Ross: I know, I know. I mean, one day he's this little thing...and then before you know it, he's this little thing I can't get off my leg.
Joey: Isn't there any way you can keep him?
Ross: No. No. The vet said unless he's in a place...where he has regular access...to some monkey loving...he's just gonna get vicious...I just gotta get him into a zoo.
Joey: How do you get a monkey into a zoo?
Chandler: I know that one. No, that's popes into a Volkswagen.
Ross: Well, we're applying to a lot of them. Naturally our first choice would be one of the bigger state zoos. You know, like San Diego. Right? But that may just be a pipe dream. Because you know he's out of state.
Ross: My vet knows someone at Miami, so that's a possibility.
Chandler: Yeah, but that's like two blocks away from the beach. I mean it's a total party zoo.
Phoebe: Hey, we found her. We found the girl.
Joey: Did you call the cops?
Rachel: No, we took her to lunch.
Chandler: Oh, your own brand of vigilante justice.
注释：vigilante:义务警员; （自发组织的）治安团体的成员; 〈美〉自卫队员。
Ross: What? Are you insane? This woman stole from you. She she stole. She's a stealer.
Monica: You know what, after you're with this woman for 10 minutes, you forget that.
Monica: I mean, she's this astounding person with this amazing spirit.
Ross: Yeah, which she probably stole from some cheerleader.
Chandler: Take off their hats.
Phoebe: Popes in a Volkswagen. I love that joke.
Rachel: No way. No way did you do this.
Fake Monica: Monana was very brave.
Monica: It was so wild. We told them we were the Gundersons in room 615...only to find out the Boston Celtics had taken over the entire sixth floor.
Fake Monica: So when they caught on the fact, well you know we're short and have breasts....
Monica: They threw us out. I was thrown out of a hotel. Me.
Rachel: Go, Monana.
Rachel: Well, you ladies are not the only ones living the dream. I get to go pour coffee for people I don't know. Don't wait up.
Fake Monica: Oh, by the way...tomorrow we're auditioning for a Broadway show.
Monica: Excuse me? There's an open call for Cats. I'm thinking we go down there, sing "Memories"...and make complete fools of ourselves. What do you say?
什么？ "猫" 剧还有一个缺额。我想我们可以去唱 "回忆"。让自己彻底当个傻子，如何？
Monica: No, no, no. Remember who you're dealing with here. I mean I'm not like you. I can't even stand in front of a tap class.
Fake Monica: That's just probably because of your Amish background.
Fake Monica: You're Pennsylvania Dutch, right?
Monica: Right. Till I bought a blow dryer. Then I was shunned.
Fake Monica: I...I used to be just like you. And then, one day, I saw a movie that changed my life.
Did you ever see Dead Poets Society?
Fake Monica: I thought that movie was so incredibly boring. I mean that thing at the end where the kid...kills himself because he can't be in the play? What was that? It's like,"Kid, wait a year. Leave home, do some community theater." I walked out of there and I thought, "That's two hours of my life that I'm never getting back." And that thought scared me more than all the other crap I was afraid to do.
Monica: Wow. Then I would definitely not recommend Mrs. Doubtfire.
Ross: Oh, God. We didn't get into Scranton. That was, like, our safety zoo. They take, like, dogs and cows. See, I don't know who this is harder on, me or him.
Rachel: I'd say that chair's taking the brunt of it.
Ross: Marcel. Marcel. Marcel, no. Good boy. See? How can nobody want him?
Rachel: Somebody will.
Joey: You know, there already is a Joseph Stalin.
Chandler: You're kidding.
Joey: Apparently, he was this Russian dictator who slaughtered all these people. You'd think you would've known that.
Chandler: You know, you'd think I would've.
Chandler: Hey, how about Joey Heatherton?
Joey: Come on, seriously, I told you I don't wanna go back to Joey. Phoebe, what do you think a good stage name for me would be?
Phoebe: Flame Boy.
Ross: Where exactly is your zoo?
Dr. Baldhara: Well, it's technically not a zoo, per se. It's more of an interactive wildlife experience. Let me ask you some questions about Marcel.
Dr. Baldhara: Yes. Does he fight with other animals?
Ross: No, no. He's very docile.
Dr. Baldhara: Umm, even if he were cornered?
Ross: Well, I don't know. Why?
Dr. Baldhara: How is he at handling small objects?
Ross: He can hold a banana, if that's what you mean.
Dr. Baldhara: What about a hammer or a small blade?