摩登家庭 第六季 第一集
Modern Family S06E01
Part1
2020年2月16日 09:30
我来给你擦 老公
Let me get that, husband.
在经历了状况频出的婚礼
After a storybook wedding
和梦幻的蜜月之后
and a magical honeymoon,
米奇尔和我终于喜结连理
Mitchell and I are finally newlyweds.
你不觉得坐在你自己的椅子上
Are you sure you wouldn't be more comfortable
更舒服一点吗
in your own chair?
别再说什么"你的""我的"了
There's no more "My chair" Or "Your chair."
几星期前 我们度完蜜月回来
So we got back from our honeymoon several weeks ago,
感觉就像还未...
and it feels like it never --
还未结束吗 老天呐
Never ended? Oh, my gosh.
感觉我们同心同德
It's like we have one mind and one heart.
还同椅
And one chair.
结婚三周月纪念日快乐
Happy three-month anniversary.
是今天吗
Oh, is that today?
我们公♥司♥今天有个无聊的鸡尾酒会
So, listen, I have this boring cocktail thing at the office,
但我应该六点就能到家了
but I should be home by 6:00,
然后我们可以直接去参加派对
and then we can head to the party.
给你的 小爸 大爸送的 又来了
For you, dad. From dad. Again.
花吗 但你昨天刚送花给我了呀
Flowers? But you just got me flowers yesterday.
你昨天早餐也吃了麦片啊
Well, you also had cereal yesterday.
我不介意今天可以再吃一点
And I wouldn't mind having some today.
怀念以前家里没这么多蜜蜂的时候
Sure was nice when this house wasn't full of bees.
女士要再来点糖浆吗
More syrup for milady?
何乐而不为 谢谢 您真好
Why, thank you, kind sir.
克莱尔 你和卢克做的曲奇饼还有吗
Claire, do we still have any of those cookies that you and Luke baked?
我们是那种拿曲奇饼当早餐的家庭吗
Are we the kind of family that has cookies for breakfast?
当然 我们就是
Yes, we are!
好耶 好耶
Yeah! Yeah!
有蝴蝶
A butterfly!
天呐
Oh, my god!
我们度过了
We are having...
有史以来最完美的
...the most perfect summer...
夏天
...ever.
别误会
Don't get me wrong,
邓菲家的生活还是很欢乐的
the Dunphys have had some great days.
只是这种时光总是断断续续的
We just have a little trouble stringing them together.
我们的最好纪录是连续八天的幸福日子
Our record was eight consecutive blissful days --
那是在2007年12月
December 2007.
简直是我们的光明节
It was our Hanukkah.
这个夏天 邓菲家所有人都相处融洽
This summer, all the Dunphys are just clicking.
没错 海莉和卢克和睦相处
Yeah, Haley and Luke are getting along,
艾丽克斯去给穷♥人♥盖房♥子了
Alex is off building houses for the poor.
我知道那听起来挺可怕的 但是她喜欢
Which I know sounds awful, but she loves it.
我的时尚博客人气暴涨
My fashion blog is blowing up.
我搞起了视频聊天秀
I started doing these live video chats,
现在我的频道有五万多订阅者
and now I have over 50,000 subscribers!
而且 我的头发状态好极了
Oh, plus, my hair has never looked better.
我不信教
I'm not a religious person...
但我就是幡然醒悟了
but I just woke up.
菲尔搞起了园艺
Phil has been gardening.
而我也有时间跟朋友小聚 读读名著
I've had time to catch up and read the classics.
那是在她不需要帮我完成
...when she isn't busy helping me
我的魔镜消失魔术的时候
with my magic-mirror disappearing trick.
我刚要说 突然之间 我爱上了魔术
I'm just gonna say it -- suddenly, I love magic.
我才不管现在是不是中午
I don't care if it's the middle of the day.
我只想把你关进箱子
I just want to put you in a box
往你身上插"剑"
and stick swords in you.
让这个夏天更加梦幻的是
If this summer wasn't magical enough,
我都还没吃到过一个坏李子
I haven't had a single bad plum!
天呐
Oh, my god!
这个拉链呢
So, the zipper --
天呐
oh, my god!
天呐
Oh, my god!
曼尼
Manny!
曼尼
Manny!
来 跟你的兄弟姐♥妹♥们♥聊聊
Come! Talk to your cousins!
你们好
Hola!
曼尼 你为什么把他们冻起来
Manny, why you freeze the Colombians?
如果我跟其中一个聊起来
If I talk to one of them,
我就得跟其他50个聊
I have to talk to 50 of them.
就当作是生日礼物啊
Just do it as a birthday gift.
你总是这样
You always do this.
你的生日在下个星期呢
Your birthday's not till next week.
不是我的生日
Not mine.
今天是你萝莎丽奥婶婶82岁生日
It's aunt Rosario's 82nd birthday today.
所以那些山羊才都戴着派对帽
That's why all the goats are wearing the party hats.
你看
Look!
曼尼
Manny!
大家好
Hi, everyone.
新眼镜是不是又漂亮又时髦
Pretty snazzy new cheaters, huh?
才五块钱
Five bucks.
很值 对吧
I know, right?!
我老公年纪是比较大
My husband is an older man,
但他还不是老头子
but he's not an old man.
但穿上运动服 现在又戴上老花镜
But with the track suit and -- and now the glasses,
他最近好像不再努力打扮了
it's like he just stopped trying lately.
生活不能只求舒适啊
Comfort is not everything.
成人礼后 我的脚趾就再没知觉了
My toes have been numb since my quinceanera.
我们五点再去酒吧
We don't have to be at drinks till 5:00,
我要去办点事
so I'm gonna run a few errands,
戴眼镜去兜兜风
take these bad boys for a spin.
杰 你为什么不♥穿♥我给你买♥♥的新衣服
Ay, Jay, why don't you wear that new outfit that I just got you?
那条多余的拉链显得太花哨了
Uh, a little flashy, that extra zipper.
就像一部没有目的地的楼梯
Like a staircase to nowhere.
是啊 但会让你看起非常
Yeah, but it makes you look very --
亲爱的 我很抱歉 掉在你脚趾上了
Honey, I'm so sorry. Right on your toes.
没关系 你可以把公用电♥话♥砸我脚上
It's fine. You can drop a pay phone on my foot.
我一点感觉也没有
I don't feel a thing anymore.
现在 我可爱的助手来协助我了
And now, as my lovely assistant joins me,
我要开始念咒语了
it's time to chant the incantation
将这位美女送到第六次元
that will send this fair maiden into the sixth dimension.
借梅林的帽子 格拉曼思雅的女巫之名
By the hat of Merlin, by the witches of Gramanthia,
我们为您奉上精彩的表演 消失
we do make this offering to you -- be gone!
成功了吗 我消失了吗
Did I do it? Did I disappear?
差一点 露出了点头
Almost. Just a little bit of forehead.
我可以再蹲低点
Oh, I can scrunch down.
这就是热爱
There's love.
你们好啊
Hey, guys.
太贴心了 你把筛粉机带来了
Sweet! You brought the sifter.
我可以做大黄派了
Now I can start my rhubarb pie.
我能帮你摘大黄吗
Ooh, can I help pick the rhubarb?
带路吧 小猫咪
Lead the way, kitten.
有人要吃李子吗
Anybody want a plum?
不用了
I'm good.
我给你拿瓶无醇啤酒
I'll grab you a roadie.
这么问可能不太合适
There is no easy way to ask this,
但你们这是嗑药了吗
but are you all high?
才不是 米奇尔 我们很幸福
No, Mitchell. We're happy.
我正在努力逃离幸福
Oh, I'm trying to get away from "Happy."
好吧 用最简洁的方法
All right, in the briefest possible way,
你直接告诉我是怎么回事吧
why don't you let me know what's going on?
小卡拒绝结束蜜月
Okay, Cam refuses to let the honeymoon end.
我收到了无数的花 和肉麻短♥信♥
I have a house full of flowers, endless romantic texts.
我知道 我听起来像个不懂感恩的混♥蛋♥
I know, I know, I sound like an ungrateful jerk.
是的
You do.
累死人了
It's exhausting.
更别提我完全无法给他对等的爱
Not to mention impossible to reciprocate.
天呐
Oh, my god!
总之
Um, anyway,
你觉得我该不该跟他温柔地说下
do you think that maybe I should talk to him gently
