摩登家庭 第二季 第一集
Modern Family S02E01
Part1
2020年2月16日 09:30
亲爱的 要我把车开出去吗
Honey, do you need me to move the car?
不 不用 我能行
No, it's nothing. I'm alright
不 铁十字给我力量 它要栽了
Oh no! Iron cross, she's going down
[铁十字 纳粹德军勋章]
当心 菲尔
Oh god! Phil...
-你没事吧 -没事
- You okay? - Yes. I am.
我没事
I am okay.
亲爱的 我们为什么要留着这辆车
Honey, why do we keep this car?
这车老经典了
It's a classic!
不 它只是空占地方
No, it just sits here.
安全带也坏了
And the seatbelts don't work.
门也卡 还漏油
The doors stick. It leaks fluids.
我们也十年没给它加过油了
We haven't put fluids in it in 10 years.
我会把这些毛病都修好
Well, I'm gonna fix all that anyway.
然后 送给海莉
And then, uh, it's gonna be Haley's car.
我才不要给海莉
Oh, we're not giving this car to Haley.
车后座都宽得可以放床垫了
It's way too easy to fit a mattress in the back.
当年这车可是我们的洞房♥啊
Remember?
要命了 这车必须卖♥♥
Oh, no. We're selling it.
什么
What?!
除非你觉得你卖♥♥不出
Unless you don't think you can.
-此话当真 -是的
- Really? - Yeah.
-确定当真 -绝对当真
- Seriously? - You can't.
你确定我卖♥♥不掉
You honestly think that's gonna work?
就是卖♥♥不掉
You can't sell it.
话说
You know what?
你怎么羞辱我都可以
You can insult a lot of things about me...
发型啊 声音啊 平衡板游戏啥的
My hair, my voice, my balance-board exercises...
就是不要羞辱我强大的销♥售♥能力
But don't insult my selling.
过分了哈
That crosses a line.
过在哪里 你瞧不见?
What line? Oh, you don't see it?
因为我以光速给它卖♥♥了
That's 'cause I just sold it.
《摩登家庭》第二季第一集
当这个美黑小星星声称
While the spray-tanned starlet claims
自己有六个星期没嗑药时 知情者爆料道
to be six weeks sober, sources down under say:
她就像一个嗑药过量的袋鼠一样
She has been bar-hopping
蹦啊跳啊混迹于酒吧
like a coked-up kangaroo."
爹地给你读什么呢
Ah, what's daddy reading to you?
如果还要我再读一次
If I have to read "the very hungry caterpillar"
《饥肠辘辘的毛毛虫》 我会抓狂的
One more time, I will snap.
-哪有那么差劲啊 -别逼人家
- oh, it's not that bad. - I will snap!
那啥 我把工具箱拿到外面了
So, um, I laid the toolbox outside,
所有的材料也都准备好了
And all the supplies are ready,
可以开工了
And I think we are good to go!
好极了
Terrific.
你不打算换身工人套装吗
Aren't you gonna change into a working man's outfit?
不用了
No, I'm good,
况且我不觉得工人管它叫"套装"
And I don't think workmen really call them "outfits."
我们要给莉莉建一座公主城♥堡♥
We are building a princess castle for Lily.
这是每个父亲都想给他女儿建的
Uh, it's something every father wants to be able to do for his daughter.
并且 我把自己幻想成
You know, and I fancy myself
这个城♥堡♥的设计师
as a bit of a castle designer.
我画了一些草图
I have done a few sketches.
那些以备后用 这样我们就能用组装套件
Which we have archived so we can use the kit.
-对 -套件
- Mm, yeah. - The kit.
套件 我们夫妇一条心一起做
Uh, the kit. Which, uh, we're gonna do together.
要跟米奇尔一起做这个还不如杀了我
I am petrified to do this with Mitchell.
他大学的时候做过几个戏剧的布景什么的
He built a couple of theater sets in college or something,
就以为自己是建筑帝了
And now he thinks he knows everything about building.
但他根本不搭边
Well, he doesn't.
每次我们家要做改造
Every home-improvement project that we've undertaken.
都让人好想死好想死
Has been a near-death experience.
做开胃菜 然后...
Make the appetizers. And then we'll be...
如果真出了啥意外 我希望他一下解决了我
If an accident does happen, I hope he kills me...
因为我觉得我不会是个乐观向上的残障人士
Because I don't think I would be a very inspiring disabled person.
亲爱滴 放亲松
Honey, relax.
她还没来
She's not here yet.
你最好蛋定一下 别猴急猴急的
You might want to play it a little cooler.
要不会把你女朋友吓跑的
You don't want to scare off your girlfriend.
她才不是我女朋友
She's not my girlfriend!
她只是过来跟我一起研究蚕的生命周期
She's just coming over to study the life cycle of silkworms.
嗷 她到了
Oh. She's here.
她到了 那啥 我头发不乱吧
She's here! okay, how's my hair?
是谁说只是朋友来着
I thought it was just a friend.
我可听到了
I heard that.
我故意的
I wasn't whispering.
曼尼去开门 让她感受什么叫宾至如归
Manny, open the door. Make her feel welcome.
凯莉 早上好
Kelly! Good morning.
欢迎你来我家
Uh, I'm glad you're here.
这是我妈
Um, this is my Mom.
很高兴认识你哦
Nice to meet you!
在我们的文化里
In my culture,
母亲都灰常粘儿子
mothers are very clingy to their sons.
其实呢 哥伦比亚妇女死亡的首要原因
In fact, the leading cause of death among Colombian women
就是她们的儿子要结婚
is when their sons get married.
但是我不会这样
But I'm not like that.
我只要曼尼高兴就好哩
I just want my Manny to be happy.
曼尼 叫你的朋友凯莉吃肉卷馅饼
Manny, why don't you give your friend Kelly an empanada?
不了 谢谢
Oh, no, thank you.
我尽量避免摄入反式脂肪
I try to stay away from trans fats.
哎呀呀 就吃一个没啥滴啦
Oh, I'm sure one won't make a difference.
这是曼尼的最爱哟
They're Manny's favorite!
我 我也不要吃反式脂肪了
I... think I'm going to stop eating trans fats, too.
妈 这是在哪拍的
Mom? When was this from?
这是我跟你♥爸♥去看玫瑰杯的时候拍的
Oh... That's the year your dad and I went to the rose bowl.
[玫瑰杯 于加州举♥行♥的美式足球赛]
-那场老精彩了 -是啊
- Incredible game. - Yeah.
妈 你看起来真美
Mom, you look really pretty.
谢谢你 宝贝儿
Thank you, sweetheart.
那后来怎么回事
So, what happened?
小卢克 人人都会变老嘛
Well, Lukey, everyone gets older.
即便你♥妈♥的♥风采不再
Just 'cause parts of your mom aren't what they used to be,
也不代表...
it doesn't meam...
我是想问比赛后来怎么样了
I mean, what happened in the game?
我们输给了宾州队
We got our butts kicked by Penn state.
但是游♥行♥非常棒
The parade was awesome, though.
是安吉拉·兰斯伯里担任司仪
Angela Lansbury was the grand marshal.
[著名女演员]
"美好的记忆" 她写道
"Good time," she wrote.
行了 继续收拾
Okay, come on, guys. Let's get back to it.
堆着这么多东西没人会买♥♥的
No one's gonna buy this heap looking this way.
恶 妈妈 垃圾丢哪边
Hey, mom, which one is the garbage can?
丢...
Um, it...
乖乖 这个不能丢
Honey, you can't throw that away.
这是小毯毯
It's blankety.
可它有够恶心
It's disgusting.
怎么会 亲爱的 你以前可喜欢它了
No, sweetie, you loved blankety.
你上哪儿都要带着它
You wouldn't go anywhere without him.
哈 直到卢克吐在上面
Yeah, until Luke threw up on it.
哈哈
Yeah.
我年轻的时候老吐
I used to throw up all the time.
还记得呕吐桶桶吗
Remember buckety?
看这个
Oh, look at this.
这是什么
What is that?
那天咱们去海边
We went to the beach one day,
卢克玩得很开心
and Luke had such a good time.
所以他要带一罐阳光回家
That he wanted to being home a jar of sunshine.
这样他就能永远记着了
So he could always remember it.
还记得吗 亲爱的
Do you remember, honey?
不 不不 别 别打开
Oh, no... no, no, don't... don't open it.
你真以为你把阳光收进罐子里了
You really think you trapped sunshine in there?
我现在通知你们
I'm just letting you know now,
