一个女人 是吧
Ooh. A woman, right? Huh!
这次爱上了一个有选举权的人
Fallen in love with somebody who's got the vote this time.
她多大 20吗
How old is she? 20?
不 她30岁左右
No, she's about 30.
你喜欢我奶♥子♥吗
Do you like my tits?
喂 奶♥子♥
Hello? Tits!
嗯 我爱你的奶♥子♥
Yeah. I love your tits.
你想射在上面吗
Do you wanna come on them?
好啊 我把套子取了
Sure. Let me just get this off.
还是别了 上次我长了不少疹子 还是后入吧
Actually, don't. I got a rash last time. Let's do it from behind.
好
Okay.
我要高♥潮♥了 你快了吗
I'm gonna come. Are you gonna come?
你刚是假装射了吗
Did you just fake it?
少胡说
Don't be stupid.
-你瞅什么 -把套子给我看看
- Why are you staring? - Show me the condom.
没门儿
No way.
精♥液♥呢 亚当
Where's the spunk, Adam?
性教育
第一季 第一集
你好啊
Whoa, there.
这不是厕所
This is not the bathroom.
抱歉 我很抱歉 我...
Sorry, man. I'm very sorry. I'm, uh--
在和我妈上♥床♥吗
Sleeping with my mother?
没错
Correct.
真尴尬 我是丹
Awkward. I'm Dan.
-你是 -欧帝斯
- And you are... - Otis.
别担心 我是左撇子
Don't worry. Left- handed.
-左边第一间 -谢了
- First door on your left. - Cheers, dude.
-早 亲爱的 -早
- Morning, darling. - Morning.
-要咖啡吗 -我煮好了
- Coffee? - I've got some.
吃吐司吗
Toast?
也许吧
Um... Maybe...
过会儿要去见病人
Uh, I've got clients in a few minutes.
欧帝斯 这位是...
Oh, Otis, this is, um--
我们见过了
We've met.
-喝咖啡吗 -好的 谢谢
- Coffee? - Oh, yes, please.
你多大 丹
How old are you, Dan?
我多大 我32岁
How old am I- - Uh, I'm 32.
你是提前进入中年危机了吗
You having some kind of preemptive midlife crisis?
-欧帝斯 -妈 他骑摩托
- Otis... - Mum, he rides a motorbike.
你要想的话 我可以载你去兜风
I'll take you for a ride in it, if you like?
不了 谢谢
No, thanks.
你有恋母情节吗
Do you have an Oedipal complex?
你是说我想和我妈做♥爱♥吗
As in, you mean do I wanna have sex with my mum?
-嗯 -并不
- Mm. - Uh, not really.
我对那不感兴趣
It's not really my thing, that.
无视他 他在逗你
Just ignore him. He's teasing you.
欧帝斯 一个年轻男子
Otis, it's perfectly normal for a younger man
想上一个成熟♥女♥性 这很正常
to be sexually attracted to a mature woman.
事实上 当你贬低他的选择
In fact, when you stigmatize his choice,
你就是在助长
then you feed into an unhealthy narrative
一种只有中年男人才有阳刚气的论调
on masculinity in middle age.
所以我说永远别和心理治疗师交往
That's why I say you should never date a shrink, huh?
是性♥爱♥和感情治疗师 谢谢
Sex and relationship therapist, thank you very much.
找我的
That's me.
我也该走了
Yeah, I should probably, uh, shoot off as well.
-谢谢 -嗯
- Thanks. - Okay.
-谢谢你做的一切 妈 -珍 珍 当然是珍
- Thanks for everything, Mum. - Uh, Jean. Jean. Definitely Jean.
好了
Okay.
-希望还能再见到你 伙计 -嗯
- Hopefully see you again, then, dude. - Yeah.
不太可能
Unlikely.
你♥妈♥的♥新男友太性感了吧
Your mum's new boyfriend is a big hot sticky wet dream.
嗯
Yeah.
我妈不交男友
Mum doesn't do boyfriends.
那两个是喜欢穿动物服装做♥爱♥的人吗
Are those the ones that like to do it in animal costumes?
不 他想她戴假鸡♥巴♥操他 但她不喜欢
No, he wants her to wear a strap-on. She's not really into it.
典型的权力等级问题
It's a classic power dynamic issue.
我真希望我妈是个性♥爱♥大♥师♥
Aww! I wish my mum was a sex guru.
相信我 这不是好事
Trust me, you don't.
玛乔丽
Marjorie...
你和你的阴♥茎♥相处得如何
how are you getting on with your penis?
-我不讨厌 -很好
- I'm not hating it. - Fantastic.
我们开始吧
Okay, let's proceed.
所以你做了吗
So, did you do it?
别跟我说你又退缩了
Don't tell me you choked again.
-你都没尝试 -我放弃了
- You didn't even try. - I've given up.
太复杂了 我不 我不想谈
It's too much. I don't... I don't wanna talk about it.
到底是什么问题
I mean, what exactly is the problem here?
你能硬吗
I mean, can you even get a hard-on?
当然可以 我又不是太监
Of course I can. I'm not a fucking eunuch, all right?
我只是 我会等鸡鸡软下去
I just- - I wait for them to go away.
我不喜欢那种感觉 能别说这个了吗
I don't like how it feels. Can we drop it now, please?
无意冒犯 但那太奇怪了
No offense, but that is super weird.
太奇怪了
Super weird.
天 不可接触者们竟然有车
Oh, my God, the Untouchables have a car.
就当你以为他们已经够难捉摸时
Just when you thought they couldn't get any more elusive,
他们又有了车
now they have wheels!
你觉得安瓦有在健身吗 身材看着很紧致
You reckon Anwar's been workin' out? He's lookin' extra tight.
就因为他是我们这年级唯二的同志之一
Just because he's the only other gay in our year,
-不代表你得喜欢他 -纠正
- it doesn't mean you have to fancy him. - Yeah, correction.
我们所知道的唯一同志
Only other gay we know of.
同志可能遍布任何角落
Could be anywhere.
你看什么呢 变♥态♥
What are you lookin' at, El Pervo?
你听到没
Did you hear that?
他跟我说话了 还不是胡言乱语
He spoke to me! With actual words!
他说你是西班牙变♥态♥
He called you a Spanish pervert.
今年一定会很精彩
Oh, this is gonna be such a good year!
我能感觉到
I can feel it!
-那是汤姆·贝克吗 -嗯
- Is that?Tom Baker? - Yup.
战锤社团的团长 他终于进入青春期了
Captain of the Warhammer Society. His balls finally dropped.
我一直跟你说
Yeah, I keep telling you,
所有人今年暑假都有做♥爱♥
man, everyone has had sex over the summer.
-所有人除了你 -还有你
- Everyone except you. - And you.
不好意思 我给那个我在巴特林营地
Excuse me, I gave two and a half hand jobs
认识的男的打了两次半飞机
to that guy I met in Butlin's.
-为什么有半次 -中途被打断了
- Why the half? - We got interrupted.
该死的惊喜卡拉OK
Stupid surprise karaoke.
所以还是不能算破处
Still, not exactly a player.
至少我可以摸我自己的老二
Yeah, at least I can touch my own penis.
我很担心你
I'm worried about you, man.
看看四周
Like, look around.
人们要么在想着滚床单
Everybody's either thinking about shagging,
即将滚床单
about to shag,
或者正在滚床单
or actually shagging,
而你连自♥慰♥都不行
and you can't even jack your beanstalk.
-我时间多的是 -我可说不好
- I've got plenty of time. - Mm, I don't know, man.
这里的一切都在变 而且变得很快
Everything's changing round here, and it's changing fast.
那就是明证 就连梅芙·怀利的乳♥房♥♥都变大了
Case in point, even Maeve Wiley's boobs have gotten bigger,
我还以为从技术上来说不可能呢
which I thought was technically impossible.
我看没什么变化
They look the same to me.
我听说她咬了西蒙·福尔哈赛的下♥体♥
I heard she bit Simon Furthassle on the scrote,
现在都硬不起来了
and now, it's all wonky.
-就跟打折的牛油果一样 -不是真的吧
- Like a discount avocado. - I don't think that's true.
我听说她在玩真心话大冒险时10分钟内给12个男的口了
I heard she sucked off 12 guys in ten minutes for a dare.
-绝对不是真的 -真是个荡♥妇♥
- That's definitely not true. - What a slag.
瞧瞧那油腻的头发 估计是买♥♥不起洗发水
Look at that greasy hair. Maybe she can't afford shampoo.
-或者除臭剂 -我就说吧
- Or deodorant. - Told you.
她就是个女色鬼
She's basically a nympho.
这是个新世界 我的性压抑朋友
This is a new frontier, my sexually repressed friend.
我们终于有机会在社交食物链上更上一层了
Our chance to finally move up the social food chain.
我们要从
We shall transform
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