I'm seeing motion detectors on the ground floor.
门上的硬件看上去是标配
Hardware on the doors looks standard issue.
-我没看见烟雾报♥警♥器 -看紧点
- I can't see any smoke alarms. - Just stay close.
我看到至少有三个全副武装的守卫在守着
I saw at least three armed guards on the perimeter.
好的 老大
Right, boss.
-你在干什么 -我认得这个安全系统
- What the hell are you-- - I recognize the security system.
我父母有个一模一样的
My parents had the exact one.
不等你们有机会破门而入
I'll have the access code cracked and security disabled
我就已经破解安保密♥码♥
before you could say breaking and entering.
看 我们可以进去了
There. We're in.
我可不这么认为
I wouldn't be so sure about that.
为什么
Why's that?
因为你刚刚破解了一个陷阱系统
Because you just tapped into a dummy box,
那些守卫要过来了
which means those guards are gonna be here--
比你说"菜鸟犯错"四个字还快
Quicker than you can say rookie mistake.
举起手来
Hands up.
-那么 谁想来一发 -我
- So, who wants a hit? - Yeah, man--
我记得你和我说过你要戒了的
I believe you told me you were trying to quit.
没你的份 老头儿
Oh, none for you, silver top?
我
I...
我不抽大♥麻♥
I don't partake in cannabis.
不再抽 准确地说
Anymore, that is.
说起来 也许你应该少抽点
In fact, perhaps you should take it easy.
它让我思维更活跃
Ah, it helps me think better.
老爹
Dad.
是 但会影响你的长♥期♥健康
Yes, but what about the long-term health consequences?
说起来 你最好别吃含饱和脂肪的东西
Speaking of which, you might want to lay off the saturated fats.
那么
So, uh...
阿尔法粒子
Alpha Particles.
令人兴奋的东西
Exciting stuff.
可惜还要花至少十年才能追踪到
Too bad detection is at least a decade away.
很可能是二十年
More like two decades.
我发明了一个小东西
But I've worked up a little something.
科学就是未来 对吧
Science is all about the future, right?
我做了一个粒子追踪器原型机
I've developed a prototype particle tracker.
最前沿的
Cutting edge.
大概能给我带来一百万的收入
Probably gonna mint me $1,000,000.
整整一百万
A whole million.
我马上回来
Mm, be right back.
我记得冰箱里还有点碎巧克力饼干
I think I've got some chocolate chip cookie dough in the fridge.
我不能相信那人是你
I cannot believe that that is you.
说真的 我完全不知道你以前这么酷
Seriously, I had no idea you were ever cool.
我那不是酷 我曾经是自大的小混♥蛋♥
I wasn't cool. I was an arrogant little snot.
只是曾经
Was?
你在干嘛
What are you doing?
找年轻版的我做的粒子追踪器
Looking for my younger self's particle tracker.
看着点门 还有那个我回来的时候
Keep an eye on the door, and when I get back,
别再和我调情了
stop flirting with me.
是你在和我调情
You were the one flirting with me.
这有什么大不了的
Look, what's the big deal?
年轻版的你还没结婚
I mean, younger you isn't married yet,
所以严格来说你没劈腿
so technically it's not cheating.
1975年10月
October 1975.
我遇见了未来的妻子克拉丽莎
This is right when I meet my future wife, Clarissa.
所以显然 不能让年轻的我
So obviously, we wouldn't want my former self
被未来的性感刺客诱惑
tempted by a sexy assassin from the future.
你觉得我性...
Aw, you think I'm sex--
你最好就此打住
Do not finish that sentence.
找到了
Found it.
打开柜子需要什么机关吗
Is there a trick to opening the case?
你们在干什么
What are you doing?
拿了匕♥首♥就走吧
Let's grab the dagger and let's go.
雷蒙德 没人闯进糖果店
Raymond, you don't break into a candy store
却只偷一颗口香糖的
and steal one gumball.
你们拿走这些好东西
You guys grab the goodies.
我去找保险箱
I'll find the safe.
你们知道自己在干什么吗
What do you think you're doing?
我们是为这个来的
This is what we came here for.
不 你才是为这个来的
No, it's what you came here for.
拿开你的手
Take your hand off me.
我不会让你再破坏任务
I'm not gonna let you jeopardize another mission.
敬酒不吃吃罚酒
I'm done asking politely.
这才是我的任务
This is my mission.
那我就会任凭
And I'm gonna listen to a guy
这下好了
Great.
现在我们俩都要进监狱了
Now we're both going to prison.
找到了
Eureka.
我记得我造它的时候
I remember building this.
那种似曾相识的感觉
It's... it's like dejavu all over again.
把东西放下
Put that down.
你真是太会把风了
Excellent job watching the door.
你要干什么
What are you doing?
只是
Oh, just, uh...
这是什么
what is this?
是你不该乱碰的东西
Something you shouldn't be fooling around with.
外形非常有趣
It's very interesting-looking.
别说废话了
How about you cut the crap?
你指的是哪句废话
To which crap are you referring?
我已经获得两个博士学位 正在考第三个
I hold two PhDs, and I'm working on a third.
我是五次卡林奖得主
I'm a five-time winner of the Carlin Award.
我想说的是 我觉得
My point being, is I don't believe
你身边的两个小屁孩
either of those kids you're hanging around with
甚至不会拼物理这个词
can even spell physics.
我越来越不喜欢灰发老头的
You know, I'm beginning to like the younger gray
年轻版了
less and less.
你们不解释这是怎么回事
Either you tell me what the hell is going on,
我就叫校警了
or I'm calling campus police.
我本来不该告诉你的
I'm not supposed to tell you.
这样会引起...麻烦
It could cause-- well, trouble.
我们是为了下月的《威尔斯》期刊
We're here to interview you for a profile
来采访你的
in next month's Wells Journal?
《威尔斯》只会采访诺贝尔候选人
The Wells only profiles Nobel candidates.
鉴于你出众的才华 我们打算破例
An exception is being made in light of your obvious brilliance.
如果我们能把这台机器借走几个小时
I know a photograph of this device would make
一定能拍出惊人照片做封面
a spectacular cover if we could just borrow it for a few hours.
谢了 但是我在这机器上花了两年的心血
Thanks, but that's two years of my life.
我不会让你带走的
I'm not letting you walk away with it.
走开
Stay back!
磨蹭太久了
That was taking too long.
你就这样把我敲晕了
You just knocked me out.
完美的大脑 被你打昏过去
That beautiful brain, struck unconscious.
只有这样才能让你闭嘴
The only way to shut you up.
你在干什么 我们要走了
What are you doing? We have to go.
我得确保我今晚及时醒来
I have to make sure I wake up in time
去参加院系聚会
to go to this faculty mixer tonight.
有一位教授会带他的侄女去参加
One of the professors is bringing his niece,
就是我未来的妻子
AKA my future wife.
走吧
Let's go!
到底怎么回事
What the hell happened?
-都怪这白♥痴♥ -怪你的拍档
- It was this idiot's fault. - Your partner's fault.
我和你说了不能带他来
I told you we shouldn't have brought him.
没错 但是我们还有更大的麻烦
Agreed, but we got bigger problems.
我要你找到保险丝盒
I need you to find the fuse box and--
恢复系统默认设置
Trigger a system default.
这事还没完
This ain't over.
你怎么知道要这么做
How did you know how to do that?
小的时候 我爸爸带我去干活
When I was a kid, my dad brought me along on jobs.
我双手细小
I had little hands.
我可以挤进狭小的空间
I could get into tiny spaces,
可以完成他要我做的事
do whatever he needed me to do,
比如说 重新连接保安系统