Well,I don't see how you could.
我想说的是 或许你不能把 这些当作纯粹智力习题来对待
What I'm trying to say is that maybe you can't approach this as a purely intellectual exercise.
What do you mean?
Well,remember when you tried to learn how to swim using the Internet?
Ididlearn how to swim.
On the floor.
The skills are transferable.
I just have no interest in going in the water.
Then why learn how to swim?
The ice caps are melting,Leonard.
In the future,swimming isn't going to be optional.
But you do bring up an interesting point.
I don't have to break new ground here.
I'm sure much of the research already exists.
不 不 我想说的是 如果你想学如何交友
No,no,my point is,if you want to learn how to make friends,
then just go out to a coffee shop or a museum.
Meet people. Talk to them.
Take an interest intheirlives.
That's insane on the face of it.
- 走吧 - 我们去哪儿?
- Come on. - Where are we going?
You're driving me to the mall.
I'm going to acquire a book that summarizes the current theories in the field of friend-making.
Why don't you just lie down on the floor and swim there?
Coping with the Death of a Loved One.
- 节哀顺变 - 感谢你
- My condolences. - Thank you.
- 家人还是朋友? - 家人
- Family or friend? - Family.
If it had been a friend,I'm available to fill the void.
It's just as well. She smelled like mothballs.
好吧 要是你在这嗅人玩 我去买点热脆饼
Okay,if you're gonna start sniffing people,I'm gonna go get a hot pretzel.
Do you have any books about making friends?
嗯 有 但都是写给小孩子的
Um,yeah,but they're all for little kids.
I assume the skills can be extrapolated and transferred.
I guess. They're right over there by the wooden train set.
I love trains.
I bet you do.
哎 呀 还真粘
Oh,my,that's awfully sticky.
All right,let's see...
Bernie Bunny Has Two Daddies Now.
That's probably about homosexual rabbits.
Gerry the Gerbil and the Bullies on the Bus.
Read it. Not helpful.
Oh,here we go.
Stu the Cockatoo Is New at the Zoo.
莎拉·卡朋特作 现与其爱人 朋友马克以及鹦鹉斯图
"Author Sarah Carpenter lives in Fort Wayne,Indiana
"with her husband and best friend,Mark,and their cockatoo Stu."
Hardly makes her an expert in making friends,wouldn't you agree?
I don't like birds. They scare me.
Most people don't see it.
What are you reading?
Oh,I do like monkeys.
Curious George is a monkey.
Somewhat anthropomorphized,but yes.
或许 啥时候咱俩去看个猴子呗 你觉得好不?
Say,maybe sometime you and I could go see monkeys together. Would you like that?
Sheldon,what are you doing?
I'm making friends with this little girl. What's your name?
嗨 瑞贝卡 我是你的新朋友谢尔顿
Hi,Rebecca. I'm your new friend,Sheldon.
不 别搞了 走吧
No,you're not. Let's go.
- 我俩聊得正投机呢 - 别抬头 上面有摄像头
- We were really hitting it off. - Don't look up. There's cameras.
********the "How well do you know Sheldon" section,
what did you put for his favorite amino acid?
- 赖氨酸 - 赖氨酸
- Lysine. - Lysine.
完了 我本来写了赖氨酸 又改了
Damn it,I had lysine and changed it.
Oh,good,you're just in time.
I believe I've isolated the algorithm for making friends.
Sheldon,there is no algorithm for making friends.
得了 听他讲完 要是真有啥发现
Well,hear him out. If he's really onto something,
we could open a booth at Comic-Con.Make a fortune.
See,my initial approach to Kripke had the same deficiencies
as those that plagued Stu the Cockatoo when he was new at the zoo.
Stu the Cockatoo?
Yes. He's new at the zoo.
It's a terrific book.
I've distilled its essence into a simple flow chart that will guide me through the process.
Have you thought about putting him in a crate while you're out of the apartment?
你好 Kripke? 我是谢尔顿·库珀
Hello,Kripke? Sheldon Cooper here.
It occurred to me that you hadn't returned any of my calls
because I hadn't offered any concrete suggestions for pursuing our friendship.
Perhaps the two of us might share a meal together.
Well,then perhaps you'd have time for a hot beverage?
最受欢迎的有茶 咖啡 可可
Popular choices include tea,coffee,cocoa.
了解了解 别 先别挂
I see. No,no,no,wait. Don't hang up yet.
What about a recreational activity?
I bet we share some common interests.
Tell me an interest of yours.
Really? On actual horses?
Tell me another interest of yours.
抱歉 不到逼不得已 我才不下水游泳
I'm sorry. I have no desire to get in the water till I absolutely have to.
Tell me another interest of yours.
Uh-oh,he's stuck in an infinite loop.
I can fix it.
Interesting,but isn't ventriloquism by definition a solo activity?
Yeah. Tell me another interest of yours.
Is there any chance you like monkeys?
What is wrong with you? Everybody likes monkeys.
A loop counter and an escape to the least objectionable activity.
I'm surprised you saw that.
Gee,why can't Sheldon make friends?
好了 Kripke 你刚说那兴趣爱好 是我不太讨厌的
All right,Kripke,that last interest strikes me as the least objectionable,
and I would like to propose that we do that together.
是的 我付钱 好的 拜拜
Yes,I'll pay. All right,good-bye.
All right. Time to learn rock climbing.
You know,I am a fan of ventriloquism.
Maybe you,me and your dummy could go get a hot beverage.
He could talk while you drink.
Nope. I wanna climb some rocks.
This appears significantly more monolithic than it did on my laptop.
One expects to see hominids learning to use bones as weapons.
You afraid of heights,Cooper?
Hardly. A fear of heights is illogical.
A fear of falling,on the other hand,is prudent and evolutionary.
What would you say is the minimum altitude I need to achieve to cement our newfound friendship?
好啦 这开生日会呢 小盆友都爬
Come on,they have birthday parties here. Little kids climb this.
Little kid hominids perhaps.
So is this your entire job? Your parents must be so proud.
- 来啊 库珀 - 来了 Kripke
- Let's go,Cooper. - I'm coming,Kripke.
Okay,the harness seems to be secure.
A small amount of incontinence just now,but the Web site said that's to be expected.
this isn't so bad. It's like vertical swimming.
嘿 瞧瞧 库珀 都爬到一半了
Hey,look at you,Cooper. You're almost halfway to the top.