Previously on The Big Bang Theory...
I am going to the Arctic Circle
我和莱纳德 沃罗威茨 库萨帕里
with Leonard, Walowitz, and Koothrappali.
- For three months? - Yes.
What did you mean when you said you were going to miss me?
It means I wish you weren't going.
Oh, thank God we're home.
I can't believe we spent three months in that frozen hell.
It was like a snowy nightmare
from which there was no awakening.
I don't know what Arctic expedition you guys were on,
but I thought it was a hoot and a half.
Oh, hi, Mom.
No, I told you I'd call you when I got home.
不 我说了 到家了再打电♥话♥给你
I'm not home yet.
All right, I'm home.
The Arctic expedition was a remarkable success.
I'm all but certain there's a Nobel Prize in my future.
Actually, I shouldn't say that.
I'm entirely certain.
No, Mother, I could not feel
不 妈妈 我感觉不到
your church group praying for my safty.
The fact that I'm home safe does not prove that it worked.
The logic is post hoc ergo propter hoc.
No, I'm not sassing you in Eskimo talk.
I'm gonna go let Penny know we're back.
Mother, I have to go.
Yeah, love you. Bye.
Hello, old friend.
Leonard, you're back.
Yeah. I just stopped by to say-- hmph!
- Yeah. So, hi. - Hi.
Damn it, I should have gone over and told her we were back.
Yeah, it was first-come, first-serve.
I just want you both to know,
When I publish my findings,
I won't forget your contributions.
- Great. - Thanks.
Of course, I can't mention you in my Nobel acceptance speech,
but when I get around to writing my memoirs,
you can expect a very effusive footnote
and perhaps a signed copy.
We have to tell him.
Tell me what?
Damn his Vulcan hearing.
You fellows are planning a party for me, aren't you?
Okay, Sheldon, sit down.
If there's going to be a theme I should let you know
that I don't care for luau, toga or "under the sea."
Yeah, we'll keep that in mind. Look...
We need to talk to you about something that happened at the North Pole.
If this is about the night the heat went out,
there's nothing to be embarrassed about.
It's not about that.
And we agreed never speak of it again.
So we slept together naked.
It was only to keep our core body temperatures from plummeting.
He's speaking about it.
For me, it was a bonding moment.
Sheldon, you remember the first few weeks
We were looking for magnetic monopoles
And not finding anything and you were acting
like an obnoxious, giant dictator?
thought we were going to be gentle with him.
That's why I added the "tator."
And then when we finally got our first positive data,
you were so happy.
In the world of emoticons, I was colon, capital "D."
Well, in actuality, what your equipment detected
wasn't so much evidence of paradigm-shifting monopoles
as it was...
static from the electric can opener
we were turning on and off.
He just went colon, capital "O."
You tampered with my experiment?
We had to.
It was the only way to keep you
from being such a huge Dickensian.
You see that? I add the "ensian."
Did Leonard know about this?
Leonard's my best friend in the world.
Surely Leonard didn't know.
Actually, it was his idea.
Of course it was. The whole plan weeks of Leonard.
- I missed you so much. - I missed you, too
I couldn't even think of anyone else while you were gone.
Except for one night when the heat went out.
Long story. It's... Don't ask.
Do not make a sound.
Whispering, "Do not make a sound..."
...is a sound.
Damn his Vulcan hearing.
Not a good time, Sheldon.
Oh, this is ridicules.
I realize you're currently at the mercy
of your primitive biological urges,
but as you have an entire lifetime
of poor decisions ahead of you, may I interrupt this one?
It's great to see you too. Come on in.
Wolowitz has informed me of your grand deception.
Do you have anything to say for yourself?
Yes, I feel terrible about it.
I will never forgive myself, I don't expect you to, either,
and I would really appreciate it if you would leave me with Penny
for a session of self-criticism and repentance.
Okay, can someone please tell me what's going on here?
What's going on is I was lead to believe
I was making groundbreaking strides in science,
when in fact, I was being fed
false data at the hands of Wolowitz, Koothrappali
and your furry little boy toy.
Is that true?
It was the only way to make him happy.
Well, why'd you have to make him happy?
Because when he wasn't happy, we wanted to kill him.
There was even a plan.
We were going to throw his kindle outside,
and when he went to get it, lock the door
and let him freeze to death.
That seems like a bit of an overreaction.
No, the overreaction was the plan to tie your limbs