你头该朝这边
Your head goes on the other end.
为什么?
Why?
宇宙规律
It's culturally universal.
床 即使是临时的床
A bed,even a temporary bed,
都该床头朝向门口
is always oriented with the headboard away from the door.
是遵循古老的传统 防止自己被偷袭
It serves the ancient imperative of protecting oneself against marauders.
我情愿冒险
I'll risk it.
还有什么要提醒的吗?
Anything else should I know?
如果你用了我牙刷 我会从这个窗口跳下去
Yes,if you use my toothbrush, I'll jump out that window.
请别来参加我的葬礼 祝您晚安
Please don't come to my funeral. Have a good night.
很抱歉
Sorry about that.
没关系
That's okay.
他的牙刷是紫外灯下树脂格子里红色的那个
Fyi-- his toothbrush is the red one in the plexiglas case under the uv light.
明白
Got it.
睡塌实
Well,sleep tight.
谢谢
Thanks.
这么说还挺好玩的 睡塌实
Funny expression,"sleep tight."
这是因为早期床的结构
It refers to the early construction of beds
床垫被绳索吊起来 所以偶尔会...
which featured a mattress suspended on interlocking ropes,which would occasionally...
睡塌实
sleep tight.
你干嘛呢?
what are you doing?
我们搬进来后每个周六早晨 我都在6:15准时醒来
Every saturday since we've lived in this apartment I have awakened at 6:15,
给自己冲一碗麦片
poured myself a bowl of cereal,
倒四分之一杯百分之二的牛奶
added a quarter cup of two percent milk,
坐在沙发的这边
sat on this end of this couch,
打开英国广播公司美国频道 看<神秘博士>
turned on bbc america,and watched doctor who.
Penny还睡着呢
Penny's still sleeping.
我们搬进来后每个周六早晨 我都在6:15准时醒来
Every saturday since we've lived in this apartment I have awakened at 6:15,
- 给自己冲一碗麦片... - 知道了 知道了
- poured myself a bowl of cereal... - I know,I know.
你自己房间有台电视
Look,you have a tv in your room.
你为什么不来个床上早餐呢?
Why don't you just have breakfast in bed?
因为我既不是残疾 也不是庆祝母亲节的妇女
Because I am neither an invalid,nor a woman celebrating mother's day.
现在几点?
What time is it?
差不多6点半
Almost 6:30.
我睡了一整天?
I slept all day?
没有 是早上6点半
No,it's 6:30 in the morning.
你们有病吧?
What the hell is your problem?
太棒了 这碗麦片再不彼此分子独立了
Okay,this cereal has lost all its molecular integrity.
我现在有一碗麦片糊了
I now have a bowl of shredded wheat paste.
早安 我聪明的怪友们
Hola,nerd-migos.
大早上的怎么都不睡觉呢?
Why do you people hate sleep?
你穿着我的浴袍吗?
Are you wearing my robe?
是啊 抱歉 我会洗干净
Oh,yeah. Sorry,I'll have it cleaned.
没关系 你自己留着吧
That's okay,keep it.
Christy呢?
Where's christy?
在洗澡
In the shower.
顺便问一句 你从哪买的丝瓜巾?
Oh,by the way,where did you get that loofah mitt?
能洗到死角哦
Yours reaches places that mine just won'T.
你用了我的丝瓜巾?
You used my loofah?
准确地说 是我俩用了
More precisely,we used your loofah.
我把她搓得欲♥仙♥欲♥死
I exfoliated her brains out.
这个也送给你了
You can keep that,too.
那么...我还想谈谈你的毛毛熊收♥藏
Well,then we'll probably need to talk about your stuffed bear collection.
Howard?
Howard?
在这里 宝贝!
In here,milady!
我的小火车在这里
There's my little engine that could.
卡嚓 卡嚓...
Chugga-ghugga,chugga-chugga...
我再也不会看这本书了 (畅销童话: <小火车做到了>)
Well,there's one beloved children's book I'll never read again.
嗨 我是Christy
Hi. Christy.
Leonard
Leonard.
我是Sheldon
I'm sheldon.
对 你们是Howard的随从
Right. You're howard's entourage.
Christy 你打算怎么安排?
Uh,so,christy,what are your plans?
Howard说带我去比佛利山购物
Oh,well,howard said he'd take me shopping in beverly hills.
不是 我的意思是你的住处
Yeah,no,I meant plans to find someplace to live.
除了我这里
You know,other than with me.
我不是不欢迎你...
Not that I don't love having you,but it'S...
只是有点挤
it's a little crowded.
Penny 你想过来随时都可以啊
You know,penny,you're always welcome to stay with us.
太好了
Oh,terrific.
把这里当小旅店了
Now we're running a cute little b & B.
我作为局外人提个建议
Let me offer a little outside-the-box thinking here.
Christy可以跟我住
Why doesn't christy stay with me?
首先 你住你妈家
For one thing,you live with your mother.
不是的
I do not.
是我妈住我家
My mother lives with me.
这样安排很好
Well,then it's all settled.
Christy住Howard那里 Penny回自己房间
Christy will stay with howard,penny can go back to her apartment,
我还有24分钟的<神秘博士>可看
and I'll watch the last 24 minutes of doctor who.
不过现在只能说是 <看不看没所谓博士>了
Although at this point,it's more like doctor why bother?
Sheldon 你不能这么独裁...
Sheldon,you just can't dictate...
不要说话 全都走!
no more talking! Everybody go!
你怎么样?
So what do you say?
我们去Wolowitz之家修缮一下吧?
Want to repair to casa wolowitz?
什么地方? 墨西哥快餐店?
What is that,like a mexican deli?
不好意思 之前没告诉你
I'm sorry,I should have mentioned this earlier.
我姓Wolowitz
My last name is wolowitz.
哇 有意思
Oh,that's so cool.
我的第一个犹太人
My first jew.
看来她没睡过名叫Kosher Cornhuskers的 (符合犹太食品要求的剥玉米农)
I imagine there aren't very many kosher cornhuskers.
你会带我去购物吧?
But you're still taking me shopping,right?
那是当然
Anything you want.
好的 我去拿行李
Okay,I'll go pack my stuff.
待克隆人技术成熟时 我要12个这样的
When they perfect human cloning,I'm going to order 12 of those.
Howard 你看不出来她在利用你吗?
Howard,can't you see she's using you?
管她呢? 昨晚她脱下睡衣 我激动得都流泪了
Who cares? Last night,she pulled off her blouse and I wept.
Howard 我了解她 懂吗?
Look,howard,I know her. Okay?
谁给她买东西 她就跟谁上床
She'll have sex with anyone,as long as they keep buying her things.
- 真的? - 是啊
- Really? - Yeah.
爽!
Yay!
失陪了 我要去兑换我的成人礼金券
If you'll excuse me,I have some bar mitzvah bonds to cash.
很抱歉 没有Wolowitz我们没法吃
I'm sorry,we cannot do this without wolowitz.
没有Wolowitz我们就不能吃中餐?
We can't order chinese food without wolowitz?
我跟你解释
Let me walk you through it.
我们是这么点的 头道蒸饺 然后左公鸡
Our standard order is: The steamed dumpling appetizer,general tso's chicken,
西兰花牛柳 虾酱和素菜捞面
beef with broccoli,shrimp with lobster sauce and vegetable lo mein.
发现问题了吧
Do you see the problem?
发现一个不知道是不是的
I see a problem.
我们的菜单首先从四个饺子开始
Our entire order is predicated on four dumplings
剩下四道菜四个人分
and four entrees divided amongst four people.
那就只要三道菜好了
So,we'll just order three entrees.
好 那么舍弃哪道?
Fine. What do you want to eliminate?
多出的一个蒸饺给谁?
And who gets the extra dumpling?
可以切成三份
We could cut it into thirds.
那就不是饺子了
Then it's no longer a dumpling.
切开以后就是微型开口三明治了
Once you cut it open it is,at best,a very small open-faced sandwich.
你们好
Hi,fellas.
那个自以为会说普通话的人没来?
Oh,where's your annoying little friend who thinks he speaks mandarin?
他把自己的利益置于集体利益之前
He's putting his needs ahead of the collective good.
在这位老兄的家乡 那可是死罪
Where he comes from,that's punishable by death.
我是萨克拉门托人
I come from sacramento.
可不可以只要三个蒸饺?
Can we get an order of dumplings but with three instead of four?
不可替换
No substitutions.
这不是替换 是减量
This isn't a substitution. It's a reduction.
- 好吧 不准减量 - 行
- Okay.No reductions. - Fine.
那我们要三笼蒸饺
Uh,bring us three orders of dumplings.
一共十二个 每人四个
That's 12. We'll each have four.
可以
That works.
不行 如果吃饺子吃饱了 就要再减一道菜
No. If we fill up on dumplings,we need to eliminate another entree.
不准减菜
No eliminations.