谢尔顿和拉蒙娜

考虑加入实验物理学行业的同学们
So you are considering going into experimental physics,
我的大门永远向你们敞开
My door is always open.
另外我要再次道歉 可能我的实验不怎么成功
Once again, I'm sorry that the demonstration didn't quite work out,
但我们现在知道 你不小心把斯奈普桃汁
But now we know what happens when you accidentally spill
掉进氦氖激光器的时候会发生什么了
Peach snapple into a helium neon laser.
简单来说就是 别这么干
Short answer is... don't.
现在我们来介绍一下理论物理系
And now to tell you about the theoretical physics department
有请谢尔顿·库珀博士
Is dr. sheldon cooper.
库珀博士
Dr. cooper?
别叫我
Forget it.
稍等
Excuse me.
谢尔顿 我们都商量好了
Sheldon, we both agreed to do this.
别浪费时间
It's a waste of time.
我还不如给一群拉布拉多狗
I might as well explain the laws of thermodynamics
讲讲热力学定律呢
To a bunch of labradoodles.
你再不出来 我就不带你去动漫书店
If you don't do this, i won't take you to the comic book store.
你们好
Hello.
顺便说一句 你的激光器不错
Nice work with the laser, by the way.
看见你们朝气蓬勃的脸庞
Looking out at your fresh young faces,
我回想起了我决定步入学术道路的那一刻
I remember when I too was deciding my academic future
那时我还是个卑微的研究生
As a lowly graduate student.
忘了说 我14岁
Of course, I was 14.
不过我已经取得了你们大多数人
And I'd already achieved more than most of you
望尘莫及的成就 虽然我九点上床
Could ever hope to, despite my 9:00 bedtime.
现在 这个屋子里可能有一两个人
Now, there may be one or two of you in this room
具备学好理论物理学的基本素质
Who has what it takes to succeed in theoretical physics.
即使可能你们学成了之后
Although, it's more likely that you'll spend
只是拿来教五年级的小学生
Your scientific careers teaching fifth graders
要做一个纸壳模型火山
How to make papier mache volcanoes
要怎么使用碳酸氢钠火山岩
with baking soda lava.
感谢老天
Oh, good god.
简单来说
In short--
如果谁告诉你们你们有朝一日
Any one who told you that you would someday be able
能在物理学上有所建树
To make any significant contribution to physics,
那完全是个残忍的笑话 太残忍了
Played a cruel trick on you, a cruel trick indeed.
有问题吗
Any questions?
当然没有
Of course not.
我为科学的未来流泪
I weep for the future of science.
现在请允许我失陪了 新一期蝙蝠侠出版了
Now if you'll excuse me, the latest issue of batman is out.
走吧 莱纳德
Come, leonard.
现在看来 那个激光器实验还不错吧
Laser demonstration's looking pretty good now, huh?
我喜欢每年的这个时候
I love this time of the year.
落叶漫天飞舞 秋高气爽
The leaves are turning, there's a bracing chill in the air.
还有 校园里一整群女生
Plus there's a whole new crop of female grad students
开始长刚刚好的秋膘
About to put on just enough winter weight
让她们看起来既寒酸又易推倒
To make them needy and vulnerable.
就是这样 宝贝 再来一份奶酪饼
That's right, honey, have another calzone.
爸爸等着你
Daddy can wait.
大学里没有规定 不能和研究生约会吗
Isn't there a university policy against dating graduate students?
没有 只要你搭得上讪 你就可以约一个
No, if you can talk to them, you can ask them out.
妈的 陷阱真是无处不在
Damn, there's always a catch.
你们好
Hey, guys.
你好 莱斯利
Hey, leslie.
傻蛋 我听说你昨晚把一个研究生恶心吐了
So, dumbass, I heard you made a grad student throw up last night.
事实才是伸到那些喜欢道听途说者的嗓子眼里
The truth can indeed be a finger down the throat
让你呕吐的那根手指头
Of those unprepared to hear it.
不过我♥干嘛要跟二流智商的人解释这些呢
But why should I cater to second-rate minds?
因为一流智商的人叫你傻蛋
Because first-rate minds call you "dumbass"?
是吗 噢
Oh, yeah? well...
你这个人真刻薄
You're a mean person.
打扰了 库珀博士
Excuse me, dr. cooper,
我是拉蒙娜·诺维茨基
I'm ramona nowitzki.
我昨晚上旁听了你的讲话
I was at your talk last night.
我觉得你实在是个天才
I think you're just brilliant.
大家都这么认为
That is the prevailing opinion.
我现在确实要吐了
Oh, now I'm gonna throw up.
霍华德·沃罗威茨 工程系
Howard wolowitz, department of engineering,
国际空间站废液处理系统的 设计师之一
Co-designer of the international space station's liquid waste disposal system.
没兴趣
Ew.
库珀博士 你发表的每一篇文章我都读过
Dr. cooper, I've read everything you've published.
我尤其赞成你那篇如何取得
I especially liked your paper on grand unification
线形网状聚合物的大统一理论的论文
Using string-network condensates
我很好奇你是怎么发现
And were wondering how you determined
三维线形网能够形成一张图
That three-dimensional string-nets provided
同时涵盖费米子 和定量波色子的
A unified picture of fermions and gauge bosons?
奇迹啊 一只有智慧的拉布拉多犬
Amazing, an intelligent labradoodle.
你可以叫我伍夫
Woof.
事实是我马上就能突破
The fact is I'm quite close to a breakthrough
中微子如何从线形网聚合物中显形 这一难题了
In showing how neutrinos emerge from a string-net condensate.
天啊 那我们看物理学宇宙的方式 就彻底改变了
Oh, my god, that would change the way we view the entire physical universe.
我就是在做这个
It's what I do.
其实 我们的平斯金-沃罗威茨 废液处理系统
You know, the pishkin-wolowitz liquid waste disposal system
也震动了一些人
Is turning a few heads as well.
再说一次 没兴趣
Again, ew.
我还想听听 你打算如何增加中微子
You know, I'd love to hear more about how you intend to add neutrinos.
我们什么时候一起喝杯咖啡好吗
Could we get a cup of coffee sometime?
我不喝咖啡
I don't drink coffee.
我喝 爱我 就请我喝一杯乔
I do. I love me a cup of joe.
那 不一定要喝咖啡
Well, it doesn't have to be coffee.
晚餐好嘛
How about dinner?
我是得吃晚餐
I do eat dinner.
好极了 我知道一家非常棒的意大利小餐馆
Great. I know a terrific little italian place.
我不在奇怪的餐馆吃饭
I never eat in strange restaurants.
受不合格的餐具危害生命
One runs the risk of non-standard cutlery.
你确定
Excuse me?
谢尔顿惧怕三尖叉子
Sheldon lives in fear of the three-tined fork.
三尖的不是叉子
Three tines is not a fork.
三尖的是三叉戟
Three tines is a trident.
叉子 可以用来吃饭
Forks are for eating,
三叉戟 只能治理七大洋[海神波塞冬的象征物和武器]
Tridents are for ruling the seven seas.
那我打包带到你家吃怎么样
What if I brought food to your place?
这还差不多
That would be acceptable.
星期一 我吃泰国菜
On mondays, I eat thai food.
泰式炒面和沙茶鸡
Mee krob and chicken sate
多来点暹罗的花生酱
With extra peanut sauce from siam palace.
好吧
You got it.
我知道你住在哪
I already have your address.
真是个好姑娘
What a nice girl.
谢尔顿 你知道刚才发生什么了吗
Sheldon, do you have any idea what just happened?
当然 很明显我有免♥费的晚餐吃了
Yes. apparently I'm getting a free dinner.
别试了 这东西大概是坏了
Oh, yeah, no, this thing's majorly out of order.
-看 -不好意思
- See? - sorry.
没什么
That's okay.
看来得走楼梯了
Guess I'm taking the stairs.
你到哪间
Where you going?
4楼a
4-a.
你是要去找莱纳德吧
Oh, are you here to see leonard?
不是 库珀博士
No, dr. cooper.
谢尔顿·库珀博士
Dr. sheldon cooper?
我们一起吃晚饭
We're having dinner.
谢尔顿·库珀
Sheldon cooper?
高高瘦瘦的
Tall, thin,
看着像只正在祈祷的大螳螂的那个?
Looks a little like a giant praying mantis?
他很可爱 不是么
He is cute, isn't he?
谢尔顿·库珀
Sheldon cooper?
嗨 莱纳德
Hi, leonard.
嗨 拉蒙娜 请进
Hey, ramona. come on in.
我该把吃的放哪
Thanks. where should I put this?
搁灶台上就行
Uh, the kitchen's fine.