It took me nearly 20 minutes to go through the browser
History on your computer to see what movie times you looked up.
Wait here, I'll find us seats.
Uh, no, we have seats.
Not the right seats.
What is he doing?
He's finding the acoustic sweet spot.
Does he always do this?
Sometimes he brings a toy xylophone.
I am really sorry about this.
不会 还好啦 他挺可爱的
No, it's fine. you know, he's sweet.
My apologies, you've been sitting in it all along.
Leonard, you want to slide over one?
No, just sit here.
Oh, yeah, this is it.
咋啦 谢尔顿 咋啦 谢尔顿
What, sheldon?! what, sheldon?!
Tell me what you see here.
The blunt instrument that will be the focus of my murder trial?
This is stephanie's facebook page.
你看 本来应该是"交往中"的 她写的是什么
Now, where it should say "in a relationship," what does it say?
"stephanie barnett is single."
Yeah, furthermore, earlier this evening,
She threw a digital sheep at some guy named mike.
Why does he get a digital sheep and not you?
It's just her facebook page and we've
Only been going out a couple of weeks.
You don't see it, do you?
We're losing her.
Okay, I'm going to make this very simple for you.
You are not in this relationship.
Ergo, you have no say in anything
that happens between me and stephanie.
I'm afraid I can't allow that.
Pursuant to starfleet general order 104 section a,
You are deemed unfit and I hereby relieve you of your command.
General order 104, section a does not apply in this situation.
Give me one good reason why not.
Because this is not startrek
This is banana bread.
This is a door knob.
It's my understanding that an unsolicited gift of food can
Be a precursor to an impromptu invitation to come in and chat.
Sheldon, would you like to come in?
I suppose I could spare a few minutes.
Were you robbed?
How can you be sure?
Sheldon, what do you want?
I'm certain this will come as no surprise to you,
But leonard is failing in yet another relationship.
He's having problems with stephanie?
She's sending virtual livestock to random men on the internet.
If I have any hope of keeping them together, I need data.
I need to know exactly what leonard did that
Caused you to pop an emotional cap in his buttocks.
Again, urban slang.
In which, I believe I'm gaining remarkable fluency.
So, what is the "down" and the "low"?
And don't worry, this is all entirely confidential, so,
You feel free to include any and all shortcomings in the bedroom.
We never got to the bedroom.
Oh, okay, all right, you know what?
I'll tell you what happened.
We were young, we were very much in love,
But we could only communicate through a
Time-traveling mailbox at my lake house.
It's not enough that you made me watch that movie,
But now you mock me with it?
Gentlemen, I have a question about dating and relationships.
You told me you were going to have the talk with him.
I've been waiting for someone to have the talk with me.
More to the point,
It's about finding a way to keep leonard and stephanie together.
Oh, I don't think you can.
Well, why not?
Look at leonard's record.
27 days with joyce kim.
During which she defected to north korea.
Two booty calls with leslie winkle.
For which she awarded him the nickname "speed of light leonard."
And the three hour dinner with penny.
Which would have been two and a half if
They ordered the souffle when they sat down.
Based on the geometric progression,
His relationship with stephanie
should have ended after 20 minutes.
Yes, I'm aware of the math.
Y equals 27 days over 12 to the nth.
The issue remains.
How do we circumvent his inevitable rejection?
Well, if you want to guarantee his appeal to stephanie,
Your best bet would be to kill all the other men on the planet.
I'll tell you what you shouldn't do.
Don't shpritz him with that body spray from the
Commercial where the women undress when they smell it.
That doesn't work at all.
No matter how much you put on.
So, that's all you've got?
Apocalyptic genocide and "go easy on the cologne"?
Oh, thank you.
May I come in?
My earlier inquiry regarding
you and leonard crossed some sort of line.
Well, thank you.
So, have you and I returned to a social equilibrium?
Where are you in your menstrual cycle?