生活大爆炸第二季第九集part3

The Big Bang Theory S02E09

.

2019年9月12日 04:40

我在网上做了些调查
I've been doing some research online,
显然灵长目雌性
and apparently female primates,
猿黑猩猩你们
You know, uh, apes, chimpanzees, you.
她们觉得她们的配偶
They find their mate more desirable
被另一个雌性追求时更有吸引力
When he's being courted by another female.
当竞争的雌性在排卵期
Now, This effect is intensified when the rival female
分泌激素时这种效果更强烈
Is secreting the pheromones associated with ovulation.
这又回到我最初的问题
Which brings me back to my question.
你在...
Where are you in your--
很显然我早来了14天
Clearly, I'm 14 days too early.
我是说要是能治疗黄热病和疟疾
All I'm saying is if they can cure yellow fever and malaria,
为何不能治乳糖不耐症
Why can't they do something about lactose intolerance?
莱纳德撒手别想了
Leonard, you're going to have to let this go.
你吃点乳酪就放屁
You had a little cheese dip, you farted.
我觉得很可爱
I thought it was cute.
斯蒂芬妮
Oh, hi, stephanie.
再来点红酒
Wanna more wine?
好的反正我今晚又不开车去哪
Yeah, I'm not driving anywhere tonight.
你在干什么
What are you doing?
我特别想吃白芦笋
I have a craving for white asparagus
但显然未能如愿
That apparently is destined to go unsatisfied.
失陪一下
Excuse me.
你到底怎么了
What the hell is wrong with you?
我在帮你留住斯蒂芬妮
I'm helping you with stephanie.
通过像便秘的驼鹿一样叫唤
By making constipated moose sounds?
当我没打开这瓶盖而你打开了
When I fail to open this jar and you succeed,
这样你就像个男子汉
It will establish you as the "alpha" male.
你知道吗
You see...
当女性看到你在展示力量时
When a female witnesses an exhibition of physical domination,
她会产生荷尔蒙催产素
She produces the hormone oxytocin.
之后如果你们俩交往的话
If the two of you then engage in intercourse,
它会在大脑促生生物化学反应
This will create the biochemical reaction in the brain
让人们想当然地以为自己陷入爱河
Which lay people naively interpret as "falling in love."
那我给你脸一拳管用吗
Would it work if I just punched you in the face?
当然可以但还是让我们看看这个行吗
Yes, actually it would, but let's see how the lid goes.
莱纳德我不够强壮还是你来吧
I'm not strong enough, leonard, you'll have to do it.
看在上帝的份上
Oh, for god's sakes.
开吧已经松动了
Go ahead, it's pre-loosened.
需要帮助吗
Do you want some help with that?
不要不要我能搞定
No, no, no, I got it.
没错没错他能搞定这不足为奇
No, yeah, yeah, he's got it, and that's not surprising.
很久以前当我陷入爱河的时候
This is something I long ago came to
我是可以打开的
Peace with in my role as the beta male.
快开
Open it.
-天呢你还好吗 -我不好
- Oh, my god, are you okay? - no, I'm not.
流血了
I'm bleeding.
像个角斗士一样
Like a gladiator!
你得缝几针
Oh, honey, you're going to need stitches.
缝几针用针缝吗
Stitches? with a needle?
对就几针
Well, yeah, I mean, just a few.
好的稍等一下
Oh, okay, yeah, hang on a sec.
顺便一提我正在那解冻牛排呢
Fyi, I was defrosting a steak in there.
斯蒂芬尼缝得可真漂亮
What a beautiful job stephanie did.
我会用床垫缝纫法
I might have gone with a mattress suture
而不会用毯边锁缝纫法
instead of a blanket stitch,
但她缝成这样你也只能认了
But you can't argue with her results.
没留伤疤真是太可惜了
It's a shame it won't scar.
战伤可是古时男子汉的荣誉徽章
The war wound is a time-honored badge of masculinity.
你什么时候能安静一会
I can't remember a time when you weren't talking.
言归正传
Just for the record,
我费心费力把你打造成男子汉
My efforts to establish you as the alpha
你这么痛哭流涕可没啥帮助
Male were not aided by you bursting into tears.
我没痛哭流涕只是眼睛湿润了一下而已
I did not burst into tears, my eyes just got a little watery.
湿润了一下
Watery?
她用针♥刺我的手
She stuck a needle into my hand!
我的小泪孩怎么样了
Hey, how's my big cry baby?
我没哭
I didn't cry.
好吧我只是在逗你
Okay, I'm just teasing you.
不过你确实哭了
But, yeah, you did.
好的没问题了
Okay, it's all good.
我们送你回家扶你上床怎么样
What do you say we get you home and put you to bed?
那你还在那过夜吗
Oh, are you still going to spend the night?
不行我想你需要休息
Uh, no, I think that you probably need to rest.
她说得对你呕吐的时候
She's right. as long as you're vomiting,
交媾是禁忌的
coitus is contra-indicated.
谢谢你库珀博士
Thank you, dr. cooper.
言重了霍夫斯塔德博士
You're welcome, dr. hofstadter.
好吧我去拿你的出院单
Okay, I'm going to go get your discharge papers.
怎么了
What?
你就像只可爱至极的小鸟
Well, you seem like a perfectly pleasant person.
我真不明白为什么你那么不招女人待见呢
I can't understand why women have such a hard time loving you.
能替我打开吗
Hey, can you open this for me?
我能看你的缝针吗
Can I see your stitches?
可以
Sure.
终于明白为什么
Answering the question once and for all
沃罗威茨会退出医学院了
Why wolowitz bailed out of medical school.
莱纳德可喜可贺啊
Leonard, congratulations.
为啥
What for?
你在facebook里的资料更新了
Your facebook status update.
莱纳德·霍夫斯塔德恋爱了
Leonard hofstadter is "in a relationship."
什么不对这不对
What? no. no, that's not right.
伙计在她更新前你就更新你的了
Oh, man, did you switch your status before she did?
以我专业人士的眼光来看真是饥不择食啊
Speaking as an expert, way to look needy.
动真格的吗
Seriously?
才两周你就先表白了
You went first, after only two weeks?
真是有胆
That's bold...
这不是有胆这是个误会
It's not bold, it's a mistake.
我没更新我的资料
I didn't change my status.
那是谁干的
Well, then who did?
我别无选择他都在人家面前哭了
I had no choice. he cried in front of her.
你侵入了我在facebook里的账户
You hacked my facebook account?
这算不上侵入
Oh, it's hardly hacking
做什么你都用这个密码
when you use the same password for everything,
卡尔-艾尔[就是超人]
"kal-el."
你疯了吗
Are you insane?
她现在会以为我是没人要的
Now she's going to think I'm desperate.
你毁了我们的关系
You've destroyed this relationship!
你知道最糟糕的是什么吗
And you want to know what the worst part is?
你根本不知道自己哪里做错了因为你
You don't even understand what you did wrong because you
自以为在任何方面你都是专家
Can't conceive of something that you are not an expert in!
在那方面我不是
In which I am not an expert.
不要说话
Don't even!
我一个字都不想听
I don't want to hear another word out of you.
怎么了莱西蒂米掉到井里了吗[《灵犬莱西》里情节]
What's wrong, lassie? timmy fall down the well?
她也更新了自己在facebook里的资料
She just updated her facebook status.
斯蒂芬尼·巴内特和莱纳德·霍夫斯塔德
"stephanie barnett is in a relationship
相恋了
with leonard hofstadter."
真的吗
Really?
瞧瞧这个
Oh, look at that.
我有女友了
I have a girlfriend.
容许我再说一句
If I am permitted to speak again,
谢尔顿·库珀博士:为胜利而生
dr. sheldon cooper for the win.