and, uh... I-I respect that.
She did not leave you because Phil died.
She left you because you're a pussy.
Please don't use a bad word when you can use a good word.
Fine. You're a vagina.
Ah, the P.
I just got the P in P-Hound.
It means pussy... pussy.
我觉得你... 错把好心肠当成好欺负了 威尔
I think you're... mistaking kindness for weakness, Will.
I'm gonna go the other way now.
I want you to donate those clothes
like you said you would.
And I want you to come to dinner
with your auntie and your grandpa at my place.
I don't want you to forget you have a family.
Oh, and don't try to teach me things,
and, like, don't ever stare at me like that again.
I'm not that word.
I'm not the P word.
And change your outfit.
You look like Rosa Parks' bus driver.
I'll see you at dinner.
That was an excellent historical reference.
I'd like to point out
to the committee that sometimes...
Mom, Dad's on TV again.
Well, that's sort of his job, Will.
-蠢材 -闭嘴 菲尔
- Idiot. - Shut up, Phil.
Stop it, Phil!
♪ 耶稣基♥督♥ ♪
♪ Jesus Christ ♪
♪ 汝为何者 为何献身 ♪
♪ Who are you? What have you sacrificed? ♪
♪ 耶稣基♥督♥... ♪
♪ Jesus Christ... ♪
Stop it. I'm trying to watch Dad on the news.
Well, your father is an impressive man.
She means boring.
♪ 耶稣基♥督♥ ♪
♪ Jesus Christ ♪
-♪ 超级巨星 ♪ -嘿 你够了
- ♪ Superstar ♪ - Hey, quit it.
菲尔 不管你在做什么 都赶紧住手
Phil, whatever you're doing, stop it, please.
You're on my brother's grave.
Can you smoke somewhere else?
I guess, but...
I've been geeking out here since I was 12, man.
This is especially hallowed ground.
Can you move away from that headstone?
I can't really move anywhere right now.
What are you gonna do with that?
Bring him back to life?
It was his. He wanted to be a magician.
- We both did. - Why?
There's a lot of cool things you can do
when you have an identical twin.
It's pretty neat, actually.
Can I see that?
- Psh! - What are you doing?
Trying to make the lamps explode, but...
-我觉得它坏掉了 -好吧 快给我滚蛋吧
- I think it's broken. - Okay, get the fuck off now.
伙计 淡定点 咱们好好相处怎么样
Dude, chill. Can't we all just get along?
For the sake of, like,
the world and its greater evils?
Well, hello there, Soap Scum.
Oh, be careful.
I don't want you to stain my sweet new purple threads.
Purple's a girl's color, Mr. Pickles.
Purple is the...
color of kings.
But you're not a king, Mr. Pickles.
No, but I'm a daddy,
and a daddy is like the king of the household.
And mommy is like the queen.
What? I had a soccer game.
What's going on with Maddy?
She wouldn't eat her broccoli,
so I gave her BO [body odor].
Early puberty's kicking her A [ass].
How did you give her body odor?
By starving her of basic hygiene.
Did you read that in a book somewhere?
Will is turning into Phil.
该死的孩子们 抱歉 是要命的
Fucking kids. Sorry. Friggin'.
You think I'm a pussy?
Snagglehorse smells like he's been ridden hard
- and put away wet. - We're not having sex
- in the horse. - We've only been in it
for five minutes.
That's my daughter.
You're smelling her.
I'm not going to ask.
I hate you.
I need to show my family I'm feeling what they're feeling.
We're swimming with stones in our pockets.
We need to take them out, or we'll never get back
to the surface again.
Is this all about Jill?
She tattooed Phil's name on her left breast.
Every woman deserves to feel sexy.
Two months after the accident,
I left a conversation
about whether or not we should even celebrate Christmas
to go on TV, light the national tree,
and wish America yule tidings.
- How does that make her feel? - Like you're a man.
And if she's holding that over your head, it's her problem.
Real women don't want to see your cry face.
They want concrete arms and a warm touch
You do a show about death,
children will run from the room in tears.
Bring in a live audience.
Do it now.
It's a bad idea. You'll traumatize the kids.
Are you gonna hit me?
Why would I want to hit you?
sometimes when we think we're opening up,
we're actually falling apart.
Will you please marinate on that?