I had a dream.
I know how you're gonna die.
什么 怎么了 怎么了
What's -- What's happening? What's happening?
She just said she knows how I'm gonna die.
Do we have life insurance?
Can I have my iPad?
I want to look at pictures of mummies.
Go to bed!
Can I at least have a Popsicle?
-不行 不行 -不行
- Uh, no? No! - ?No.
If you wake your sister, no more "National Geographic for Kids."
Bill, did you just threaten to punish her
by taking away geography?
And I'll do it, too.
Her obsession with Ancient Egypt is very weird.
I love her, but she is just strange.
You know, she names all her bananas
and then does their screams while she eats them.
Are we bad parents?
She has zero friends.
You know, I wish she could just make one.
Must be why her teacher's making us come in for this conference.
没错 肯定是坏消息 对吧
Yeah, it's gotta be bad news, right?
Or else the teacher would just text us.
It's like, why don't people just text bad news?
Yeah, what, do you want to stare at us while we get bad news?
I mean, t-that's psycho.
Our daughter's insane, and the teacher's psycho.
我们弄明白了 不错的凌晨两点聊天 亲爱的
Well, we figured it out. Great 2:00 a.m. talk, sweetie.
And she woke the baby.
Okay, that's it! No more Egypt!
I hate the sunrise.
Yeah, me, too.
I'm already exhausted, and nothing's even happened yet.
Hey, look at this Facebook reminder.
10 years ago today -- whitewater rafting in Belize.
Wait, who's that guy you're kissing?
Wow! I have so much hair.
But this is better.
嗯 嗯 绝对地
Oh, yeah, yeah, definitely.
My birthday party.
Yeah? You better leave room for your friends.
No, I'm done.
Good morning, my angels.
-早 妈妈 -早
- Good morning, Mom. - Morning.
My medications are interacting with each other
in a very pleasant way this morning.
-吃吧 宝贝们 -好吃
- Here you go, kids. - Yummy!
Or -- Or maybe they'd like some of my bran cereal.
-拜托 别又提起这个 我受不了 -上帝赐我力量
- Please, not this again. I can't. - Give me strength, Jesus.
I'm sorry, but, like all Americans,
these kids need more fiber.
What are they? 50-year-old cops? They'll be fine.
Oh, you laugh, but if you don't eat enough fiber,
I know how you're gonna die.
听着 妈 如果我们给她们麦麸麦片 她们不会吃的
Look, Mom, if we give them bran, they won't eat it, okay?
Are we just going to let her throw her cereal?
Yes, that's -- that's what 2-year-olds do.
But they might not,
if we team up together to establish consequences.
Like how you used to threaten to take my dog away?
Exactly! That worked!
what's your generation's enlightened way of stopping the bran bandit?
Here you go, sweetie.
Grandma can't take you away.
Prepare to be e-mailed several articles.
Hey, remember when my mom moved in with us two years ago
because she was sick?
Then she got better and never left?
It was the worst miracle.
Honey, I love her,
but we cannot let her negativity get to us.
No, no, don't worry.
We will never treat the kids the way she treats us, okay?
Look, let-- let's just make a conscious decision to be positive, huh?
You know what? I like it.
How about this -- how about we both say something
-我们心存感激的事 好吗 -好
- that we're grateful for, okay? - ?Okay.
-我爱你 -我爱丹 那个给我们修剪树的人
- I love yo-- - ?I love Dan, the guy who trims our trees.
Yeah, he's good.
给 宝贝 我去给你拿书包
Okay. Here you are, kiddo. Let me grab your backpack.
Oh, Bill, did you get her lunch?
嗯嗯 拿了 拿了
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Bill, I don't remember
rushing around like this when I was raising you.
I guess I was organized.
Hey, babe, is this a leak?
You know, I did not marry a contractor to live like this.
We gotta hide that bucket. Chuy's coming over.
Because I couldn't get any
of my other brothers to drive me to work.
拜托 别让他进屋 好吗
Oh, come on. Don't let him in the house, okay?
I can't deal with his upbeat negativity.
He really is caring and helpful...
and annoying and so freakin' awful.
I love him.
That lines up.
Crap. He's in the driveway.
Oh, just go. Just go. Get out the door.
- Don't worry about -- -- Okay.
你好吗 大舅子 很高兴见到你 小丘
What's going on there, bud? Good to see you, Chu.
I know you guys are too proud to ask for help,
美剧 | 多元一家人（2020） | 导航列表