Ryan always used to say, "This is Tony, my boyfriend."
Like I was some sort of possession.
I get it.
But I'm not Ryan.
I'm not gonna judge you, but you have to tell me what's going on.
Or I can't be your friend or boyfriend or anything.
I had a friend.
Her name was Hannah.
She killed herself.
She left a job for me.
Secrets to keep.
I tried, I tried to honor her memory.
I tried to keep those secrets,
but I don't think I did the right thing.
Her parents are hurting.
I don't know what I'm supposed to do.
I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I just...
- I wanted to take care of Hannah. - Come here.
You lost it?
Are you sure you didn't drop it or something?
I looked everywhere.
I retraced my steps. But someone must have taken it.
Well, generally that's what people do, Hannah,
when they find a bag full of cash laying on the street.
I'm so sorry, okay?
I just convinced the landlord
to work with us to pay the back rent.
I don't even, I don't know what to say.
See, right now. I thought you were more responsible than this.
-我们信任了你 -亲爱的 就是几百块钱
- We trusted you! - Honey, it's a few hundred dollars.
You can have my last check from the Crestmont.
I have $200 in the bank.
I can start babysitting on the weekend.
Hannah... it's fine.
It seemed like no matter what I did, I kept letting people down.
I started thinking how everyone's lives
would be better without me.
And what does that feel like?
It feels like nothing.
就像一个深邃 无尽 空白的虚无
Like a deep, endless, always blank nothing.
And for those of you
who will now be looking for signs everywhere...
what does it really look like?
Hannah, you still up?
Yeah, I couldn't sleep.
Here's the scary thing.
I'm gonna take a walk.
Okay. Don't be out too late.
Take your jacket. Cause it's starting to get cold out.
It looks like nothing.
It wasn't a short walk.
I walked forever that night.
Through my old neighborhood, where the houses were nicer
than the one we lived in now.
All the way up to the hill where the rich people live.
Where you live.
And from blocks away, I heard it.
The murmur of voices.
The siren call of a party.
You'd think I'd know better than to follow that call
after Jessica's party.
But my feet followed it.
My mind and heart were still in the big, blank nothing.
Jensen. The fuck do you want?
Listen, I was wondering...
if... I mean, I was hoping you wouldn't mind...
Look, I know it's weird, but I was hoping to buy some weed.
It's kind of an emergency.
You want to buy some weed. From me.
Yes, I do.
If you wouldn't mind.
Why would I mind?
Come on in.
So you need some weed, huh?
Yeah, um, I do.
'Cause you got yours confiscated the other day.
-你听说了 -是啊 大家都听说了
- You heard about that? - Yeah, everybody did.
Any time one of the squeaky clean kids gets dirty,
it's pretty big news.
So listen, I'm gonna hook you up this time 'cause you seem desperate,
and I happen to have shit on hand right now.
And, you know, 420 brotherhood.
But I'm not a dealer, okay?
So, if you need like a regular thing, I can hook you up with my guy.
You keep it on the coffee table?
Yeah, my parents are in Ibiza. They won't be back for a week.
So, what do you want? Like, an eighth?
Indica or sativa?
Hybrid. I concur.
Gotta say, man, I did not take you for a stoner.
I guess you never know
what's going on in someone else's life, right?
I bet you have some great parties out here, huh?
I am starving! Can you please grab me a slice of pizza?
Hannah! Hannah Baker!
Can you do me a huge favor and grab me a slice of pepperoni?
Hannah! Me too!
Get me, like, two slices.
I was surprised to see Jessica at another party.
Hannah Baker's here to save the day!
Baker Pizza at your service.
My God, you are amazing.
But then, I was surprised to see myself at another party.
Yes, thank you, Hannah!
You're gonna get pizza grease in the water.
Think of it as a moisturizing spa treatment.
I read that pepperoni oil reduces cellulite.
I actually read that too,
except it only works when it's mixed with cheese.
And tomato sauce.
Have you been here all night?
No, I just got here.
Just when everyone's leaving.
I'm not going anywhere.
Yeah. This party is far from over.
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