Holidays in our family were a little unique,
mostly because my mom was able to insert Jesus
into all of them.
Anyone could do it for Christmas and Easter,
but my mom really had game.
You know what's even brighter than those sparklers?
The light of Christ.
But St. Patrick's Day was different
because it was all about fun.
And the center of our fun was The O'Neal family float
in our neighborhood St. Patrick's Day parade.
Hey, guys, come on! Ha-ha!
Here she is!
Well, I think last year we literally rode her hard
and put her away wet.
Yeah, she could use some sprucing up.
And this year, in light of recent events,
I think we'll ditch the rainbow.
But I'll never turn down a trip to Felicia's Fabrics.
Guys, look what I found!
It's our St. Paddy's Day costumes!
My little leprechaun.
I'd pop that in the microwave before you try it on
'cause I think that's black mold.
Is it just me, or is puffy paint
getting less and less puffy every year?
No, it's not just you.
我是说 如果只能画画 那它存在的意义在哪?
I mean, at what point is it just paint?
Do you know that the bows you just bought
were made by small Cambodian children?
Well, when you do something a thousand times a day,
you get pretty good at it.
妈! 我... 我很抱歉
Mom! I... I'm sorry.
My mother doesn't like to be confronted in parking lots.
It'll only take a minute.
I... I'm seeking signatures for a petition to end child labor.
Oh, of course.
I love labor and I hate children.
- 我再说什么? - 不不不 抱歉
- What? - No, no, no, I'm sorry.
No, you can't sign that.
You're not old enough to... Vote or sign things.
I'll do it.
How old are you?
Uh, I'm... I'm 16.
我17 你好 我是瑞奇
17. Hi, I'm Ricky.
At that moment, I hated my name.
It sounded like the name a baby.
Sometimes people call me Kenneth.
妙手回春啊! 哇喔! 我太能了
Saved it! Whew! Look at me.
I'm flirting with a guy, and I am crushing it.
Come on, Kenneth. It's time for your bath.
I haven't taken a bath since I was 3.
Or, you know, unless my muscles are sore from working out.
Okay, gotta go.
我跟你说呀 吉米 这个男的简直太可爱了
Oh, Jimmy, this guy was so cute.
But I couldn't tell if he was flirting, or even gay.
I assumed I'd be able to tell if another guy was gay.
The way vampires know.
There is a way to find out.
Well, this is the advice I need.
你就只要走过去直接问就好啦 "大兄弟 你是弯的么?"
You just walk up to him and you say, "You gay, bro?"
No, this is not the advice I need.
Advice about what?
It occurs to me that with all the hubbub
and excitement about St. Patrick's Day
that we've gotten distracted
from what's really important about this time of year...
She finally did it.
She managed to bring Jesus into St. Patrick's Day.
Seriously, I have to work on St. Patrick's Day, too?
I was supposed to go to sandals with Buddha and Vishnu.
- 抱歉 - 四月斋是每年
- Sorry. - Lent is the time of year
when we are supposed to atone for our sins.
This family's got plenty to atone for.
We all gave up stuff already.
Yeah, I gave up girls.
I gave up novel-reading.
I gave up crossfit.
I gave up a Zac Efron movie in which he plays a deejay.
None of these things are real.
Oh, I thought so, too, but I saw the trailer.
We should be giving up things
that are keeping us from being better people.
所以 吉米 你需要戒掉自己长时间的"淋浴"
So, Jimmy, you need to give up your long "Showers."
Everyone knows what you're doing in there.
What? I'm not...
I don't... what...
我... 我... 我洗头很费时间的 老妈
I... I... it takes a long time for me to shampoo my hair, Mom.
Fine. No long showers.
Shannon, you're giving up your phone.
- 莎伦! - 我戒掉健身了
- Shannon! - I gave up crossfit.
Pat, I need you to give up calling me every time
there's something you can't figure out in the basement.
- 我什么时候那样过? - 今天早上就是
- When have I done that? - Just this morning.
But I couldn't figure out how to turn off the dryer.
- 它自己会停 - 怎么停?
- It just stops. - How?
- 事实就是如此 - 但是那又怎样?
- It just does. - But how?
- 别解释了 - 但是...
- It just does. - But...
Kenny, I'd like it if you gave up
being so sneaky and keeping so many secrets.
I heard you and Jimmy talking earlier,
and I know it wasn't about vampires.
But if we all have to give up stuff for lent,
I think you should have to give up something, too.
Okay, well, I think you should...
Give up being judgmental.
That's a dumb idea.
- 说的好! - 就这么做!
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