Come out, Kenny!
Yeah, Kenny. Why don't you come out?
I can't come out. Have you ever met my mom?
She put a statue of the virgin mary over the toilet
So we'd put the seat down.
No, but it will literally kill her.
I can't be gay ... ever.
I need to learn how to do it ... with a girl.
I can do this.
Do you have it on yet? Does it fit?
Nope. Can't do this.
That's a...bad idea, man.
I'm out of here.
等等! 不 不 不 先别走啊!
Wait! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!
Ohh! Oh, god.
拜托 圣母 帮帮我
Come on, girl. Help me out.
I finally got the bow right!
不管怎样 我们还是会出现在公告里的 对吧
We're still in the bulletin, though, right?
The good news is, almost everyone was blinded
by plaster dust and didn't see the condoms.
The bad news is
My mom was now convinced that I'd sinned with Mimi.
Where's our regular plumber?
I had to call in a stranger.
We need to keep this Kenny thing contained.
You know how gossipy plumbers are.
What do you think mom's gonna do to me?
What did Mimi do to you?
额 就是... 你懂得
Oh. Just ... you know,
Just...all that sex stuff that drives us wild.
Yeah! She did, man!
No matter what she tells you, you're not going to hell.
If everything she said was true,
I would be so blind by now.
Whoa! She looks pissed.
Just let me take the lead. Please?
Be my guest. Go right ahead.
Okay, so, some things happened last night
That I think we need to talk about.
You are in a heap of trouble, young man.
I know out in the rest of the world,
Kids are humping to hip-hop, but not in this house.
Father Phil was here ... in his collar!
I told Mimi that, but she was unmoved by that argument.
I have a lot more statues of the blessed virgin
你知道吗 肯尼 ... 很大的那种
In the basement, Kenny ... big ones.
Let me tell you how this ends.
- 来了 - 如果你让蜜蜜怀孕了
- Here it comes. - If you get Mimi pregnant,
Then you won't be able to go to Northwestern
And become the youngest judge in Illinois history,
Like we always talked about.
And I want that for you.
Because you're my favorite.
They're all my favorites.
嘿 朱迪 谢谢
Hey, Jodi. Thanks.
How's things after last night?
Things are good. Good.
Because I just got out of cardio salsa at the church,
And people were talking about Kenny and Mimi.
Guess who was yammering on the most.
Marcia bleeping Worthman.
Well, apparently, they found Mimi in her underwear
With hundreds of Kenny's condoms plugging their pipes.
Are you kidding?
No. Those moves are hard.
I think I pulled my vagina muscle.
Do women have groins?
This is nice.
Well, now everyone's gonna know.
We need to nip this in the bud.
I agree. So I was thinking ...
I have this cousin back in Philly
With a very questionable past who would do anything for me.
我说的 "任何事" 是指...
And by "Anything," I mean like...
"Kill Marcia Worthman."
Well, we're not gonna do that,
But I like that you're thinking.
- 能帮我把那个放到前面去么? -当然
- Can you put that in the front for me? - Yeah.
Hey. I'm gonna go watch the hockey game at Clifford's.
No. It's out there.
I need you to handle this Kenny thing
The way you handle things.
My dad's way of handling parenting stuff
Was to bring us to work.
He wants us to be responsible drivers,
He takes us to a crash site.
See that hand? It's still texting.
Hey, I got a bleeder!
Who wants ice cream?
Express it out of here!
He doesn't want me to have premarital sex?
He takes me to Crystal.
She was in the middle of telling me
Her sex-worker origin story,
And I have to admit ... I was zoning out,
Until I heard...
Why do you want to have sex with your girlfriend?
我是说 亲爱的 很明显 你是同志嘛
I mean, honey, clearly, you're gay.
你怎么... 你怎么... 你怎么会这么想? 什么?
Where ... where ... where are you getting that? What?
How's it going?
水晶姐 跟你聊的真好 谢谢了
Uh, thanks, Crystal. Good talk.
So that happened.
And then we went to bingo night,
Otherwise known as
"The night where my mom tries to make everyone forget
About the sex I didn't have with Mimi."
Okay. This is a big night.
And not just for me, but for our entire family.
I know we've had an eventful 24 hours,
But now we're over the hump.
你刚刚说了 "沟" 好好笑
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