Coming out at a catholic high school
was pretty scary,
but my school wanted me to feel more at home,
so they put together gay straight alliance,
which is, honestly, kind of great
because I've been wanting to find a place
where I can hang out with other kids like me.
He's here! He's queer!
Get used to it!
I was supposed to say that.
这就是 这就是 全部的人了么?
Is this...is this all...this is all of us?
Am I the only "G" In the gsa?
So far. Tell us everything.
When you're hooking up, what's second base?
Cause for us, it's boobs.
What's the gay version of boobs?
Um, excuse me... for a second.
I think I forgot my gay wallet.
I told you they had those!
How did you know that?
My mom says I have gay intuition.
Oh, my god!
While I've been trying to find people like me...
Ever since her divorce news broke,
my mom's been trying to avoid people like her.
I heard about you and Pat...
对不起 南希 我买♥♥了冰淇淋 没法聊天 再见!
Sorry, Nancy. Ice cream, can't talk. Bye!
- 你最近过得怎么样? - 对不起 苏西
- How are you? - Sorry, Suzie.
买♥♥了纸巾 没法聊天 再见!
Paper towels, can't talk. Bye!
- 艾琳? - 你好 玛西亚
- Eileen? - Hey, Marcia.
Can't talk. Bye!
Can we please stop shopping at the German market?
I mean, what is this stuff?
It's air-dried meat cured with white wine and seasonings.
I'm getting all meat and no wine off this thing.
When are you going back to the regular grocery store?
When those gossiping hens
stop staking me out in the parking lot.
Oh, I would so love...a rotisserie hen right now.
- 是的 我们看出来了 - 哦 不妙
- Yes, we see that. - Oh, no.
Aunt Jodi's having another one of her ambien blackouts.
Jodi, you're awake!
- 快醒醒! - 朱迪姨妈!
- You're awake! - Aunt Jodi!
No. I'm here for book club.
Oh, my gosh. That's today?
不 不 我们必须取消
Um, no. No, we have to cancel.
I can't face those women.
It's too late. They'll be here in 30 minutes.
I can't be ready by then!
I won't even be done chewing by then.
It takes 8 to 10 days
to get ready for a book-club meeting.
I have to clean the house, find all the right snacks...
冷饮 热饮 清口剂...
cold apps, hot apps, palate cleansers...
all wrapped up in a clever literary theme.
Oh, well, maybe today's theme could be "Panic and shame."
I have been avoiding these women,
trying not to talk about my problems,
but now these women are coming into my home.
How am I gonna not talk about my problems
when my problem's sitting right here?
Well, if you'd like, we could...
当然 请你们 快点消失
Yes, please. Don't be here.
我本来想说 "帮忙打扫" 不过我懂你的意思了
I was gonna say, "Help clean up," but message received.
You know, it's her subtlety that I appreciate.
- 我们也能走么? - 不行!
- Can we leave, too? - No!
You and Shannon have to stay here and help me with book club.
Of all times not to be gay or divorcing you.
Hey, dad, so, I was thinking,
since we have the day.
I am so sorry.
Are you alphabetizing three DVDs?
Yeah, okay. So, I've got "Evita," "Black Hawk Down,"
And "Salmon Fishing in the Yemen,"
But I can't decide if I want them
in ascending or descending order.
Actually, "Evita's" mine, but keep it.
I've got the blu-ray.
So, you know how,
whenever mom wants us out of the house,
we always go to Clifford's and we watch nascar?
Yeah. You want to go early?
Actually, uh, I was thinking
maybe we don't watch nascar, like, ever,
and by "We," I mean the human race.
Oh, I get it. I see what's happening.
Now that you're out,
you don't want to do any of the things
that you pretended to like before.
Uh-huh, like I stopped flossing post-divorce.
当然 不过我的决定 比较合理
Sure, except mine...is a reasonable...decision.
Anyway, uh, it's just that lately,
I've been feeling like everywhere I go,
I am the only gay person.
We can go to Albert's and watch monster trucks.
Yeah, no, you are driving the wrong way down the street.
Oh, I got it.
There's a coffee shop that I pass sometimes when I'm on patrol,
and it's not advertised as such,
but I think they may be known in some underground circles
as a gay coffee shop.
Do you mean the Rainbow Grind?
- 就是那家店 - 那家店 就是 同志咖啡店
- That's the one. - That is, like, the gay coffee shop!
I've been wanting to go there for a while.
You'd...really take me?
Of course I would.
现在 是我换衣服 还是你换衣服配我?
Now, should I change, or should we match?
Nah, maybe we shouldn't match, but it'd be fun to match.
I kind of love what I'm wearing, though.
Dad, have you never hung out with me before?
I'm sorry, son.
I'm just super excited
that a straight dad and a gay son can still bond...
Not that I was worried before because I was excited,
but now I'm excited even more.
We should go.
Now, look this isn't gonna be easy,
but the goal is to get through today
without having to dredge up
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