我们对这人了解多少
What exactly do we know about this guy?
他有台老式自动唱机想卖♥♥给我
That he has a vintage jukebox and wants to sell it to me.
这只是他在网上说的
Well, that's just what he said online.
如果我们大老远跑去里诺 却发现是骗局呢
What if we drove all the way to Reno and it's a total scam?
骗局的目的是什么
What exactly would the scam be?
让一对情侣无缘无故开三个小时车吗
To get a couple to drive three hours for no reason?
哈哈 我偷了你们的时间
"Ha, ha, I've stolen your time."
你真天真
You are so innocent.
我就像在和婴儿谈恋爱
It's like I'm in a relationship with a baby.
我们到那里 他们拿出自动唱机
We get there, they bring out the jukebox,
你给他们一袋钱
you give them a bag of money,
他们说 我们为你装箱
they say, "We'll box it up for you,"
他们抬上车 我们回家
they load it in the van, we get home,
发现箱子里全是砖头和沙子
the box is full of bricks and sand.
谁会这样做啊
Who would do that?
-不 -是的
- It... Oh, no. - u202dYeah.
我卖♥♥的是立体声喇叭
I did it with stereo speakers.
将同一对喇叭卖♥♥了78次
Sold the same pair 78 times.
它们现在在哪 在我们的卧室里
And where are they now? In our living room.
你吓到我了 我要娶一个吓到我的人
You scare me. I'm marrying someone who scares me.
每对夫妻中都要有一个可怕的人
Every couple needs at least one scary person.
周围的摩♥门♥教♥徒不敢敲我们家门
The neighborhood Mormons are afraid to knock on our door.
不客气
You're welcome.
说到结婚
Speaking of getting married...
我没说
I wasn't.
我在说
Well, I am.
我不认为你可以提起某件事 然后说
I don't think you're allowed to bring something up and then say,
"说到我刚提起的那件事"
"Hey, speaking of that thing I just brought up."
好吧 这样如何
Okay, how about this?
全新的话题
Entirely new subject:
我很好奇我们何时结婚
I've been wondering when we might get married.
你为什么好奇 出什么事了
Well, why are you wondering that? What's wrong?
没什么事 我们推迟了婚礼
N-Nothing's wrong. We postponed the wedding
因为酒吧生意不好 但我现在能买♥♥得起自动唱机了
because the bar was struggling, but now I can afford a jukebox.
或者砖头和沙子
u202dOr bricks and sand.
我的重点是
My point is...
没理由不定时间了
no reason not to set a date.
除非你有理由
Unless you have a reason.
你是在指责我不想结婚吗
Are you accusing me of not wanting to get married?
我之前没有 但我开始担心了
Well, I wasn't, but I'm starting to worry.
别担心 我迟早会嫁给你
Stop worrying. I will absolutely marry you at some point.
看吧 "迟早"
See, "At some point"
听起来像你不想结婚
sounds like that you don't want to get married.
所以你就是在指责我不想结婚
So you are accusing me of not wanting to get married.
你看起来对此不是很激动
Well, you don't seem very excited about it.
你想要激动啊
Oh, you want excited?
我们结婚吧
Let's get married!
更好了吗
Is that better?
好了一点 但感觉不真
I mean, a little bit. It didn't feel totally real.
老天啊 我愿意随时随地嫁给你
For crying out loud, I'd marry you any time, any place.
如果你今天不是忙着被骗
If we weren't busy getting scammed
买♥♥老式自动唱机 我今天就嫁给你
buying a vintage jukebox, I'd marry you today.
-你满嘴胡说 -我没有
- You're so full of it. - u202dI am not.
我们一直在经过速婚教堂
Well, we keep passing all these quickie wedding chapels.
在下一个教堂停车怎么样
How about I just pull over at the next one?
很好 就这个 停车
Great. That... Right up here. Pull in.
-我打灯了 -打你的打
- I'm putting on the blinker. - Blink away.
完美
Oh, perfect.
我一直想在阿贝兹快餐店旁边结婚
I've always wanted to get married next to an Arby's.
看吧 这就是你试图
See, there it is-- that-that's the flimsy excuse
用来逃避的蹩脚借口
you're gonna use to try to get out of it.
我没想逃避任何事 笨宝
I'm not getting out of anything, Bozo.
好 大嘴 现在结吗
Okay, big talker, are we doing this?
去他的 我们结婚吧
Screw it, let's get married!
极品老妈 第六季第二十二集[本季终]
你好吗 塔米
Hey, how's it going, Tam?
不好
Not good.
我起床时很开心 但我走进厨房♥后
I woke up in a pleasant mood, but then I walk into the kitchen
看到了玛乔丽的小便条
and there's one of Marjorie's little notes.
别忘记收牛奶 亲亲抱抱 玛乔丽
"Don't forget to put the milk away. X-O, Marjorie."
她不想亲亲 也不想抱抱
She doesn't mean the X, she doesn't mean the O.
而且这便条还能是谁写的
And who else is the note gonna be from?
猫又不会写字
The cats can't write.
而且它们永远不想收牛奶
And they would never want the milk put away.
如果你对我有意见 直说就行
I mean, if you have a problem with me, just talk to me.
别给我写便条 我又不可怕 对不对
Don't write me a note. I'm not scary, am I?
对 大姐大
No, ma'am.
快看 寿星在那里
Oh, look. There's the birthday girl.
我要去抱她 因为是她的生日
Got to go give her a hug 'cause it's her birthday.
戒瘾生日快乐
Happy sober birthday!
谢谢
Aw, thanks.
我连续六年醒来时都知道自己在哪
Six whole years of me waking up where I thought I would.
我清晰地记得你的第一次互助会
I remember your first meeting like it was yesterday.
你走进来...
You walked in...
求你别讲"吐在我包里"那个故事
Please don't tell the "Vomit in my purse" Story.
这是传统 人们喜欢听
It's a tradition. People love it.
总是能让我自我感觉更好
Always makes me feel better about myself.
留到派对时再讲
Ooh, save it for the party.
你今天会买♥♥蛋糕吧
So you're gonna take a cake today, right?
不 我会等
No, I'm gonna wait.
我妈妈和亚当在里诺
My mom's in Reno with Adam.
感觉这件大事必须有她在场才行
Feels too important to do it without her.
这是进步 你以前让你妈妈来
Well, that's progress. You used to only want your mom here
只是为了愤怒地对她分享
so you could angrily share at her.
诀窍是总在她之后分享 这样她无法反驳
The trick was to always share after her so she couldn't rebut.
她曾试图用嘀嗒糖贿赂我 让我别叫你
She'd try to bribe me with Tic Tacs not to call on you.
我有次为橙子屈服了
I did it once for orange.
-你好吗 塔米 -不太好 玛乔丽
- How's it going, Tammy? - Not good. Marjorie...
你今天醒来了吗
Did you wake up today?
-醒来了 但是 -你戒瘾了吗
- Yeah, but... - u202dAre you sober?
-戒了 但是 -你有住处 工作和朋友吗
- Yeah, but... - u202dDo you have a bed, a job and friends?
-有 -那就应该回答"非常好"
- Yeah. - Then the answer is "Amazing."
我猜是的 我非常好
I guess it is. I'm amazing.
为什么不在便条上写这种话
See, now why isn't that on a Post-it?
诺拉
Hey, Nora.
这是给你的
This is for you.
你生日为什么要给我贺卡
Why are you giving me a card on your birthday?
因为我想让你知道 如果没有你当我的互助对象
'Cause I just want you to know that I couldn't have made it
我去年是不可能挺过来的
through the last year without you as my sponsor,
而且我的戒瘾生活因为有你而更好
and my sobriety is better because you're a part of it.
现在你知道卡里写着什么了
And now you know what my card says.
恭喜
Well, congratulations.
现在你也知道我的卡里写着什么了
And now you know what my card says.
我们可以留着卡
You know, we could just keep these
明年继续送对方
and give them to each other next year.
怎么了
What?
过来跟我坐坐
Come sit with me for a minute.
不不不
No. No, no, no.
我不坐下
I am not sitting down.
坐下意味着坏消息
Sitting down means bad news.
你想的话可以站着
Well, you can stand if you want to,
但我依然要搬到明尼阿波里斯
I'm still moving to Minneapolis.
什么 你不是认真的吧
What? You're not serious.
我有个很棒的机会
I got an amazing opportunity.
我会成为第五频道新气象主播
I'm going to be the new Channel 5 meteorologist
负责万湖之地
for the Land of 10,000 Lakes
和一小部分加拿大
and a teeny, tiny part of Canada.
你不能去那里 我在这里
You can't go there, I'm here.
很抱歉在你生日这天告诉你
I'm sorry I'm telling you this on your birthday,
但他们现在需要我
but they need me right now.
薪水更高 市场更大