Oh, and do not give them to Christy.
她道德混乱
She lives in moral twilight.
天啊 那是艾米莉
Oh, my God, that's Emily.
我腋窝流汗了
My pits are drippin'.
别担心 你有漂亮的公♥寓♥
Relax. You have a lovely apartment
永久的圣诞树
with a permanent Christmas tree
以及航海祖先的画像
and a picture of a seafaring ancestor.
亲爱的
Hey, honey.
妈妈
Hi, Mom. Oh.
你说"大楼后面"时真不是在开玩笑啊
When you said "Back of the building," You weren't kidding.
吉尔
Hey, Jill.
你觉得怎样
So, what do you think?
我喜欢
I like it.
-真的吗 -真的吗
- You do? - You do?
来吧 我带你看看你的房♥间
Come on, I'll show you your room.
我给你买♥♥了歌♥手哈里·斯泰尔斯抱枕
I got you a Harry Styles pillow
让你练习亲吻技术
so you can practice your kissing.
除非你想要凯蒂·佩里抱枕
Unless you want a Katy Perry pillow.
不管你喜欢什么 我都接受
Whatever you're into, I'm cool with that.
我喜欢绿色
I like green.
邦妮 我们在哪
Bonnie, where are we?
你在说什么
What are you talking about?
看公♥寓♥前我是有心理准备的
I mean, I was braced for your apartment,
但这里看起来
but this looks like a place
就像他们审问土耳其人的地方
where they take Turkish people for questioning.
这只是个开始 吉尔
Hey, it's a beginning, Jill.
别管了
Back off.
抱歉
I'm sorry.
我只是担心艾米莉
I'm just worried about Emily.
她是个少女
She's a teenager.
她只关心有没有地方给她手♥机♥充电
All she cares about is a place to charge her phone.
参观结束
And that concludes the grand tour.
挺好的
Cool.
有地方给我手♥机♥充电吗
Is there a place I can charge my phone?
就在圣诞管旁边
Right here by the Christmas pole.
我来吧 早前我被电了一下
Let me do it. I got a little shock here earlier.
好 我猜我该走了
Okay, well, I guess it's time for me to be on my way.
感谢你做的一切 吉尔
Thanks for everything, Jill.
我会很想你的
I'm really gonna miss you.
我没事
I'm all right.
我也会想你的
I'm gonna miss you, too.
但我们依然会见面的
But we'll still see each other.
好了 吉尔 该走了
Okay, Jill. Time to go.
好吧
Okeydokey.
我走了
Here I go.
好的 感情 我懂你
Okay, feelings, I hear ya.
你的雪碧 我的爱尔兰雪碧
Sprite for you, Irish Sprite for me.
干杯
Cheers.
你对进酒吧没有任何问题吗
Mm. So you have no problem being in a bar?
没有 挺好玩的
No, it's fun.
实际上 我会玩个小游戏
Actually, I play this little game. Mm.
我在屋子里环顾一圈 试图猜出
I look around the room and try to figure out
以后会在路尽头的戒瘾会上看到谁
who I'm gonna be seeing in a meeting down the road.
真的吗 你觉得都有谁
Oh, really? Who do you like?
那个在他的女伴去厕所后
I got my eye on the guy who finished his date's drink
喝掉她的酒的男人
when she went to the bathroom.
也许是她有问题
Well, maybe she has the problem,
他是在救她
and he's trying to save her.
不 他刚吐手上了
Nope. He just threw up in his hand.
天啊
Oh, God.
拜托告诉我他们没在准备卡拉OK
Please don't tell me they're setting up for karaoke.
他们没有 不然我就要吐我手上了
No, then I'd be throwing up in my hand.
今天是冷知识夜
It's trivia night.
我对冷知识可在行了
Oh, I am awesome at trivia.
我是被电视抚养长大的
I was raised by a television.
我除了书没有别的朋友
And I had no friends except books!
我们赢定了
We are gonna crush this!
你的家庭影院 女士
Your home theater, ma'am.
已故法拉第太太的馈赠
Courtesy of the late Mrs. Farraday.
天啊 你真是我的救命恩人
Oh, my God, you're a lifesaver.
如果我真是救命恩人
Well... if I were a lifesaver,
我就会知道该怎么救噎食的法拉第太太
I would have known how to Heimlich Mrs. Farraday.
我想这也许会引诱艾米莉离开她的房♥间
I thought this might lure Emily out of her room.
我没事 天啊 谁应该修修这个
I'm okay. God, someone should fix that.
我为什么要说出来
Why would I say that out loud?
她晚饭后一直在里面
She's been in there since dinner.
我希望艾米莉和克丽丝蒂一样
Well... I hope Emily loves Falcon Crest
喜欢《鹰冠庄园》
as much as Christy did.
祝你好运
Good luck.
不 求你留下
Oh, no. Please stay.
这不是很顺利
This is not going well.
她几乎不怎么和我说话
She's barely talking to me.
给点时间吧
Well, give it time.
当我戒瘾 与克丽丝蒂团聚后
When I got sober and reconnected with Christy,
经常有冰冷而愤怒的漫长沉默
there were long stretches of cold, angry silence.
是什么打破了僵局
What finally broke the ice?
她打了我的后脑勺
She punched me in the back of the head.
嗯
Yeah.
我们现在会笑这事
We laugh about it now.
你能待到睡觉时间吗
Can you please just... just stay till bedtime?
就20分钟
20 minutes.
我是个很忙的女人
I'm a busy woman.
才不要在这里浪费一晚上
I am not wasting my night here.
《天龙特攻队》 我能待一小时
Ooh, The A-Team. You got me for an hour.
艾米莉 来看电视
Emily! Television!
11点将播报其他天气
We'll have the rest of your weather
以及热点新闻
and all the top news at 11:00.
下节预告 《天龙特攻队》
Next up, The A-Team.
格兰芬多学院院长是哪位霍格沃茨教授
Which Hogwarts professor was the head of Gryffindor House?
那人是米勒娃·麦格教授
Who is Professor Minerva McGonagall!
再说一次 我们没在玩《危险边缘》 但是答对了
Okay, again, we're not playing Jeopardy!, but yes,
德米/阿什顿队得分
point for Team Demi/Ashton!
吃瘪去吧 废柴们
In your face, suckahs!
好 说出新街边男孩的
Okay. Name all five members
五名成员
of New Kids on the Block.
唐尼 丹尼 乔丹 乔伊 乔恩
Donnie, Danny, Jordan, Joey, Jon.
又答对了
Right again!
我还爱你 唐尼
I still love you, Donnie!
一般情况下我现在该统计得分了
Normally, this is where I add up the scores,
但我们都能同意荣誉
but I think we can all agree that the glory
和一份免费的菊花洋葱属于德米/阿什顿队
and the free bloomin' onion go to Team Demi/Ashton!
我们赢得了一份洋葱 我们赢得了一份洋葱
We won an onion! We won an onion!
妹子 90年代尽在你掌握之中啊
Damn, girl, you own the '90s!
因为这里只有我不是90后
Oh! That's 'cause I'm the only one here who wasn't born in them.
你们可以去吧台领奖品
You can pick up your prize at the bar.
我去吧
Ooh-ooh. Let me.
我之前从未赢得过开胃菜
I've never won an appetizer before.
把碟子高高举起 就像是斯坦利杯一样
Well, raise it high like the Stanley Cup.
-那是什么 -去吧
- What's that? - Just go.
谢谢
Thank you.
我之前从未赢得过开胃菜
I never won an appetizer before.
-你们表现太棒了 -那是因为我看很多电视
- You guys killed it. - Ah. That's 'cause I watch a lot of TV
而他没朋友
and he didn't have any friends.
你俩真是有爱的一对
You're such a cute couple.
我们不是一对
Oh. We're not a couple.
他只是我的学校项目合作者
He's just a guy I'm doing a school project with.
我实际上40岁了
I'm actually 40.
不可能吧
No way.
真的
Way.
谢谢
Thank you.
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