极品老妈第五季第五集

Mom S05E05

Part3

2020年1月3日 21:57

Okay, I got her in the tub.
如果走运的话她会打瞌睡然后就一了百了了
With any luck, she'll doze off, and that'll be that.
你们希望对方死时真可爱
You guys are cute when you wish each other dead.
-给你做个三明治好吗 -谢谢
- Make you a sandwich? - Thanks.
你要娶我妈妈
So... you're marrying my mother.
除非她在浴缸里淹死了
Unless she drowns in that tub.
那我就该问你这事
Then you're the right person to ask.
我猜她身上有你喜欢的优点
I'm guessing there are things about her you like.
当然了
Of course.
有哪些啊
What are they?
你要我说得具体吗
Are you looking for something specific?
首先你觉得她是个好人吗
For starters, do you think she's a good person?
我跟你说我为什么做三明治
Let me tell you why I'm making a sandwich.
你妈妈和我今天本该去一家新开的
Your mother and I were supposed to go out to lunch today
意大利餐馆吃午餐
at that new Italian place.
你好
Hello there.
我们要两人桌
We need a table for two,
最好是靠窗的因为你懂的
preferably by a window because... you know.
轮椅跟靠窗有什么关系啊
What do wheelchairs have to do with the window?
嘘交给我
Shh. I got this.
抱歉现在没空桌了
I'm sorry. We don't have any tables available.
谢谢了我跟你说了我们该预定的
Thanks anyway. I told you we should've made a reservation.
稍等先生你不能拒绝我们
Hang on. Sir, you can't turn us away.
你知道我俩光是离开家
Do you realize how challenging it is
就有多费劲吗
for us to just get out of the house?
-邦妮 -但是今天
- Bonnie... - But today,
我们说该死我们出去
we said, "Darn it, let's go out
像正常人一样吃顿大餐吧
for a nice lunch like normal people."
你在逗我吧
Are you kidding me?
抱歉我来看看我能不能想想办法
I'm so sorry. Let me see if I can shift some things around.
别麻烦了我们走吧
Please don't bother. We're out of here.
什么为什么他在想办法了
What? Why? He's shifting. Uh...
你简直不可理喻
You're unbelievable.
抱歉他有一点躁郁症
I'm sorry. He's got a kiss of manic depression.
继续想办法我们马上回来
Keep shifting. We'll be right back.
天啊她简直是个禽兽
Oh, my God, she's a monster.
谢谢我感觉好受多了
Thank you. I feel so much better.
你什么意思
What are you talking about?
玛乔丽试图
Well, Marjorie was trying
说服我我妈变成好人了
to convince me that my mom's becoming a better person.
这真的好吃
This is really good.
生菜和肉的比例刚刚好
Excellent lettuce-to-meat ratio.
谢谢但我还没说完故事呢
Thank you, but I... I'm not done with the story.
-真的吗 -嗯
- Oh, really? - Mm-hmm.
接下来怎么了她突然打了婴儿吗
What happened next? She sucker-punch a baby?
听我说
Just listen.
慢点
Slow down!
把那个男人拦下他偷了我的钱包
Hey, stop that man! He stole my purse!
真的吗
Really?
你生什么气啊
What are you so mad about?
我们马上就有位置了
We're getting a table.
也许还能有免费甜点呢
We'll probably get a free dessert.
你怎么能那样让我出丑
How could you embarrass me like that?
有什么出丑的我的法子起作用了
What's embarrassing? It was working.
你让我成了一个让人怜悯的对象
You made me an object of pity.
为了吃到《纳帕谷月刊》上说的
Well, to get what Napa Valley Monthly calls
"那不勒斯外最棒的长条圆面"啊
"The best bucatini outside of Naples."
邦妮我不希望人们觉得我
Bonnie, I don't want people to see me
不同不足
as different, as "Less than."
-你才没有不足 -没错我是没有
- You're not "Less than." - You're damn right I'm not.
但你希望领班同情我们
But you wanted the maître d' to feel sorry for us.
我只是觉得我能弄到更好的位置
I just thought I could get a better table.
你知道我有多努力
Do you know how hard I work
就为了让人们别把我当轮椅男看待吗
for people not to see me as a guy in a chair?
我想我没考虑过这事
I guess I-I don't think about it
因为你看起来活得很容易
because you make it look so easy.
我就希望如此
Well, that's the way that I want it to look.
我不插队没有轮椅坡道时我不抱怨
I don't cut in line, I don't bitch when there's not a ramp,
我也不要求有特别待遇
and I don't ask for special treatment.
从不
Ever.
你是不我也不该的
No, you don't, and... and I shouldn't have, either.
我想我没有好好考虑你经历的事
I guess I don't think enough about what you go through
因为我忙着想我自己
because I'm too busy thinking about myself.
抱歉亚当非常抱歉
I'm sorry, Adam. I'm so, so sorry.
她真的说了"非常抱歉"啊
She actually said, "So, so sorry"?
我也大吃一惊
It surprised me, too.
她就直接道歉了吗
She just straight-up apologized?
没有责怪别人
No blaming other people,
没有假哭
no fake tears,
没说"我在寄养系统长大
no "I grew up in the foster system.
11岁之前都睡在狗窝里"
I slept in a dog bed till I was 11."
她甚至回去跟领班道歉了
She even went back inside and apologized to the maître d'.
哇
Wow.
她真的改变了
She really is changing.
该死克丽丝蒂
Damn it, Christy!
我的洗澡水变冷了
My bath is getting cold!
那就打开热水
So turn the hot water on!
不行我在看书呢
I can't! I'm reading!
稍等一会
Just give her a second.
不用来了我搞定了
Never mind! I figured it out!
我把书放下了
I put the book down!
别因为
Don't avoid the world
中重度斑块状银屑病就逃避世界
because of moderate to severe plaque psoriasis.
你知道斑块状银屑病是什么吗
Do you have any idea what plaque psoriasis is?
也许是因为银屑病而得奖
Maybe it's when you get an award for your psoriasis.
这人得了病然后吃了这种药
Well, this guy has it, and then he took this pill,
现在他过上了最幸福的生活
and now he's having the best day of his life.
他在游泳做陶器
He's swimming, he's making pottery.
真希望我也得病
Hey, I kind of wish I had it.
准备好吃午餐了吗
Ready for your lunch?
半小时前就准备好了
I was ready 30 minutes ago.
你要多久才能打开罐头啊
How long does it take you to open a can?
实际上这不是罐头食品
Actually, it's not from a can.
我是从头开始做的
I made it from scratch.
真的吗里面漂的是什么
Really? What's that floatin' in there?
蔬菜
Vegetables.
恶心
Ugh.
我强咽下去吧
Well, I'll choke it down.
祝你胃口好
Bon appétit.
你笑什么
What's with the smile?
我只是很高兴你是我妈妈
I'm just... happy you're my mom.
为什么
Why?
你真搞笑
You're so funny.
小心很烫
Careful. It's hot.
你这意料之外的愉快真是令我不安
This unexpected pleasantness is very unsettling.
女儿不能对妈妈好吗
Can't a daughter just be nice to her mother?
你这个女儿不能对我这妈妈好
Not this daughter, not this mother.
你最好习惯
Well, you better get used to it,
因为不管怎么样我都爱你
because I love you no matter what.
好吧
Yeah, well, uh,
我用了沃尔玛的迷路小孩房♥间办日托
I used the lost kid room at Walmart for day care.
没关系
That's okay.
保安教了我怎么拼我的名字
The security guard taught me how to spell my name.
那是怎么回事
What's that all about?
克丽丝蒂表现得像是爱我
Oh, Christy's acting like she loves me,
老娘真的气死了
and it's really pissing me off.
我也爱你
I love you, too.
老娘要用这靴子踢死你
I will kick you with this boot.
妈
Mom?
你今天不该去看医生吗
Weren't you supposed to go to the doctor today?
我去过了