Are you crazy?
你可不想要织毛衣的人
You don't want a knitter.
你打电♥话♥跟她聊你的问题 听到的
You call her with your problems, all you're gonna hear
全是咔哒咔哒
is "Clickety, click, click, click."
然后她会给你织一件蝴蝶毛衣
And then, she's gonna make you one of those butterfly sweaters,
你得穿着
and you'll have to wear it.
瞧瞧可怜的丹妮斯
Look at poor Denise.
-好啊 吉尔 -嗨
- Hi, Jill. - Hi.
克丽丝蒂
Christy.
玛乔丽
Marjorie.
好冷
Chilly.
而且并不是碗里装的好吃的那种
And not the delicious kind that comes in a bowl.
瞧 那就是我需要一个新互助对象的原因
See? That's why I need a new sponsor.
为了聊这种事情
To talk about things like that.
我知道我要找什么样的人
And I know exactly what I'm looking for.
亲切又温和的人 像是喝醉的鹅妈妈
Somebody who's sweet and gentle, like a drunk Mother Goose.
邦妮 我看见了你做的事
Bonnie, I saw what you did.
打翻了一杯咖啡 就要清理
You knock over a cup of coffee, you clean up a cup of coffee.
你不明白 我没洒...
You don't understand, I didn't spill that...
我不在乎 拖把在橱柜里
Don't care. Mop's in the closet.
好吧
Okay, fine.
去他的鹅妈妈
Screw Mother Goose.
我想要她
I want her.
谢谢你跟我喝咖啡
Thanks for having coffee with me.
我一直都喜欢你的分享
I've always liked your shares.
你肯定帮了许多人
I bet you help a lot of people.
也许太多了
Probably, too many.
你怎么有时间管我呢
So why would you have time for me?
抱歉我打扰你了 我该走了
I'm sorry I bothered you, I should go.
老娘可要费大劲儿了
Wow, you're gonna be a lot of work.
这意味着你会当我的互助对象吗
Does that mean you'll sponsor me?
我回答之前有个问题
Before I answer, I have one question.
我们每次见面时她们都要偷♥窥♥吗
Are they gonna do that every time we meet?
这才是鸡肉沙拉
Now that's what chicken salad is.
你能信他们给了我多少冰吗
Can you believe how much ice they gave me? u202d
我的毛衣是棕色的
My sweater's brown.
我会跟她们说的
I'll talk to them.
很好 我需要你一周至少
Okay, good. Now, I'm gonna need you to go to at least
参加五次互助会
five meetings a week.
好 那就五次
Wow. Okay, five it is.
你每天都得给我打电♥话♥
And you need to call me every day.
听起来不错
Sounds good.
我可以经常给你打电♥话♥吗
Can I call you constantly?
行啊 但八点之后不可以 那是我的家庭时光
Sure, but not after 8:00, because that's my family time.
我也是
Mine, too.
我那时候最需要你
That's when I'm gonna need you most.
你八点之后给我打电♥话♥ 还不是因为急事
You call me after 8:00 and it's not an emergency,
那你就要过来跟我孩子们看《小狗朋友》
you're coming over to watch Puppy Dog Pals with my kids.
知道了
Got it.
你有很多规矩
You've got a lot of rules.
我们才刚开始了
Oh, we're just getting started.
我是来帮助你的 不是当你的朋友的
I'm here to sponsor you, not be your friend.
你似乎有很多朋友
You seem to have plenty of those.
那这事定了吗
So I have a sponsor?
是的
Yes.
谢谢
Thank you.
你想分吃一个奶酪蛋糕来庆祝吗
Do you want to split a cheesecake to celebrate?
我不分吃 我觉得蛋糕里
I don't split things, I don't think cheese
不该有奶酪 我不喜欢庆祝
should be in cake and I don't like to celebrate.
我开玩笑的 但奶酪那事是认真的
I'm kidding, except about the cheesecake.
那质感很奇怪
That's a weird texture.
你参加匿名戒瘾会多久了
So, how long have you been in AA?
26年
26 years.
你在幼儿园开始戒瘾的吗
Did you get sober in kindergarten?
高中
High school.
我死于海♥洛♥因♥过量
I died of a heroin overdose.
就不到一分钟 但那引起了我的注意
For less than a minute, but it certainly got my attention.
我妈妈经历过两次
That happened to my mom twice.
她的解决办法是偷一个去纤颤器
Her fix was to steal a defibrillator.
学校 工作 还有什么
So, uh, school, work, what else?
你在谈恋爱吗
Are you in a relationship?
没有
No.
我今晚有个约会
I-I have a date tonight,
-但我想着要取消 -为什么
- but I'm thinking about cancelling it. u202d- Why?
因为我答应只是因为我发现
Because I only said yes after I found out
我前男友在约会
my previous boyfriend is dating.
你觉得我是在利用这个新人吗
Do you think I'm using the new guy?
不如你跟他约会 看看发展如何
How about you just go out with him and see what happens?
真的吗
Really?
我的人生观是 出现就好
My philosophy is, "Just show up."
我的是 担惊受怕
Mine is, "Worry about stuff
直到洗澡时掉发
till my hair comes out in the shower."
那你过得怎么样
How's that working out for you?
我扎着马尾辫可不是因为我喜欢这发型
I'm not wearing my hair in a ponytail 'cause I love it.
数到三
Hey. On the count of three,
我们大笑 让她们以为我们比她们
let's laugh real hard so they think we're having
聊得更开心
a better time than they are.
一二三
One, two, three.
你们让我看起来像是个傻瓜
Y'all made me look like an idiot.
你没去互助会 不在咖啡馆
You weren't at the meeting, you weren't at the bistro,
不接电♥话♥
you didn't answer your phone.
我只想确保你的猫
I just wanted to make sure your cats
没有享用你的尸体
weren't feasting on your carcass.
我也很高兴见到你
Good to see you, too.
我想着给你带点吃的
I thought about bringing you something to eat,
但我来看你就远超过
but I'm already way out of my comfort zone
我的舒适区了
just checking on you.
维克托和我已经吃了 谢谢
Victor and I already ate, but thanks.
你想喝点茶吗
You want some tea?
不用从碟子里舔就行
As long as I don't have to lick it out of a saucer.
互助会怎么样
So, how was the meeting?
就那样 你不在
Meh. You weren't there.
我想你了
I missed you.
我怎么了
What's happening to me?
克丽丝蒂怎么样
How's Christy doing?
挺好的 她在为约会做准备
Fine, she's getting ready for a date.
她的新互助对象鼓励的
Something her new sponsor encouraged.
她已经找到了新对象吗
So she found someone already?
你难过吗
Does that upset you?
你要对我吼"玛乔丽想要火腿"了吗
You gonna go all "Marjorie wants ham" on me?
我为她高兴
I'm happy for her.
只是有点惊讶这事发生得这么快
Just a little surprised it happened so quickly.
没那么复杂啦
Eh, it's not that complicated.
大部分互助会中 你扔一只死猫
Most meetings you can't swing a dead cat
就能砸中一个明智的老酒鬼
without hitting a wise old drunk.
无意冒犯 猫咪们
No offense, fellas.
如果有那么容易的话 那我到现在就会找到了
You know, if it were that easy, I'd have found someone by now.
你还没找到一个新的互助对象吗
You still haven't found a new sponsor?
邦妮 我跟她维持了36年
Uh, Bonnie, I had the same person for 36 years,
然后她喝酒了 别怪我
and then she drank, so shoot me
需要花几个月时间找到一个可以敞开心扉的人
if it's taken a couple of months to find someone to open up to.
那是一年前的事了
That happened over a year ago.
从那以后你再也没有互助对象了吗
You haven't had a sponsor since then?
我戒瘾很久了
I've been sober a long time.
这对我来说不一样
It's different for me.
有人曾说过 对于酒瘾者而言
Someone once said the most dangerous words
最危险的话就是"我不一样"
for an alcoholic were "I'm different."
等等 是你说的
Oh, wait, it was you.
别用我说的话来攻击我
Don't try to use my stuff against me.
但你经历了很多
But you have a lot going on.
你丈夫中风了