Good for you.
对我的确有好处 每晚两炮
It is good for me-- twice a night
清晨再来一发
and once in the morning.
这么说你年纪大了开始悠着点了
So you're slowing down in your old age?
克丽丝蒂 大学怎么样
So, Christy, how's college?
非常好
Couldn't be better.
我在上四门课 好喜欢
I'm taking four classes and just loving it.
说谎
Liar.
什么
What?
你刚把头发挽到耳朵后去了
You just did that hair-tuck thing behind your ear--
那就暴露了
that's your tell.
从你小时候开始
Ever since you were a little girl,
每次你把头发挽到耳朵后
whenever you tucked your hair behind your ear,
我就知道你在撒谎
I knew you were lying.
-真的吗 我会这样做吗 -是啊
- Really? I do that? - Yeah.
你总是如此
You always have.
所以我打扑克打不过你吗
Is that why I could never beat you at poker?
更主要是因为你才七岁吧 但这也是部分原因
Probably more that you were seven, but yeah.
实际上 我在学校有点挣扎
Actually, I am kind of struggling at school.
我也知道挽头发的事
I knew about the hair-tucking, too.
你才不知道 怎么了
No, you didn't. What's going on?
只是作业好多
It's just a ton of work.
而且我在餐厅当两轮班
Plus, I'm pulling in double shifts at the restaurant.
每天我上♥床♥睡觉时都很累 醒来时精疲力竭
Every day I go to bed tired and wake up exhausted.
我真的知道挽头发的事
I really did know about the hair-tucking thing.
我这样跟你说吧
How about I put this bee in your bonnet.
也许你可以别累死累活地成为律师
Maybe instead of killing yourself to become a lawyer,
而是来为我工作
you can come work with me.
做房♥地♥产♥吗
In real estate?
但从我小时候开始 我就想当律师
But I've wanted to be a lawyer since I was a little girl.
才不是 你小时候我陪着你呢
No, you haven't. I was there when you were a little girl,
你想当的是蓝妹妹
and you wanted to be Smurfette.
唯一女性蓝精灵 由格格巫创造
真棒 让她想起了别的没成真的梦想
Way to go-- remind her of other dreams that didn't come true.
六个月后你就能拿到房♥产证执照
Look, in six months you can get your real estate license
赚一大笔钱
and be pulling in a lot of money.
你学习考执照时
And while you're studying for your license--
这你可以在网上做 同时你可以来我的办公室工作
which you can do online-- you can come work in my office.
你在干什么
What are you doing?
我在给她提供一个机会
I'm offering her an opportunity.
没人要你挽救一个没事的人
Nobody asked you to fix what isn't broken.
实际上 我有事
Actually, I'm pretty broken.
你只是想让她喜欢你
You're just trying to make her into you.
那样不对吗 我是说 拜托
And would that be so wrong? I mean, come on,
我有一栋海滨别♥墅♥和一辆特斯拉
I have a beach house and a Tesla.
真不错 我也有一栋海滨别♥墅♥
Oh, nice. I have a beach house, too.
你没跟我们说过你有一栋海滨别♥墅♥
You never told us you had a beach house.
我是没有
Uh, no. No, I did not.
邦妮 我不明白你为什么觉得受到了威胁
Bonnie, I do not understand why you're so threatened by this.
是吗 我也不明白
Yeah? Well, I don't, either.
告诉你一下
Just for the record,
我真的知道挽头发的事 我只是从没跟你说过
I really did know about the hair-tucking-- I just never told you,
因为我得知道你什么时候在撒谎
'cause I needed to know when you were lying.
妈妈
Hey, Mom...
我爱你
I love you.
我也爱你
Aw. I love you, too.
我比珍宁更了解你
And I know you a lot better than Jeanine.
我知道继续上学
I know that staying in school
比她愚蠢的房♥地♥产♥主意好得多
is better than her stupid real estate nonsense.
我每天早上洗澡时都会哭
I cry every morning in the shower.
谁不会啊
Oh, who doesn't?
亲爱的 戒酒好玩吗
Hey, baby. Did you have fun not drinking?
你怎么起这么早
What are you doing up so early?
我不想吐在床上
I didn't want to throw up in bed.
你真是贴心啊
Well, aren't you considerate.
看来你昨晚没走运[上♥床♥]啊
I take it you didn't get lucky last night.
你得问你妈妈
You'd have to ask your mother.
我都不知道我问你干什么
I'm not even sure why I asked you.
好啊 种马
Hey, stud.
看来是上了
That'd be a yes.
我听见的污染卫生间的声音是你弄的吗
Was that you I heard painting the toilet?
对他好点 他本可能吐在你背上的
Be nice to him. It could've been on your back.
给你
Here you go.
邦妮·普兰科特举世闻名的解酒办法
Bonnie Plunkett's world-famous hangover cure.
你让我完整了
You complete me.
谁这么早就来了
Who's that so early?
珍宁 她要带我参观她的房♥地♥产♥办公室
Jeanine. She's gonna show me her real estate office.
-珍宁是谁 -没谁 你流口水了
- Who's Jeanine? - Nobody. You got drool.
早上好
Morning.
请进吧 我去拿东西
Hey, come on in. Let me get my things.
好啊 你好 邦妮
All right. Hey, Bonnie.
嘿
Hey.
你好啊
Hello.
-你好 -珍宁 这是亚当
- Hi. u202d- Jeanine, Adam.
亚当 这是珍宁
Adam, Jeanine.
很高兴认识你
Nice to meet you.
昨晚你享受了馅饼[小妹妹]吗
Did you enjoy your pie last night?
那是个私人问题
Uh, that's kind of a personal question.
我给你带了一块馅饼
I brought you a slice of pie.
那就享受了
Oh. Then yes.
你们怎么认识的
So, how do you guys all know each other?
我小时候我们跟珍宁住一起
We lived with Jeanine when I was little.
真的吗 你不是说没谁吗
Really? I thought you said she was nobody.
喝你的酒去 你们走吧
Drink your beer. Off you go.
-回头见 -再见
- See you later. - u202dBye.
拜托告诉我你妈没弄断他的腿
Please tell me your mother didn't break his legs
防止他跑走
so he wouldn't run away from her.
这就是大工作室
And this is the bullpen.
这些人都为你工作吗
Wow. All these people work for you?
是啊 我喜欢觉得我们是一家人 但是
Yeah. I like to think of it as a family, but
如果他们不巴结我 就得滚蛋
if they don't kiss my ass, they're out.
-好球 老板 -谢谢
- Nice shot, boss. - Thank you.
你觉得呢
So what do you think?
想当房♥地♥产♥经纪人吗
You want to be a real estate agent?
我不知道 很有诱惑力
I don't know. It's pretty tempting.
但是
But?
我只是害怕我会一直想着
I'm just afraid I'd always wonder
如果我成了律师会怎么样
what would have happened if I had become a lawyer.
我就是律师
Hmm. u202dI'm a lawyer.
对 艾丽萨 这是克丽丝蒂
Oh, right. Alissa, Christy.
你好
Hi.
你好 你是律师吗
Hi. You're an attorney?
为什么在卖♥♥♥房♥♥子
Why are you selling real estate?
因为我想住在室内
'Cause I want to live indoors.
但你有法律学位啊
But you have a law degree.
怎么没赚大钱呢
How come you're not out there making the big bucks?
她真可爱
Oh, she's adorable.
-是啊 -怎么 我错过了什么
- I know. - What? What'd I miss?
亲爱的 现在就业市场很严峻
Listen, honey, it's a tough job market out there.
我这有律师 工商管理硕士 建筑师
I've got a lawyer, I've got an MBA, an architect
还有打不中曲线球的多米尼加游击手
and a Dominican shortstop who couldn't hit a curve ball.
当我意识到我当服务员赚得还更多时
I quit law when I realized
我就不干律师了
I made more money waiting tables.
珍宁 她吓到我了
Jeanine, she's scaring me.
没什么
That's nothing.
丽丝 告诉克丽丝蒂
Liss, tell Christy about that time
你是奥克兰的公社辩护律师的那会儿
that you were a public defender in Oakland,
那个毒鬼当事人用铅笔捅了你
and that junkie client stabbed you with a pencil.
真的很疼
It really hurt.
天啊
Oh, God.
谢谢 丽丝 过来 听好了
Thanks, Liss. Come here. Listen.