I'm sorry, what?
He was incredible back when he had legs.
Oh, I'm... Oh, I'm sorry.
I don't want... I didn't mean that.
I mean, of course he still has legs, but, you know...
You slept with Adam?
Dear Lord, will this night ever end?
- Answer me. - u202dCalm down.
It was a long time ago before I met Mitch,
and we only did it, like, t... t... 20 times.
Really thought you were gonna say two.
So, you were a couple?
No, oh, no!
No, no, it was just that kind of raw kind of sex.
You know, the kind you think about
when you're on the toilet having a cigarette.
各位 这很重要 各位 这很重要
Hey, guys, this is important. Guys, this is important, listen.
Mitch doesn't know, so we just have to keep it between us.
You know... sisterhood of the traveling penis.
I don't know what you're always whining about.
This thing is awesome.
Hey, baby, did you know
that the liquor store down on the corner,
that it delivers?
Just eat your burger, Dickweed.
Ugh, I don't want to huddle.
Just let me go to sleep.
怎么 你觉得现在自己太美 不能谈了吗
What? You think you're too pretty to huddle now?
Get in there.
I am pretty, aren't I?
Why didn't you get me any vodka?
Why didn't you get me a 24-year-old Asian girl with big boobs?
Hey, words hurt.
Ah, I love you.
And you have perfect boobs.
That right there.
That's how you make a marriage work.
Where are we?
I'm sorry, I just can't wrap my head around it.
She's probably exaggerating.
When it comes to sex,
女人会说少 克丽丝蒂 不是说多
women round down, Christy, not up.
- We do? - You don't?
I didn't, but I will now.
I'm not sure how to handle it.
There's nothing to handle. It's in the past.
No, it's in my living room,
and more important, he didn't tell me.
So, what, you're gonna confront him?
I thought the whole idea of this evening
was to make his friends like you.
That's when I was putting deviled eggs on levels.
I should've just put out a dog bowl.
Okay, Adam, it's time you and I have a talk.
Under the head, under the head.
Where's Lord and Lady Nutsack?
Probably playing kickball with their livers.
来 亲爱的 我们拍部三♥级♥片♥
Come on, baby, let's make a dirty movie.
好 转过身 放松
Okay, okay, turn around and try to relax.
Thin walls. I get it now.
We're gonna have to burn that bed.
What just happened?
I don't know. That sounded bad.
I guess we should go see if they're okay.
Or we just leave and rebuild our lives elsewhere.
Well, this is just sad.
Remember being too drunk to have sex? u202d
It's the main reason you're an only child.
So, what do we do?
Roll them on their sides and be grateful
we don't live like this anymore.
So very grateful.
Oh, God, was that him or her?
Does it really matter?
- What? - u202dWhat the hell?!
Ah, I was... I was looking for the bathroom.
Well, I'm not it!
Well, okay, no harm, no foul.
Dónde está el baño?
What is going on?
Mitch, where'd you go?
Into my bed!
You miserable bastard.
Come on, it was an honest mistake.
When you grabbed my ass in the kitchen,
was that an honest mistake?
Well, a person can make more than one honest mistake.
You grabbed her ass?
With both hands.
Damn it, Mitch.
Why is everybody yelling?
Your best friend just tried to get in bed with my daughter.
什么 不 那不对
What? No, no, that can't be right.
It may have been 18 months and 11 days,
but I know when a man is in bed with me.
This is all your fault.
You invited these zoo animals into my home,
and you never told me
you slept with this monkey.
Approximately 20 times.
You-You didn't think that was something you should tell me?
You porked my wife?!
I wouldn't use that word.
But that was before we got together.
We're married now, and you're playing hump the hostesses-es?
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Wait a minute, you...
you hit on Bonnie?
It was nothing. Yeah, it was just joking around.
It was, it was, you know, my bad hand bit.
She didn't get it.
You did bad hand on my woman?
And good hand.