好的好的 明天开会前我们谈
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's talk about it before the meeting tomorrow.
挂了
I got to go.
是谁
Who was that?
玛乔丽
Marjorie.
你打给她的吗
You called her?
她打给我的
She called me.
她为什么打给你
Why would she call you?
她和维克托有些问题
She's having some problems with Victor.
老天 怎么了
Oh, God. What?
原来 他的一些性需求
As it turns out, he has some sexual needs
让她重新评估了一些
that are causing her to reevaluate some...
根深蒂固的信仰
long-held beliefs.
好了 信息量太大了
Okay. Heard enough.
是 我建议做些呼吸运动
Yeah. I suggested some breathing exercises
可能会让她放松
that might relax her.
求你别说了
Please stop.
我还告诉她 她需要叫停安全词
Oh, I also told her she needed a safe word.
晚安 妈
Good night, Mom.
等等
Wait a minute.
玛乔丽才没问你性♥爱♥的问题
Marjorie doesn't call you about sex.
你们是要给我办惊喜派对 对吗
You guys are throwing me a surprise party, aren't you?
什么 没有
What? No.
得了 周六就是我的生日
Come on, my birthday's on Saturday.
过去几天
You and the girls have been
你和姐♥妹♥们♥一直在我旁边窃窃私语
whispering around me the past few days.
别搞错了 我们说的是你的刘海
Well, if you must know, we've been whispering about your haircut.
我们打算等头发长回来再带你玩儿
We were gonna loop you in once it grew out.
我的刘海有什么不好
What's wrong with my haircut?
你看起来像一个在戏中扮演小男孩的女人
You look like a woman playing a small boy in a play.
别想骗我
Nice try.
你们要给我办派对
You're throwing me a party.
你得知道 我周六工作
Just so you know, I'm working Saturday night,
要办就得在周五
so it would have to be Friday.
我喜欢卡拉OK和玉米卷吧
And I love karaoke and taco bars.
别让玛乔丽做她的德式巧克力蛋糕
Oh, and don't let Marjorie make her German chocolate cake.
柏林墙太容易倒了
The Berlin Wall went down easier.
吉尔怀孕了
Jill's pregnant.
什么
What?
两个月了 我们窃窃私语说的是这个
Two months-- that's what we've been whispering about.
等等
Wait.
只有我不知道吗
Everyone knows except me?
她让我们别告诉你
She told us not to tell you.
你为什么现在告诉我
Why are you telling me now?
因为我想睡觉
Because I want to go to sleep.
真不敢相信她排挤我
I can't believe she's freezing me out.
你跟她说她不可能做个好母亲时
Well, she probably took it personally when you told her
她可能怀恨在心了
she wouldn't be a good mother.
她不会是好母亲 你知道的
She wouldn't and you know it.
但我没有当她面说
Yeah, but I didn't say it to her face
当时人家在医院 还有五分钟就要取卵子了
in a fertility clinic five minutes before she had her eggs extracted.
难道我要等到医生给阴♥道♥扩张器上油吗
Was I supposed to wait till the doctor greased up the speculum?
你知道我讨厌这个词
You know I hate that word.
她怎么想的 难道她肚子大了
And what did she think, that I wasn't gonna notice
我会看不出来吗
when she started showing?
不 但她现在非常开心
No. But she's really happy right now,
她不希望被你毁了这种幸福
and she didn't want you to ruin her joy.
等她整夜不能睡照顾大哭的宝宝时
Wait till she's up all night with a screaming baby,
才知道什么叫毁幸福
that's what'll ruin her joy.
对 就因为这种态度
Yeah. And that right there is why you
你不会被邀请参加宝宝送礼会
won't be getting an invite to the baby shower,
会在这里举♥行♥ 你懂点事别出现
which will be here, so make yourself scarce.
知道吗
You know what?
我不在乎
I don't care.
让她生孩子去
Let her have a baby.
希望一切都好
Hope it all works out great.
不关我的事
None of my business.
晚安
Night.
晚安
Night.
我刚想到你生日送你什么 帽子
Oh. I just realized what I can get you for your birthday-- a hat.
极品老妈 第四季第十集
我很高兴你告诉了克丽丝蒂
I for one am glad you told Christy.
对人说谎我心里不舒服
I'm not comfortable lying to people.
那是因为你说谎不够多
That's 'cause you don't do it enough.
说谎是肌肉 不锻炼不行
It's a muscle, you got to work it.
她以为我们窃窃私语
She actually thought all the whispering
是在计划给她办生日惊喜派对
was us planning her surprise birthday party.
没错 这周末是她生日
Oh, that's right, it's her birthday this weekend.
不如我们真的给她办场惊喜派对
Hey, how about we really do throw her a surprise party?
好主意
Oh, that's a great idea.
我可以做德式巧克力蛋糕
I can make my German chocolate cake.
这是克丽丝蒂的最爱
Oh! It is Christy's favorite.
很好
Good.
慢着 我不知道你是否说的是真话
Wait, I don't know if you're telling the truth or not.
这令我成为
And that's what makes me
这桌上最有趣的人
the most interesting person at this table.
你不用再"嘘"了
You don't have to "Shh" anymore.
我知道吉尔怀孕了 你们讨厌我的刘海
I know Jill's pregnant. And you hate my hair.
我们不讨厌 我们只是担心你又开始喝酒了
We don't hate it, we're just afraid you were drinking again.
克丽丝蒂 不如你主动找吉尔和好
Christy, why don't you reach out to Jill and make up?
我试过了 你看到了
I tried. You saw.
跟某人说她头顶公主光环
I mean, how many times do you have to apologize
她完全不懂养孩子
for telling somebody that they're an entitled princess
为这话我得道歉多少次啊
who has no clue how to raise a child?
我觉得是23次
I'm gonna go with 23.
就像你的朋友和男友分手
It's like when your friend breaks up with a guy,
你告诉她其实你一直讨厌她男友
and you tell her that you always hated him and then
结果他们结婚了 你怎么办
they end up getting married. What do you do?
你参加婚礼 洒下祝福之米 生活继续
You show up, you throw rice, you move on.
事实上 不应该再洒米了
Actually, you're not supposed to throw rice anymore.
鸟吃了会噎死的
The birds choke on it.
很好 温蒂 你完全抓住了她的重点
Good, Wendy. You got the point she was making.
克丽丝蒂 宝宝火车已经离站了
Christy, the baby train is leaving the station.
你得上车
You need to hop on board.
你有帽子 适合出门
Hey, you got the hat for it.
但凭什么我要去道歉
But why do I have to be the one to apologize?
她说我是一个糟糕的母亲
She said I was a lousy mother.
我见过你的孩子 她没说错
I've met your kids. She's not wrong.
你打算怎么做 永远生吉尔的气吗
What are you gonna do, stay angry at Jill forever?
这将强迫我们选边站队
Which forces us all to choose sides.
选边站队 你是我妈
Choose sides? You're my mother.
对 但她超有钱 我是可以被收买♥♥的
Yeah, but she's got a lot of money and I can be bought.
大家好 我是吉尔 我是酒瘾者
Hi, I'm Jill. I'm an alcoholic.
你好 吉尔
Hi, Jill.
想一想 过去几周
Well, let's see, things have been going
事情相当顺利
pretty good the last few weeks.
我家主卧浴室的改造工程终于完成了
Um, finally finished the remodel of my master bathroom,
我的大理石噩梦结束了
so my marble nightmare is over.
我们都知道那种感觉有多棒
We all know how good that feels.
想想看 还有什么
Let's see, what else?
我无法保守秘密
Oh, I can't keep a secret.
我怀孕了
I'm pregnant.
我快有宝宝了
I'm gonna have a baby!
现在说有些早
It's a little early to talk about it,
但我太激动了 而且我不希望
but I'm just so thrilled and I didn't want
大家以为我长胖了
y'all thinking I'm turning into a fatty.
别
No.
我疯狂地爱着肚里的孩子
It's crazy how much I love this little biscuit cooking inside me,
我等不及
and I just can't wait for her
她出生 开始爱我
to get here and start loving me back.
我会把她打扮得很漂亮 带她散步
I'm gonna dress her up, and take her on long walks,
在公园玩