or how to take a little boy...
But what if I get a child that doesn't listen or misbehaves?
You know, a lot of these foster kids have some serious issues.
What if I can't discipline them?
It's not like with my housekeeper,
where I can just threaten her with deportation, right?
You know, you really shouldn't text during the meeting.
You really shouldn't have Ben Franklin's haircut,
but here we are.
That's who it is.
He's not officially divorced.
Can you believe that?
He never said a word.
Since when do you care if a guy's divorced?
Since I fell in love with this paraplegic dickweed.
- Okay, you're done. - What are you doing?
- You'll get it back after the meeting. - Give it to me.
-给我 -玛乔丽 给你
- Give it. - Marjorie, here.
You girls sit still and be quiet!
Huh, look at that.
I can be a mom.
You are the least subtle person alive.
Oh, I'm sorry, did I wake you?
Just spill it.
I was downstairs with Adam and--
You're going to the bathroom
while I'm pouring my heart out to you?
I don't pee through my ears.
- Well, I don't think I can trust him anymore. u202d- Why?
I just found out he's seeing his ex-wife tomorrow.
Well, at least he told you.
成熟点 他没告诉我 是我偷看了他的手♥机♥
Oh, grow up. He didn't tell me. I broke into his phone.
How'd you do that? The FBI can't do that.
很容易 你就跟他做♥爱♥ 做到他睡着
It's easy. You just have sex with him till he falls asleep.
Then you press his thumb onto the home button of his phone.
What if he wakes up?
You stick his thumb in your mouth and start over.
You don't wash your hands?
I didn't touch anything.
Anyway, he's seeing her tomorrow.
Why don't you ask him about it?
'Cause then he'll know I broke into his phone
and won't trust me anymore.
Yeah, but he doesn't know that.
Maybe this relationship with Adam isn't good for you.
You guys only do two things together,
and both of them disturb the neighbors.
Well, Solitary Sue,
some people call that being in a relationship.
Okay, Bipolar Betty.
But you're not "Some people."
You can't keep swinging from high to low
without something bad happening.
I'm worried you're gonna drink.
I want you to know I hear you.
So what are you gonna do?
Well, I guess if I'm really committed to this relationship,
I'm gonna have to hack into his e-mail.
Yeah. Sounds like you got this.
谢谢 亲爱的 你总是让我脚踏实地
Thanks, baby. You always bring me back down to Earth.
- Good night. - Good night.
Oh, God, that's why I woke up with my thumb in her mouth.
给 双面煎鸡蛋 你喜欢的
Here you go. Over easy, just the way you like 'em.
Thanks. You were really something last night.
Aw, I just do those things to show how much I love you.
Really? Feels like you do them just to put me to sleep.
I could have two reasons.
What you got going today?
Actually, I'm gonna see my ex-wife for lunch.
Um, um, she's coming over with my dog,
and we got some stuff to talk about.
Well, why didn't you tell me last night?
'Cause you were doing those things, and I'm not stupid.
Okay, just so we're clear.
Your ex-wife, who you're not really divorced from,
is coming over to chat, and there's a dog.
Okay, first of all, we're not divorced
because she hasn't gotten around to signing the papers,
and I told you about my dog.
-是啊 山姆之子 -是参孙
- Yeah, yeah, Son of Sam. - Samson.
And that's another thing.
If it's your dog, how come he lives with her?
Because he's really old, and it's hard for me
to take care of him in this thing.
That checks out.
But why the chitchat?
We have some investment property that we co-own.
Might be time to sell.
Wow, you just have answers for everything.
Oh, just relax, Bonnie.
After last night, I couldn't cheat on you
一♥丝♥不♥挂♥ 吊着绳子落到我身上 我也不会出轨
if Angelina Jolie was buck naked and lowered onto me by ropes.
Uh-huh. So with a little rest and a pulley system,
you'd take a whack at Angelina Jolie?
Yes! And so would you!
Once again, you have answers for everything!
Oh, my God, why do I love her?!
We don't know!
So, as we speak, my boyfriend and his semi ex-wife
are having a romantic lunch in his apartment.
With his very old dog.
Aw, Adam has a dog? What kind?
I think it's a "Shut the hell up, Wendy" Doodle.
The point is, this broad's plotting to get him back.
Ex-wives'll do that.
They'll get their boobs redone, cook up a couple of steaks,
invite the guy over for a little night swimmin'.
Or stuff of that nature.
Bonnie, if there's any hope for you and Adam,
you got to learn to trust him.
Oh, I trust him. It's her I'm worried about.
See right there, that's your problem.
Trying to control people, places and things you can't do anything about.
What you need to do is write down a list of all your fears,
and then just turn them over to your higher power, who's...
Marjorie, she's gone again.
But again, dynamite stuff.
Can I help you?
Are you Danielle Janikowski?
I am. And you are?