Sorry. I texted you, like, 1,000 times but you didn't answer.
这人是谁
Who is this person?
你好 我是乔迪
Hi, I'm Jodi.
你是维奥莉特的朋友吗
Ah. You're Violet's friend?
不 克丽丝蒂是我的互助对象
No, Christy's my sponsor.
我搞不懂了
I'm lost.
我在帮她戒瘾
I'm helping her stay sober.
你为什么要住在这里
Why do you need to crash here?
因为我姐是个贱♥人♥
'Cause my sister's a bitch.
出什么事了
What happened?
妈 你能回头再聊吗
Mom, can you do this another time?
等等 小维 发生什么事了
Hang on, Vi. What happened?
我想我没问她就借了她的车
I-I guess I borrowed her car without telling her first,
她对我发火了
and she totally freaked out on me.
这是一道送分题 你错了
Oh, this is an easy one-- you're wrong.
去跟你姐姐赔礼道歉 还有去互助会
Go make amends to your sister and get your ass to a meeting.
但她对我很刻薄
But she was really mean to me.
快去
Go!
随你们信不信 我为那姑娘感到很骄傲
Believe it or not, I am so proud of that girl.
克丽丝蒂 我得问问
So, Christy, I have to ask,
是什么激励了你 让你回去上学 当律师
what inspired you to go back to school to become a lawyer?
实际上 从我小时候开始
Well, actually, it was something I've wanted to do
我就一直想当律师
since I was a kid.
我看见她几次被警♥察♥拖走
I saw this one get hauled off by the police a bunch of times,
然后
and...
我想帮她
I wanted to help her.
你不能说你读到了讲林肯的书吗
You couldn't just say you read a book about Lincoln?
真有意思
You know, that's interesting.
我读心理学也是为了帮我妈妈
I got into psychology to help my mother.
如你所见 并没有用
As you can see, it didn't work.
真可爱
Cute.
我还以为是为了弄明白
I thought it was to understand
你对乳♥房♥♥的执念
your obsession with boobies.
我给他喂奶喂到了四岁
I had to breastfeed him till he was four.
妈
Ma...
你想挑衅大人物 这就是下场
Yeah, you want to zetz with the big boys, that's what happens.
我们要聊聊他俩的年龄差距吗
So, we gonna talk about the age difference with these two or what?
拜托 继续说胸部吧
Please let's go back to boobies.
克丽丝蒂 告诉我
Christy, tell me
你不担心
that you're not concerned.
我一开始担心
Well, I-I was at first,
但他们在一起好像很快乐
but they both seem happy together, and...
这才是重要的吧
isn't that what's important?
谢谢 玛丽·波平斯
Hmm. Thank you, Mary Poppins.
你呢
How 'bout you?
小菲
Well, Phyl...
我有什么资格评判呢
...who am I to judge?
我是中年女人了
I'm a middle-aged woman.
那跟这事有什么关系
What does that got to do with anything?
我只是想告诉你 我比你年轻得多
I just wanted you to know I'm a lot younger than you are.
我去吧
Why don't I get that.
那才是重击
Now, that's a zetz.
你来干什么
What are you doing here?
你不接电♥话♥ 不回短♥信♥
You wouldn't answer your phone, you don't return my texts.
我想知道怎么了
I want to know what's going on.
情况是我们这里有客人
What's going on is we've got company.
我明天跟你说
I'll talk to you tomorrow.
-不行 -不行吗
- No! - No?!
必须听我说话
I demand to be heard!
我不是你的秘密情趣玩具
I am not your secret sex toy!
做点什么
Do something.
妈 你介意出去处理愚蠢的生活吗
Mom, you mind taking your dumb-ass life outside?
好吧 出去
Sure. Move.
你能想象她们酗酒时的样子吗
Can you imagine what they were like when they drank?
妈 拜托
Mom, please...
我受够了一切都是你做主
I'm tired of letting you call all the shots.
我们到底在不在谈恋爱
Now, are we in a real relationship or not?
我之前从未见过你这么强迫的一面
Wow. I've never seen this forceful side of you before.
有时候男人会...
Well, sometimes a man's got--
-我不喜欢 -好吧
- Well, I don't like it! - Okay.
克丽丝蒂在吗 我得跟她谈谈
Is Christy here? I need to talk to Christy.
她在里面 怎么了
Yeah. She's inside. What's going on?
我的前夫和讨厌的麻醉师
My ex-husband is having a baby
要生孩子了
with his skanky anesthesiologist,
这太疯狂了 因为他从来不想跟我生孩子
which is crazy, because he never wanted to have a baby with me.
我是说
I mean,
为什么有人会不想跟我生小孩啊
why wouldn't anybody want to have a baby with me?!
你甚至都没法吃镇定药吗
So you can't even take a Xanax?
不行
No.
我们高贵优雅地面对困难
We face our difficulties with dignity and grace.
克丽丝蒂 我需要你
Christy, I need you.
我丈夫把他婊♥子♥的肚子搞大了
My husband knocked up his whore.
各位 这是吉尔
Everybody, this is Jill.
吉尔 这是
Jill, this is...
不在乎
Don't care.
你为什么不接电♥话♥
Why don't you answer your phone?
-我们去厨房♥说 -妈
- Let's talk in the kitchen. - Mom,
就不能晚点再说吗
can't you do this later?
五分钟就好
Just need five minutes.
我本来会是个超棒的母亲的
I would've been a wonderful mother!
也许六分钟
Maybe six minutes.
也许我们该走了
Maybe we should go.
你开玩笑吗 吃着晚餐还能看表演呢
Are you kidding? This is like dinner and a show.
你会后悔的 邦妮·普兰科特
You'll regret this, Bonnie Plunkett!
你会怀念我的爱的
You're gonna miss my lovin'!
第二幕
Act two.
很抱歉
Sorry about that.
一切还好吧
Is everything okay?
不算还好 我得跟他分手
Not really. I had to end it with him.
因为他不想做你的秘密情趣玩具
All because he didn't want to be your secret sex toy.
看在老天的份上
Oh, for God's sakes.
他们大声说出来了
They say these things out loud.
我不该听吗
I shouldn't listen?
不是他的问题
It wasn't him.
我只是很难作出承诺
It's just hard for me to make a commitment.
为什么
Yeah? Why is that?
我不知道维奥莉特跟你说过没有
Well, I don't know if Violet told you,
但我此生挚爱去年去世了
but the love of my life died last year.
真抱歉 不
Oh, I'm sorry. No.
他怎么死的
How did he die?
我们当时在床上
We were in bed together...
妈 快出来
Mom! Now!
抱歉 再两分钟
I'm sorry. Two more minutes.
算了 我们走吧
Oh, forget it. Let's just get out of here.
维奥莉特 拜托 我在努力
Violet, please, I'm trying.
你总是在努力
Yeah, you're always trying.
我只要你吃一顿正常的家庭晚餐
I asked you for one normal family dinner
你都做不到
and you couldn't do it.
朋友们来找我帮忙
Hey, friends come to me for help.
我不会拒绝她们的
I am not gonna turn them away.
-但是我 -没有但是
- Yeah, but I'm-- - There's no buts.
我需要她们时 她们都在
People were there for me when I needed them.
现在轮到我了
Now it's my turn.
真棒 一如既往
Great. And as always,
我需要什么不重要
it doesn't matter what I need.
走吧
Let's go.
等等 我能说句话吗
Wait, may I say something?
在车里说
Say it in the car.
我今晚过来时
When I came here tonight,
不知道会遇见什么
I didn't know what to expect.
我是说 酒鬼 毒瘾者