that same stink eye her mother always gave me.
Anybody got a cookie?
Anybody got a cookie?
Yeah, well, at least Bonnie gets it.
Bonnie totally gets it, Fred.
Why don't we change the subject?
All right, anything you want, sweetheart.
Do you want a cookie, 'cause there's a whole tray over...
You know what I like best about country club life?
Signing for things.
Those people are so rich they don't use money anymore.
I'm glad you had a good time.
I'm starting to feel like I belong there.
Like after a horrible mix-up at the hospital,
I was finally returned to my real people.
Is that a crab leg?
Yeah, don't worry, I signed for it.
I know what you liked best.
When Freddy gave his daughter a colonoscopy right at the table.
He was rough on her, wasn't he?
That was a dry scope minus the Demerol drip.
I actually felt kind of bad for her.
The woman has never missed an opportunity
to make you feel like garbage.
I know, I just...
I don't like to see a father talk to his daughter like that.
Really? I loved it!
He took the stick out of her ass
and smacked her right over the head with it.
Did you ever consider that maybe she's the way she is
because of how he treats her?
What's happening here?
You're screwing with me, right?
I'm just not sure I can be with someone
who has so little regard for his own children.
What's wrong with you?
This guy is crazy about you
and doesn't like his own daughter.
So, you give him a kid he's even vaguely fond of,
the days of paying off our credit cards with credit cards is over.
Mom, my uterus is not your 401k.
It could be if Fred makes a deposit.
Should we take this into the bedroom?
But we-we need to talk about something first.
Oh, you don't have to be married twice
to know that's never good news.
It's not bad, it's just, it's about your daughter.
What about her?
you hurt her feelings the other day.
At the country club.
You were really mean to her.
Oh, that's just how we are.
不 弗雷德 她有事
No, Fred, she's not.
What? I don't understand.
I thought you didn't like her.
but you should.
Well, of course, I like her.
I love her.
I mean, my God, I've given her everything she's ever asked for:
horses, ski trips,
tennis lessons, a semester abroad,
which should really just be called
How to Get Laid in Italy.
And after all that,
all she does is walk through life
turning up her nose at other people.
A nose I paid for, by the way.
Yeah, but still...
Christy, she's my kid.
The way I treat her...
it's none of your business.
I-I was just trying to
help you get along with your daughter.
Yeah, well, thanks, but...
I don't think you're in any position
to be giving me parenting advice.
You know what,
I think I'm just gonna call it a night.
Do I have to give you a cookie now?
You know something, Fred,
you may be handsome,
charming, and successful...
...but you're also kind of a dick.
I'd say it in Italian but
I never had a semester abroad.
Well, I am back to complaining.
As a result of being sober, I have somehow become
compassionate and caring towards other people.
And, quite frankly, it's ruining my life.
You know, back when I was drinking and drugging,
I could put up with a lot of crap from guys
because I was just as bad as they were.
But now I have zero tolerance for jerks.
Which means I now have self-esteem.
Which means I'm going to die alone.
glad to be sober.
Anybody else want to share?
I'm sorry I'm so emotional, I just, uh...
I miss my people.
Mom, we're your people.
Stop saying that.
- Hey, buddy. - Hey, Mom.
Ah! Did you have a fun time with your dad and Candace?
Christy, can I talk to you for a sec?
Here, take these aspirin up to your grandma.
She's had a blinding headache for days.
So, what's up?
Well, I just wanted to say that I heard about
the breakup with my dad and I'm so sorry.