Am I supposed to carry him up the stairs?
Help him in the bathroom?
You mean like I used to do with you when you were drunk?
Yeah, yeah. Rough childhood.
Bonnie, it's just dinner.
I don't think you have to worry about any of that stuff.
Speaking of stuff.
What about his stuff?
What if his stuff doesn't work?
That doesn't mean you can't have fun.
His tongue's not in a wheelchair.
And depending on where his spinal injury was,
he might still have a fully functioning penis.
总结一下 妈咪 口♥交♥可以的
So to summarize, Mommy, oral sex is a go,
and you may or may not have something to sit on.
Oh, my God.
Could we be any more shallow?
What about this guy's personality?
His intelligence, his sense of humor.
I've actually talked to him on the phone for hours.
He's really smart and funny.
Yeah, so is Ben Franklin.
What's he look like?
Here's his Facebook page.
Oh, he's cute.
Let me see.
That's a face you could share a box with.
I could call him Daddy.
Oops, that came out creepy.
I don't know about this dress.
What? You look great.
Well, that's 'cause you're looking from up here.
He's going to be looking from down here.
So he doesn't get the benefit of all this well-engineered cleavage.
So wait for the right moment,
drop something, and bend over to pick it up.
Oh, please. That is such a cheap move.
You taught it to me.
Yeah, well, I was trying to help you through junior high.
That's him. Do you mind?
I want to make an entrance.
I got it.
- Christy? u202d- Yeah?
Don't discuss his... you know, unfortunate situation.
You mean that he's about to go out with a crazy person?
Hey. You must be Adam.
What gave me away?
Come on in.
She'll be right down.
Can I get you something to drink?
Well, I know you guys don't keep any alcohol in the house,
so, uh... no.
You're about three years late
for watching me light my breath on fire.
Thanks for showing up this time.
You're gonna take a shot right out of the gate?
It's not too late to run.
I mean, roll.
I mean... I'm sorry.
She put it in my head.
I see you've met my socially awkward daughter.
Did you get all that?
Oh, yeah. Both barrels.
Good night, Christy.
- Don't keep her out too late. - u202dI won't.
I'm joking. Keep her.
Don't bring her back.
So how does this work?
Do I drive?
No, I have a car.
How do you make it stop?
Thanks. This is perfect.
Do people always stare at you?
What are you talking about?
- They're staring at you. - u202dStop.
不 我说真的 你是个巨人
No, I'm serious. You're a giant.
They think you might eat them.
I'm gonna have a beer.
Does it bother you if I drink?
Does it bother you if I walk?
Not if you're in front of me.
I like the view from back there.
So, listen, you don't seem like the shy, nervous type.
Why'd you really bail on me last time?
Yeah, I guess I gotta clear that up.
Here's the thing.
Usually, when I meet a woman, she sees the chair right away,
and I can tell from the look in her eye
whether she's okay with it or not.
But we met on the phone.
Which is why...
I couldn't bear the idea
of you seeing me and giving me that look.
Like the woman behind you is giving me right now.
Don't turn around.
- No, don't... u202d- Hey.
Am I staring at the baldy you're with?
Is it too soon to say "I love you"?
So anyway, after working as a Hollywood stuntman for 20 some years,
I felt kind of invincible.
You know, the occasional broken nose,
but nothin' a couple of aspirin and a six-pack couldn't fix.
So is that how you...
You'd think so, but no.
After putting my life on the line,
driving motorcycles through fire,
crashing cars into walls,
working with Burt Reynolds...
I get the brilliant idea to try snowboarding.
- Oh, no. u202d- I'm thinking,
I know how to ski.
I know how to surf.
It's the same thing, right?
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