极品老妈第六季第二集

Mom S06E02

Part3

2020年1月3日 20:47

摇摆靴和曲棍球衫
go-go boots and a hockey jersey.
是真的吗
Is that true?
是的温蒂我被赶出了曲棍球比赛
Yeah, Wendy, I got kicked out of a hockey game.
我找不到我的车和裤子
I couldn't find my car or my pants.
过去一周里我买♥♥了两张乐透彩票
Over the past week, I've played lotto twice,
在网上打了打扑克
did a little online poker.
甚至和打杂工打赌我可以不说"享受"
Even bet a busboy I could work an entire shift
就上完一轮班
without saying the word "Enjoy."
我说的是吃好
So I went with mangia,
这让大家都不舒服了
but it made everyone uncomfortable.
但重点是这一切都没触发我
But the point is, none of it triggered me,
这就证明了我没有赌博上瘾
which proves I am not addicted to gambling.
你有
Yes, you are.
也许克丽丝蒂说得对
Maybe Christy's right.
我认识一个人在除夕喝个烂醉
I mean, I know someone who got really drunk
跟优步司机上♥床♥了
on New Year's Eve, slept with her Uber driver,
然后把邻居的浣熊当成了自己的猫
and mistook a neighborhood raccoon for her cat.
她那一晚既染上了疱疹又得了狂犬病
She got herpes and rabies in one night,
但她也不是酒瘾者啊
but she's not an alcoholic.
没错
There you go.
我就是她疾病缠身的朋友的赌博版
I'm the gambling version of her disease-riddled friend.
之后如果你发现你有问题
And later, if you do discover you have a problem,
那你就知道该去哪里了
you know where to go.
好吧
Well...
这张桌子旁边的所有人都可以去死了
everyone at this table can suck it.
-我就赌博了三次 -你一直这样做
- I gambled three times. - You keep saying that,
但你一直都是个堕落的赌徒
but you've always been a degenerate gambler.
你在说什么
What are you talking about?
你上三年级时
By the time you were in third grade,
你就在台球桌旁骗醉汉的钱了
you were hustling drunks at pool.
那是因为有人把公交车站的酒吧当日托中心
That's 'cause someone used the bar at the bus station as day care.
这叫举全村之力克丽丝蒂
It takes a village, Christy.
把糖浆放在冰箱里
And the syrup goes in the fridge
除非你想冒肉毒中毒的险
unless you also want to gamble with botulism.
上面写着"开盖后放入冰箱"
"Refrigerate after opening."
你就像是希望我有赌博问题一样
It's like you want me to have a gambling problem
就为了证明你说得对你在反对我
just so you can be right; you're rooting against me.
反对你
Rooting against you?
我不是站在这个厨房♥里
Did I not stand in this very kitchen
花了十小时给你做蛋糕吗
and spend ten hours making you a cake?
你即将获得法律学位
You are on your way to getting a law degree,
如果你不小心就会和那个梦想告别了
and if you're not careful you can kiss that dream good-bye.
你知道我怎么想吗我觉得你只关心
You know what I think? I think all you care about
我成为律师这样你就脱身了
is that I become a lawyer so you're off the hook.
-脱什么身 -在你扭曲的思维里
- What hook? - In your twisted mind,
如果我成功了你曾是世界上最烂的妈妈
if I become a success, then it won't matter
也就无关紧要了
that you were the world's worst mother.
猜猜怎么
Well, guess what.
你永远也无法脱身
You'll never be off the hook
无论你做了多少个难吃的蛋糕
no matter how many terrible cakes you make.
-你说过很好吃的 -我撒谎了
- You said it was delicious. - I lied!
味道像是沙拉酱
It tasted like salad dressing.
那是怎么回事
How does that happen?
家里没牛奶了
We were out of milk.
-哇 -怎么了
- Whoa. - What?
是5432美元的支票
It's a check for $5,432.
是给我的吗我的书卖♥♥了吗
Is it made out to me? Did I sell my book?
不这是超额支票
No, it's an excess check.
超额支票是什么我从哪儿弄
What the hell's an excess check, and how do I get one?
是我学生贷款中剩下的
It's left over from my student loan.
用来付学校用品和生活费用的
It's for school supplies and living expenses.
-那就给我 -不行
- Well, then give it to me. u202d- No.
-不能信任你 -不行
- You can't be trusted. - u202dNo.
天啊别闹了
Oh, my God, would you stop? Ugh!
顺说没人会买♥♥你的年轻人小说
And FYI, no one is buying your young adult novel.
你写的青少年吸血鬼已经晚了十年
You're a decade late for teenage vampires.
告诉你一句我把内容改成了青少年机器人
And FYI to you, I changed it to teenage robots.
其中一个是变性人
And one of them's transgender.
克丽丝蒂是对的吗
I mean, is Christy right?
我真的自私到
Am I really so selfish that the only reason
我希望我女儿成功的唯一原因
I want my daughter to be a success
就是让我对我的坏妈妈形象感觉好些吗
is so that I'll feel better about being a bad mom?
我想有这可能
I guess it's possible.
我知道我很自私
I mean, I know I can be selfish.
如果我忘了人们每隔十分钟就提醒我一次
And if I forget, I've got people reminding me every ten minutes.
但我想着也许这次是因为爱
But I think maybe... this time it's about love.
这很难相信吗
Is that so hard to believe?
这时候你可以说
Something one could say in this moment...
我在过去几年里
is that I have indeed changed a little
的确改变了一些
in the last couple of years.
我也会为别人做不仅对我自己有好处的事
I do things for other people that don't just benefit me.
比如说送你去看医生我可没好处
Like this ride to the doctor. Nothing in it for me.
一点都没
Nothing.
聊天都没有
Not even conversation.
你撅嘴是因为我不肯让你再开车了吗
Are you pouting because I won't let you drive again?
是的
Yep. u202d
奈德我是匿名戒瘾会的克丽丝蒂
Hi, Ned, it's Christy from GA,
我在12号♥公路旁
and, uh, I'm in the parking lot
赌场的停车场
of that casino off Highway 12.
我手里有5000块
And I've got $5,000 in my hand.
总之
So, anyway...
希望你下午愉快
hope you're having a good afternoon.
如果你有机会就给我回电
And if you have a chance, call me back.
好吧谢谢再见
Okay, thanks. Bye.
管他的
Oh, screw it.
妈妈我需要你的帮助
Mom, I need your help.
别想着赌博
Don't think about gambling.
别想着赌博
Don't think about gambling.
别想着二十一点
Don't think about blackjack.
别想着累积奖金可能
Don't think about the Wheel of Fortune slots
已经达到六位数的命运之轮老虎机
with the progressive jackpot that's probably six figures right now.
如果我就喝一杯鸡尾酒虾
What if I just have a shrimp cocktail
看其他人赌博呢
and watch other people gamble?
那会没事对吧
That'd be fine, right?
我想那没事我们走吧
I think it would be fine. Let's go!
我到了我到了
I'm here. I'm here.
谢天谢地
Oh, thank God.
我真骄傲你给我打了电♥话♥
Oh, I'm so proud of you for calling me.
钱在你手上对吗
You still got the money, right?
给我看看钱在哪
Show me the money. Where is it?
我放在后备箱里了它在跟我说话
I put it in the trunk. It was talking to me.
别以为我是不信任你
Okay, don't take this to mean I don't trust you,
但我得去看看你是否在撒谎
but I'm gonna go check if you're lying.
妈妈等等你说得对
Mom, wait. You were right.
继续
Go on.
我的确有赌博问题
I do have a gambling problem.
但只在我有钱的时候
But only when I have money.
因为我很少有钱
And since I so rarely have money,
所以这问题不常出现
it doesn't come up that often.
如果我俩都有钱那我们都可能死了
Man, if we'd been rich, we'd both be dead.
我之前说的话不公平
And what I said earlier was unfair.
你真的只是在照顾我
You really were just looking out for me.
我意识到情况并非一直都是如此
I realize that hasn't always been the case,
所以我理解你为什么有疑虑
so I get why you'd have your doubts.
你真的变了
You've really changed.
而我完全没变
And I haven't at all.
我尽快赶到了
I got here as fast as I could.
-她赌博了吗 -没有
- Did she gamble? - She did not.
很好钱在哪
Good. Where's the money?
-后备箱 -她这么说而已
- In the trunk. - u202dAllegedly.