极品老妈第六季第五集

Mom S06E05

Part3

2020年1月3日 20:48

No, that's where we buried the possum.
我去世时想被埋在花♥园♥里
When I go, I want to be buried
跟我的猫在一起
in my garden with my cats.
你有一花♥园♥的死猫吗
You have a garden full of dead cats?
我吃过那个花♥园♥里的西葫芦
I've eaten zucchini from that garden.
喵
Meow.
郑重声明你不许火葬我
For the record, you're not cremating me.
那样的话丧尸末日来临后
That way when the zombie apocalypse happens,
我会爬出坟墓吃掉你们的脸
I can crawl out of my grave and eat all your faces.
还有谁觉得有些头晕吗
Anyone else feeling a little lightheaded?
说真的谁会吸雪茄啊
Seriously, who inhales a cigar?
我是上瘾者我什么都吸
I'm an addict. I inhale everything.
那肯定不对
Well, this can't be right.
就是这里
It has to be.
他们可能绕着苹果园
Is it possible they built the Costco
建了个好市多超♥市♥吗
around the apple orchard?
它怎么可能没了
How can it just be gone?
没事的
It's okay.
发泄吧我们在呢
Let it out. We're here.
-怎么了 -她失控了
- What's happening? u202d- She's losing it.
拜托各位
Come on, you guys.
我的浪漫果园现在成了好市多超♥市♥
My romantic orchard is now a Costco.
值得大笑啊
You got to laugh.
或者哭
Or cry.
再说一次你们无法共度圣诞节生日
Again, no more Christmases, birthdays,
不小心安排两个地方吃晚饭了
accidentally setting two places at dinner.
天啊我独自一人了
Oh, God, I'm alone.
你找错目标了
You hit the wrong target.
给你芥末洋葱
Here you go. Mustard, onions.
美味
Delish.
吉尔第一次批量购买♥♥怎么样
How's Jill enjoying her first time buying in bulk?
她一开始很害怕
She was scared at first,
但刚才我看见她拿了一箱维生素E
but last I saw, she had a case of vitamin E
AA电池多到能把她的按♥摩♥棒♥送上月球
and enough AA batteries to send her vibrator to the Moon.
我们买♥♥到了最后一桶泡菜
I think we just bought our last pickle.
天啊那个桶比维克托还要大
Geez, that bucket's bigger than Victor.
妈妈
Mom.
干嘛玛乔丽从来没逗我笑过
What? Marjorie never makes me laugh.
你也该享受
You should be enjoying this.
是啊放松点
Yeah, lighten up.
实际上我觉得你太放松了
Actually, I think you're being a little too light.
那是什么意思
What's that supposed to mean?
抱歉
I'm sorry,
但对于一个带着去世丈夫骨灰的女人而言
but for a woman who's carrying around her dead husband,
你看起来并不难过
you don't seem very upset.
我当然难过
Of course I'm upset.
那你为什么不表现出来
Then why aren't you showing it?
你告诉了我们多少次
How many times
闭口不谈
have you told us keeping things bottled up
最后只会导致重新喝酒
is a great way to end up with a bottle in your hand?
天啊你真是个啄木鸟
Oh, my God, you're just like a woodpecker.
你要一直啄我
You're gonna keep pecking at me
直到我的感受和你希望的一样
until I feel the way you want me to feel.
我只是想帮忙
I was just trying to help.
想帮忙吗别管我
Want to help? Leave me alone.
-玛乔丽我真的认为 -我不想听
- Marjorie, I really think... - I don't want to hear it.
车里见
I'll be in the car.
我真的搞砸了
Really messed that up.
是的
Yes, you did.
这也许是个错误
This may have been a mistake.
你对玛乔丽说了什么
What did you say to Marjorie?
别管闲事八婆南希
Butt out, Nosey Nancy.
太过了
Hey.
我知道她说了什么
I know what she said.
那你告诉我
Then you tell me.
妈妈闭嘴
Mom, shut up.
怎么了
What's going on?
克丽丝蒂惹毛了玛乔丽
Christy pissed off Marjorie.
所以没人说话吗
Is that why no one's talking?
你觉得呢
What do you think?
有人能在《糖果传奇》里送我一条命吗
Can someone send me a life in Candy Crush?
我只是想帮忙
I was just trying to help.
抱歉我不知道那是怎么弄出来的
Sorry, I don't know how I made that happen.
天啊你们能别闹了吗
Good Lord, would you all just stop?
怎么了
What's going on?
她们在发短♥信♥说我
They're texting about me.
-什么 -才没有 -在玩《糖果传奇》
- What? - u202dNo. u202d- Candy Crush.
知道吗玛乔丽我们是在聊你
You know what, Marjorie, we were.
大家都同意我的意见
And everyone agrees with me.
-什么 -才没有 -在玩《糖果传奇》
- What? - u202dNo. u202d- Candy Crush.
该死我错过了所有的情节
Damn, I'm missing all the action.
所以我需要自动驾驶汽车
This is why I need one of those self-driving cars.
还有自动驾驶汽车吗
There are self-driving cars?
我在监狱里待了多久
How long was I in prison?
好吧玛乔丽我闭嘴
Fine, Marjorie, I'll shut up.
以你希望的方式哀悼吧
Go ahead and grieve any way you want.
我没有哀悼那就是问题所在
I'm not grieving. That's the problem.
终于承认了
Finally!
我是说继续
I mean... go on.
你知道当我听到这消息时
You know what my first feeling was
我的第一个感受是什么吗
when I heard the news?
我脑子的第一个想法
First thing that went through my head?
松了口气
Relief.
不是惊讶悲伤是松了口气
Not shock. Not sadness. Relief.
那可以理解维克托很痛苦
That's totally understandable. Victor was suffering.
不我是为了自己松了口气
No, I was relieved for me.
你们不知道有多少次我把车停在门口
You don't know how many times I pulled up to the house
不想进去
and didn't want to go inside.
我感觉自己是禽兽
I felt like a monster.
你怎么是禽兽
How were you a monster?
你总是陪着他
You were always there for him.
那我有什么问题
Then what's wrong with me?
我为我家猫都哭得更多
I cried more over my cat.
这点我们讨论过了
There was some discussion of that.
玛乔丽我在医院经常看见这种情况
Marjorie, I see this a lot at the hospital.
人们生病很久时
u202dWhen people are sick for a long time,
他们还没去世家人就开始哀悼了
their families mourn them long before they're gone.
150英里前你怎么不说这话
Where was that nugget 150 miles ago?
我实际上说过但你们都没理我
I actually said it, but you all talked over me.
关键是这并不意味着你不关心
The point is, it doesn't mean you didn't care.
谢谢你温蒂这很有帮助
Thank you, Wendy. That's helpful.
等等
Wait a minute.
她有帮助我没有吗
She's helpful, and I'm not?
今天你不顺啊啄木鸟
Not your day, woodpecker.
那么
So...
经历了六小时的车程结果他就到了
six-hour drive, and he just ended up
厨房♥里的另一个地方
in a different part of the kitchen.
维克托有第二最喜欢的地方吗
Did Victor have a second favorite place?
是啊他在做浪漫的事的路上
Yeah, did he run over any other animals
碾过了其它动物吗
on the way to doing something romantic?
我觉得我要暂时把他放在这里
I think I'm gonna keep him here for now.
放在糖罐和面粉罐旁边吗
Next to the sugar and flour?
看来你要做出不好的饼干了
That's a bad biscuit waiting to happen.
我没准备好让他离开
I'm just not ready to let him go.
你需要多少时间都可以
Take all the time you need.
我会的
I will.
谢谢
Thank you.
帮上忙了
Helpful.
我真幸运能拥有你们
I'm really lucky to have you.
你们所有人
All of you.
失陪了波兹·斯加格斯需要一点爱