《极品老妈》前情提要
Previously on Mom...
天啊 怎么了
Oh, my God, what?
我在上网球课呢
I'm in the middle of a tennis lesson.
我妈妈被逮捕了
My mom just got arrested,
我需要借你两千保释她
and I need to borrow two grand for bail.
天啊 克丽丝蒂 你拿亚当的钱赌博了
God, Christy, you gambled Adam's money?
是的
I did.
然后我给吉尔打了电♥话♥
So then I called Jill.
你又拿吉尔的钱赌博了吗
And you gambled Jill's money, too?
上一周 我赌博输掉了我朋友的四千美元
Uh, this past week, I gambled away $4,000 of my friends' money
害我妈妈被困在监狱
and stranded my mom in a jail cell.
吉尔 我又拿来了一些欠你的钱
Oh, Jill. I've got some more of the money that I owe you.
第三次付款
Payment number three.
谢谢 克丽丝蒂
Thank you, Christy.
只剩37次了
Only 37 to go.
现在
12点半有场关于外星人的电影
Oh, there's a 12:30 matinee about the aliens who...
不 两个女人意识到她们在和
No. Ooh, how 'bout the two women
-同一个男人约会的电影怎么样 -不
- who realize they're dating the same man? - No.
-有新的汤姆... -不
- There's the new Tom... - No.
-等等 汉克斯还是克鲁斯 -汉克斯
- Oh, wait a minute. Hanks or Cruise? - Hanks.
-不 -克鲁斯
- No. - Cruise?
不
No.
女儿很希望安静
How 'bout the one where the daughter is so desperate for quiet,
用法律书砸母亲的电影怎么样
she beats her mother with a law book?
我不喜欢纪录片
I don't like documentaries.
走吧 我们路上再商量看什么
Come on, we'll argue about the movie on the way.
最近有人绑♥架♥过
Hey, has anyone kidnapped a member
连恩·尼逊的家人吗
of Liam Neeson's family lately?
我倒希望有 得等到圣诞节
I wish. Not till Christmas.
塔米 你在做什么
Uh, Tammy, what are you doing?
我的润唇膏掉到了书架下
Oh, my ChapStick rolled under the bookcase,
所以我拖了出来 发现了污渍
so I pulled it out and spotted a stain here.
完全坦白 我找到了一美元
Full disclosure, I found a dollar.
总之 看起来像水渍
Anyway, it looks like water damage.
是的 所以我们才放书架在那里
Yeah, that's why we keep the bookcase there.
实际上 家里的每件家具
In fact, every piece of furniture
都是在遮丑
in here is hiding something.
你以为我们想把桌子放那吗
You think we wanted to put a desk over there?
但水渍可能会很严重
But water damage could be serious.
我相信是的 但我涂上油漆
I'm sure it is, but when I paint over it,
就会消失六个月
it goes away for six months.
好 我们去看电影
Okay, we're going to a movie.
谢谢 我不能去
Oh, thanks, I can't come.
-真可惜 -下次吧
- Oh, that's too bad. - Maybe next time.
好 玩得愉快
All right, have fun.
你必须那样做吗
Do you need to do that?
当然了 一定要检查水渍
Sure do. Checking for water damage.
它是无声杀手
It's the silent killer.
没那么无声
Not very silent.
听 你能听出不同的音调
Listen, can you hear the different tones?
我只听见了我从法学院辍学的声音
All I hear is me flunking out of law school.
或许还有霉菌
Might be some mold, too.
这能解释你的头疼
Could explain your headaches.
我不头疼
I don't have headaches.
真的吗 你是无缘无故做那表情的吗
Really? So you just make that face for no reason?
听着 我知道你只是想帮忙
Look, I know you just want to help out,
我们很感激 但我在努力学习
and we appreciate it, but I'm trying to study.
收到 追寻梦想
Roger that. Pursuit of the dream.
天啊 这墙就像白软干酪
Man, this wall's like cottage cheese.
糟了
Whoops.
天啊
Oh, my God,
快把手拔♥出♥来♥
get your hand out of there.
你确定你不头疼吗
Are you sure you don't have headaches?
因为你又做那表情了
'Cause there's that face again.
极品老妈 第六季第六集
我通常不喜欢动作片
I don't usually like action movies,
但刚那部还挺好看的
but that was kind of fun.
他们的所谓"特技"让我毫无兴趣
Eh, they lost me with the so-called stunts.
全都是电脑特效
"It was all computer graphics."
全都是电脑特效
It was all computer graphics.
在我那个年代
I mean, in my day,
当你在喷气战斗机机翼上打斗时
when you fought on the wing of a jet fighter,
你是真的在喷气战斗机机翼上打斗
you really fought on the wing of a jet fighter.
你做过吗
Did you do that?
飞的时候肯定不能做
Well, not while it was moving.
那太危险了
That'd be too dangerous.
那家伙在脖子上文身
Ooh, that guy's getting a neck tattoo.
文的是"错误"吗
Is it the word "Mistake"?
看看 祖父母来文身了
Hey, check it out, Grandma and Grandpa are getting inked.
他们是在说我们吗
Were they talking about us?
你看到其他祖父母了吗
Do you see their grandparents around?
喂 我们没那么老
Hey! Hey, we're not that old.
提好你们的裤子
And pull up your pants.
你为什么不叫他们"自以为是的小年轻"呢
Why don't you just call him "Whippersnapper"?
去他们的 我们依然很酷
Screw them. We're still cool.
你猜怎么着 我们文身吧
You know what? Let's get tattoos.
为什么 刻薄男孩已经走了
Why? The mean boys are gone.
不是为了他们 是为了我们 来吧
Not for them, for us. Come on.
你难道没这个愿望吗
Tell me it's not on your bucket list.
我不需要文身 我有冰激凌
I-I don't really need a tattoo. I got ice cream.
拜托 情侣文身 会很浪漫的
Please? His and her tattoos. It'll be so romantic.
或者我们可以回家做♥爱♥
Or we could go home and make love.
现在塔米扒掉了整面墙
And now Tammy's got the whole wall torn apart.
就像是世界上最悲催的装♥修♥节目
It's like the world's saddest home remodeling show.
瞧啊 依然是垃圾堆
Ta-da, it's still a dump.
别对别人说 我很怕她
Between us, she scares me.
-真的吗 她很喜欢你 -她最棒了
- Really? She loves you. - Aw, she's the best.
总之
Anyway,
在这里学多久都行
study here as long as you like.
谢谢 塔米说只会花几天
Thanks. Tammy said it's only gonna be a couple of days.
亲爱的 我知道施工的事
Oh, honey, I know how construction goes.
不管是装新胸还是新厕所
Whether it's new boobs or a new bathroom,
总是会花更久 而且比他们说得更遭罪
it always takes longer and hurts way more than they tell you.
这很棒
Well, this is amazing.
等等 先别坐
Whoa, whoa, whoa, don't sit down yet.
第二个地巾不在 贝琳达
The second foot towel isn't in place. Belinda?
来了
Flying in.
我觉得一个地巾就够用了
Oh, I-I think I can scrape by with one foot towel.
一般人都会这样想
One would think.
还有事吗 女士
Anything else, ma'am?
把我二十分钟前要的蓝莓奶昔拿来
Just the blueberry blend that I asked for 20 minutes ago.
她最棒了
Isn't she great?
就像我在让魔法保姆给我拿奶昔
It's like I got Mary Poppins bringing me smoothies.
你要什么吗
You need anything?
不要 只要安静
No, just some quiet.
是的 这里是工作的完美地点
Yeah, well, this is a perfect place to work.
曾在这里读过书
Read a book out here once.
原来罗伯·劳人生艰辛
Turns out Rob Lowe had a hard life.
天啊
Oh, my God.
这些毛巾是什么做的 猫咪吗
What are these towels made of, kittens?
享受吧 失陪了
Enjoy. Now, if you'll excuse me,
我得去换衣服了
I got to go change.
-为什么 -两点了
- For what? - It's 2:00.
我很高兴我们在做这个
I'm so glad we're doing this.
我也是 太好玩了
Me, too. This is super fun.
你文好了吗
You almost done back there?
没有 刚文了"邦妮"的一横
No, just finishing the B in "Bonnie."
你在开玩笑吗 我得歇歇
Are you kidding? I need a break.
我能再喝一杯果汁吗
A-And can I have another juice?
拜托 胆小鬼 我以为你很坚强
Come on, you big wuss. I thought you were tough.