You can either keep listening to the podcast
可怜自己 或者你可以给她打电♥话♥
and feel sorry for yourself, or you could just call her.
你说得对
You're right.
好 你只有一个选择
Okay, you have one choice.
我怎么给她打电♥话♥ 我都没她号♥码
How can I call her? I don't even have her number.
她换了 因为如果你忘了的话
She changed it, because-- in case you forgot--
我是问题之母
I am the Mother of All Problems.
-我有她的号♥码 -什么
- I have her number. - What?
播客又不叫"问题之姥"
Well, it's not called The Grandmother of All Problems.
实际上 你应该用我的手♥机♥打 这样她会接
In fact, you should call her from my phone. That way she'll answer.
-天啊 你真狡猾 -你在等什么
- God, you're shady. - What are you waiting for?
我要想清楚我该说什么
I need to figure out what I'm gonna say first.
别想了 说发自内心的话
Don't think about it. Just speak from your heart.
而且正在拨♥打♥中
Also, it's ringing.
太好了 语♥音♥信箱
Oh, good. Voice mail.
别发你总是发的怪声
Just don't do that weird thing you always do.
什么怪声 维奥莉特
What weird thing? Hi! Violet!
是我 你妈妈
It's me, your mom.
那么 嘟哒嘟
Uh... so, doot-dah-doo...
就是这个怪声
That's the weird thing.
我听了你的播客
So, heard your podcast.
我想和你谈谈那个播客
Would love to chitty-chat about that.
或任何事
Or anything.
我很久没和你说过话了
I haven't talked to you in such a long time.
当然了 换电♥话♥的人不是我
Of course, I'm not the one who changed her number.
但我不是怪你
But not pointing fingers.
嘟哒嘟
Doot-dah-doo.
好消息
Hey, good news.
我现在上了法学院
I'm in law school now.
是的 在学《侵权法》[果酱饼]
Yep. Learnin' about torts.
原来那不只指甜点
Turns out they're not just dessert.
快说完
Wrap it up.
好的
Okay, well, uh...
是我 你妈妈 克丽丝蒂
it's me, your mom, Christy.
语♥音♥信息结束
End of voice mail.
天啊 我错了 你应该提前想好
Boy, I was wrong-- you should have thought about it first.
这里看起来真棒
This place looks fantastic!
比我们的梦想还好
It's even better than we dreamed it.
我犯了个大错
I made a huge mistake.
我不会还你戒指的
Well, I'm not giving the ring back.
酒吧永远不可能成功的 女士
The bar. This is never gonna work, lady.
这是怎么回事
What happened here?
我在选啤酒
I was picking beers.
通过试喝
By drinking them.
必须来很多人 花很多钱
So many people are gonna have to come in this place
这地方才可能成功
and spend so much money for this joint to work.
这把椅子
This chair...
每周必须赚一千美元
has to bring in a thousand dollars a week,
还有这把椅子 这把椅子
and-and this chair and this chair...
没人会坐那把椅子
and nobody's gonna want to sit in that chair,
因为正好在空调下
'cause it's right under the air conditioning.
亲爱的 我觉得你只是
Aw, honey, I think you're just having
开业前有点紧张 非常正常
a case of pre-opening jitters. Completely normal.
我没有经验 花光了所有钱
I have no experience, and I spent all of my money.
我为什么这样做
Why would I do that?
这正是我...
Well, that's exactly what...
好吧
Okay.
当我问你那个问题时
When I asked you that very question,
你自信地回答说你有一个
you confidently replied that you have a dream
对你很重要的梦想
that's important to you,
你希望你的人生再次拥有目标
and you want to feel like your life has purpose again.
"目标"听起来像"海豚"
"Purpose" Sounds like "Porpoise."
老板 你的杯垫到了
Hey, boss, your coasters just arrived.
我买♥♥了一万个 一万个啊
Ugh. I bought 10,000 of 'em-- 10,000!
-送货员要支票 -现在不行
- The delivery guy needs a check, so... u202d- Not now!
家庭狗血 我去和他调情
Oh. Family drama. I'll go flirt with him.
你知道我得卖♥♥多少杯酒
Do you know how many drinks I have to sell
才能用掉一万个杯垫吗
to use 10,000 coasters?
一万杯吗
Ten thousand?
我不知道 大概吧
I don't know, maybe.
看着我
Look at me.
亚当 看着我
Adam, look at me.
你克服过比开酒吧更大的困难
You have overcome far bigger obstacles than opening a bar.
你曾是个成功的好莱坞特技演员
You were a successful Hollywood stuntman.
多少人能这样说呢
How many people can say that?
你从糟糕的事故中走了出来
You fought your way back from a terrible accident.
多少人能这样说呢
How many people can say that?
你和我谈了成功的恋爱
You are in a successful relationship with me,
我可以告诉你 没人能这样说
and I can tell you, no one has ever been able to say that.
我雇了女服务员
I hired waitresses.
我雇了男酒保
I hired a bartender.
雇他们都是要花钱付工资的
They're gonna want to be paid-- with money.
你会成功的
You're gonna make it work,
你不是独自一人
and you're not gonna do it alone.
我知道 我雇了女服务员
I know. I hired waitresses.
我雇了男酒保 我...
I hired a bartender. I... Now...
闭嘴
zip, zip, zip it.
重点是 这个酒吧会非常成功
The point is this bar is gonna be a huge success.
会爆红
It's gonna blow up!
对 我们可以爆破了这里 拿保险金
Yes. We could blow it up and collect the insurance money.
太荒谬了
That's ridiculous.
而且那比你想的难多了
It's also much more difficult than you think.
好 华盛顿州诉国际鞋业公♥司♥案 开始
Okay, State of Washington v. International Shoe. Go.
史黛西
Stacy.
我本来不想说
I wasn't gonna say anything,
但我知道你是谁
but I know who you are.
你是问题之母
You're the Mother of All Problems.
该死
Son of a bitch.
你怎么知道的
How'd you find out?
我猜你没听今天的播客
I guess you haven't listened to today's podcast.
我妈妈给我留了语♥音♥信息
So, my mom left me a voice mail.
我不知道她是真心的 还是想操纵人心
I can't tell if it's sincere or deeply manipulative.
你们来决定吧
So you decide.
不
Oh, no.
维奥莉特
Hi! Violet!
是我 你妈妈
It's me, your mom.
那么
So, um...
嘟哒嘟
doot-dah-doo...
关掉
Turn it off.
我知道现在问这个不合适
I... know this may not be the best time to ask,
但你真的带她去参加生日派对
but did you really take her to a birthday party
然后走了两天都没回来吗
and not come back for two days?
是啊 但那家人
Yes. But the family I left her with
在那个周末让她第一次吃到寿司了呢
gave her sushi for the first time that weekend.
她提到了吗
Does she mention that?
我在问你呢 她提到了吗
I'm asking. Does she mention that?
抱歉
Sorry.
史黛西
Wow. Stacy. Well,
我得告诉你 你回来了 摩托车也回来了
I got to tell you, you're back and the motorcycle's back.
如果那真的不是你的 那就有人在跟踪你
If it's really not yours, somebody's following you.
天啊 你是救命稻草
Oh, my God, you're the Life Preserver.
是啊 你想合照吗
Yes, I am. Would you like a picture?
好
Yes.
亲爱的 你介意吗
Honey, do you mind?
靠在一起
Scrunch together.
我还以为我留言是给她一个人的
I thought I was leaving that voice mail for one person,
而不是给全世界
not everyone in the world.
我有个问题
I have a question.
嘟哒嘟是什么
What's "Doot-dah-doo"?
现在不是时候 吉尔
Not now, Jill.
我想着我戒瘾后