Yeah, my address is the booth with the woman waving.
谁啊
Yeah?
邦妮 怎么了
Hey, Bonnie, what's happening?
到底是怎么了
What is happening?
你们聊到了尊巴
You gals talking about Zumba
我就想拿出了我的爵士健美操录像带
inspired me to get out my old Jazzercise tapes.
有很多可嘲笑的 但我需要你的建议
There's a lot to mock here, but I need your advice.
塔米的事让我
This thing with Tammy is driving me...
得把这个拿掉
Okay, we need to lose this.
我不知道该做什么
I just don't know what to do.
她会心碎的 我很担心她
She's gonna get her heart broken and I'm worried about her.
怎么了
u202dWhat?
我在花一刻时间享受
I'm taking a moment to enjoy
你在担心除你之外的人
that you're worrying about somebody other than yourself.
你真的改变了
You've really changed.
谢谢
Oh. Thank you.
这个给你 蛮湿的
You can have this back. It's actually kind of wet.
问题是这样的
Okay, here's the deal,
我知道什么对塔米来说最好
I know what's best for Tammy.
我怎么才能让她听我的
How do I get her to listen to me?
你不知道什么对她最好 邦妮
You don't know what's best for her, Bonnie.
她得有自己的经历
She has to have her own experiences.
你唯一能做的就是分享你的经历 前提是她问你
The only thing you can do is share yours, if she asks.
-但她没问我 -那就闭嘴
- But she's not asking. - Well, then shut up.
你闭嘴
You shut up.
抱歉 你继续说
Sorry, you were saying?
你刚开始和亚当约会时
You know, when you started dating Adam,
我觉得你犯了个大错
I thought you were making a big mistake.
亚当怎么了
What's wrong with Adam?
我只是不喜欢他
Well, I just didn't like him,
我觉得你没准备好
and I didn't think you were ready,
但你证明我错了 因为你
but you proved me wrong because you are
很棒地处理了这段感情
handling this relationship so beautifully.
谢谢 你不喜欢他哪一点
Thank you. What exactly didn't you like about him?
他有些招摇 我不大喜欢
Well, he had a certain swagger I didn't appreciate,
显然 在你之前 他有些花心
and apparently, before you, he was a bit of a tomcat.
招摇 这个词用得妙 他真傲慢
"Swagger"? That's a great way to put it. So arrogant.
我的重点是 我错了
My point is, I was wrong.
我不确定你错了
I'm not sure you were.
我们一直都碰上他的前女友
We're running into ex-girlfriends all the time.
-邦妮 听着 -威廉姆斯-索诺玛公♥司♥
- Bonnie, listen... - Williams-Sonoma,
我这辈子第一次买♥♥漂亮的盘子
I am buying nice plates for the first time in my life,
是谁包装的
and who's wrapping them up?
带着假指甲的杰奎琳
Jaqueline with her big, fake fingernails.
你那时候为什么不告诉我呢
Why didn't you tell me this back then?
你没问我的意见
You didn't ask for my opinion,
就像是塔米没问你的意见
like Tammy hasn't asked for yours.
好吧 懂了
Fine, fine, got it.
好 如果你不介意
Okay. Now if you don't mind,
我想继续跳爵士健美操了
I would like to go back to Jazzercise.
你想加入吗
Would you like to join me?
我不想 但我绝对想看
I would not, but I definitely want to watch.
你还好吗
Hi. You okay?
没事 我跳爵士健美操时拉伤肌肉了
Uh, yeah, I just pulled a muscle Jazzercising.
顺便说一次 你的屁♥股♥似乎着火了
By the way, your ass appears to be on fire.
好吧 被你抓到了 说教提示
Fine, caught me. Cue the lecture.
我不说教
No lecture.
拜托 你不认为
Oh, come on, you don't think
这是自我毁灭的行为吗
this is self-destructive behavior?
亲爱的
Oh, honey,
我懂 我也经历了
I get it. I went through the whole
"想办法在戒瘾的同时调皮"的阶段
"Finding ways to be naughty in sobriety" thing.
实际上 我戒瘾五年时
In fact, when I had about five years,
深深爱上了马文
I developed a massive crush on Marvin,
我跟他有咖啡承诺
the guy that I had the coffee commitment with.
劲爆啊
Ooh.
不劲爆 他结婚了 我也是
No, not "Ooh." He was married and so was I.
-更劲爆了 -嗯
- Ooh. u202d- Yeah.
我们只是调情 但是
All we did was flirt, but...
这让我觉得很激动
it did give me a thrill,
那时候我真的很需要
and at the time, I really needed that.
然后怎么了
So what happened?
我继续进行戒瘾 他也是
Oh, I kept working the program, and so did he,
我们变得更好 调情停止了
and we got better and the flirting stopped.
还有 有一晚他穿了牛仔马甲
Also, one night he wore a denim vest.
我的马文和我还在调情
Well, my Marvin and I are still flirting.
好吧 里面见
Okay. I'll see you inside.
我想证明什么啊
What was I trying to prove?
好啊 邦妮
Hi, Bonnie.
好啊 塔米
Hi, Tammy.
我给你打来电♥话♥ 是因为我欠你个道歉
I'm calling 'cause I owe you an apology.
我对你太严厉了
I was too hard on you.
你并不可悲
You're not pathetic
我说你迷恋上了瑞克是不对的
and I was wrong to say you were obsessing about Rick.
谢谢 大酱 这意义重大 我原谅你
Thanks, Big Sauce, that means a lot. You're forgiven.
好 你在忙什么
Good. So what are you up to?
我坐在瑞克家对面的街上
I'm sitting across the street from Rick's house.
是吗
Are you?
我带了望远镜
And I may have binoculars.
好吧
Uh-huh.
我是不是跟我觉得的一样疯狂
Am I as crazy as I feel?
-你在问我的意见吗 -是的
- Are you asking my opinion? - I am.
你到底在哪里
Where are you exactly?
你叫了优步车来跟踪男人吗
You took an Uber to stalk a guy?
你不知道我不开车
You know I don't drive.
-邦妮 这是尤里 尤里 这是邦妮 -晚上好
- Bonnie, Yuri. Yuri, Bonnie. - Good evening.
你要薄荷糖 水 充电器吗
Uh, would you like to have mint, water, phone charger?
不用
I'm fine.
你为什么这样做 来都来了
Why are you doing this? Eh, as long as I'm here.
瑞克还没有回我消息
I still hadn't heard from Rick,
所以我去家得宝跟他打招呼
so I went to Home Depot to say hi,
他走开了 说他得去第三通道干活
and he walks away and says he has to do something in aisle three,
我跟着他去了第三通道
so I follow him to aisle three
结果他什么也没做 所以我对他说
and he's not doing anything. So I say to him,
你什么也没做
"You're not doing anything,"
他说 我现在没法聊天
and he says, "I can't talk right now.
我回家后给你打电♥话♥
I'll call you later when I get home."
六个小时过去了 没打电♥话♥
Six hours go by, no call,
所以我来看看他是否回家了
so I came to see if he's home.
他回家了
He's home!
可以清楚地看到 他穿着四角裤在吃披萨
He can clearly be seen eating pizza in his boxers.
我该怎么做
So what do I do?
根据我的经验
In my experience,
如果他宁愿穿着内♥裤♥自己吃饭
if a guy would rather eat alone in his underwear,
那他对你没兴趣
he's not interested.
-我知道 -是吗
- I know. u202d- You do?
我只是不想承认
I just didn't want to admit it to myself.
你前面的袋子里有纸巾
Tissues are in pocket in front of you.
我这辈子都要单身了
I'm gonna be single the rest of my life.
不会 我做过更糟糕的事
No, you're not. I have done way worse than this.
坐在他家外算什么
Sitting outside his house?
试试搬去他的阁楼
Try moving into his attic
长达三周 同时他还不知情
without him knowing for three weeks.
你没有这样做
You didn't really do that.
我做过 有个网站警告人们注意我
Sure did. There was a website warning people about me.
但我现在要结婚了
But now I'm getting married,
我没有过去那么疯狂
and I'm not as crazy as I used to be,
我找到了一个男人 他喜欢我内心依然存在的疯狂
and I found a guy who loves the crazy that's still there.
你会学到教训 下次
You're gonna learn from this, and next time,
你会做不同的事
you'll do it differently.
如果还有下次