威尔和格蕾丝第九季第一集

Will & Grace S09E01

Part1

2020年2月16日 09:30

Okay, he's a man, but he's aged into a lesbian.
是个男的但越老长得越像女同
Steven Tyler! Jon Voight!
斯蒂文·泰勒乔恩·沃伊特
Newt Gingrich! Yes.
纽特·金瑞奇对了
Okay.
好的
She's don't get me started.
她...别让我开口否则停不下来
Jada Pinkett Smith. Yes.
贾达·萍克特·史密斯对了
We want to love her, but she makes it impossible.
我们想爱她可她让我们爱不起来
Caitlyn Jenner. Of course.
凯特琳·詹纳当然了
Rich, hostage.
有钱人质
Melania. Beret.
梅拉尼亚贝雷帽
Patty Hearst! Yes!
帕蒂·赫斯特对了
You guys are up.
到你们上了
Grindr has gotten so skanky.
基达这软件越来越恶心了
I feel like I could get finger herpes just from scrolling.
我觉得用手指在上面滑动都能染上性病
Ooh, there's a gay guy within ten feet from oh.
有个基佬离我不到3米...是你啊
Can we play? Okay. Patience, darling, patience.
能开始玩了吗行行耐心亲爱的耐心
Grace, you need to take my new profile pic, okay?
格蕾丝你得帮我拍张新的头像好吗
But wait until I do something adorbs.
不过要抓拍到我萌萌的表情
Come on, Kare, it's our turn.
快凯凯该我们了
Kare?
凯凯
Is she asleep? Wait, it could be a trap.
她睡着了吗等等可能是圈套
A smaller Karen might shoot out of her mouth
小版凯伦可能从她嘴里蹦出来
and bite your face off.
咬掉你的脸
I got this.
我来搞定
What's going on?
怎么了
What's happening? Who won the election?
什么情况谁赢了大选
Your guy.
你的人
Oh, I had the craziest dream.
我刚做了个超疯狂的梦
You were there, and you were there...
你在你也在
You weren't.
你不在
Hello, Grace, I was just giving you full adorable,
喂格蕾丝我刚刚的表情就超萌
and you missed it!
你完全错过了
In the dream, Will was living with a swarthy man in uniform,
梦里威尔和一个黑黝黝的制服男生活在一起
and Grace was married to a Jew doctor.
格蕾丝嫁给了一个犹太医生
Yeah, well, we were. But we're single now.
那是现实之前确实如此但我们现在单身了
That tracks.
那就能说得通了
What happened to the children you had
你们两个那长大后
who grew up and got married to each other?
走进婚姻殿堂的的小孩后来怎么了
That never happened. Oh, what a relief!
没这回事真是松了口气
Nobody wants to see you two raise kids.
没人想看你们两个养育孩子
Yeah, I mean, what would be funny about that?
是啊那就太无趣了
But you're not still living together.
但你们没有住在一起吧
Oh, no. I mean, I mean
没有我是说
she's living here right now. S staying here.
她现在是住在这儿暂住
Staying... For just a couple of weeks until the dust settles.
暂住几个星期等尘埃落定
On your genitals?
等你的生殖器落灰吗
On my divorce.
是我的离婚尘埃落定
Because of your genitals.
离婚也是因为你的生殖器
Wait a minute, wait a minute. What about Stan?
等等等等斯坦呢
Is he still alive? Am I still rich?
他还活着吗我还有钱吗
Answer the last one first.
先回答最后一个问题
You're rich, Stan's alive,
你还有钱斯坦还活着
both single, no kids.
都是单身没有小孩
Got it?
拍到了吗
Got it.
拍到了
Are you writing another angry letter to that congressman?
你又在给那个国会议员写抗议信吗
Wow, you are so good.
你好厉害
Eh, people throw around the word "hero" too much.
"英雄"一词的使用频率太高了
I didn't say "hero."
我没有说"英雄"
There's that word again.
你又说了
Is that him? Mm.
这是他吗嗯
"Congressman Steve Sandoval."
"国会议员斯蒂夫·桑德沃"
I hate it when bad guys are handsome.
我讨厌坏人长得帅
It's like Scar in "Lion King."
就像《狮子王》里的刀疤
What?
什么
Who cares what he looks like?
没人关心他长什么样
He's trying to gut the EPA.
他想拿美国环境保护署开刀
I am so impressed.
你真让我刮目相看
You are so woke.
你真关心时政
I used to be woke.
我以前也很关心时政
Now I use my pussy hat to sneak candy into the movies.
如今我用我的粉色猫帽偷偷带糖进电影院
Get back into it. Write your representative.
那就继续关心啊给你的议员写信
I should write. Why don't you?
我应该写的为什么不写
I don't wanna write.
我不想写
I'm so busy! What can I do that's low effort, high impact?
我忙死了有什么不用费力却影响巨大的事吗
Fart in an elevator? That was not me!
在电梯里放屁那次不是我放的
That is fake news.
那是假新闻
Hi, it's your assistant, Anastasia Beaverhausen.
你好我是你的助理安娜斯塔莎·比弗豪森
I have to tell you about my conversation with Melania
我必须跟你说说我和梅拉尼亚的对话
you know, the wife of your president?
你知道的就是你们总统的老婆
By the way, I signed your name to his birthday card. Bye!
顺便说下我在给他的生日贺卡上签了你的名字拜
She never stops rubbing it in my face.
她老是故意刺激我
Yeah, but does she ever bring up the election?
好吧但她提过选举的事吗
No, she tortures me, constantly.
不她持续不断地折磨我
I know what I can do.
我知道我能做什么了
I can put my foot down with her in the office.
我在办公室可以对她强硬一点
No more gloating.
不许再幸灾乐祸
No more screaming "lock her up!"
不许再尖叫"把她关起来"
when I wear something she doesn't like.
就因为我穿的衣服她不喜欢
Well, there you go. It's just what you wanted,
这就对了那正是你想要的
You know? Effort is low,
对吧不用怎么费力
and you're impacting a person who's high.
却能影响一个嗑药酗酒精神恍惚的人
Not hungry, couldn't eat a thing.
不饿什么都吃不下
What are you in the mood for, Jack?
你想吃什么杰克
French toast.
法式吐司
I am off, boys. Thank you for inspiring me.
我走了帅哥们谢谢你给我灵感
Who talks like that?
谁会那样说话啊
Okay, who's the guy?
老实交代那野男人是谁
Your lips are pursed, your neck is flushed,
你嘴唇微撅脖子泛红
and you're presenting.
挺胯秀"鸡"
I am writing a protest letter to a congressman
我在给一个议员写抗议信
about issues that matter...
事关重要的问题...
in my pants. I knew it!
我裤裆里的问题我就知道
I knew it! I knew it!
我就知道我就知道
How hot is he on the Ryan scale?
他的「瑞恩性感指数」有多少分
He's a Reynolds point Gosling.
他跟瑞恩·高斯林一样帅
Okay. Grace thinks it's all political,
好的格蕾丝以为这仅与政治有关
but we're totally flirting.
但其实我们在调情
Okay, Shonda, now we got a scandal.
珊达大妈这下我们可有丑闻了
Hey, look.
你瞧
There he is. And he is the worst
这就是他他最坏了
votes against every environmental regulation.
给所有环保法规投反对票
Okay, I get it.
好我懂了
You wanna hook up with a power gay.
你想勾搭一个有权势的基佬
It's called an "Anderson Cooper."
那叫「安德森·库珀」
It used to be called an "Elton John,"
以前叫「艾尔顿·约翰」
and before that, an "Abraham Lincoln."
再之前是叫「亚伯拉罕·林肯」
Wait, wait, wait, is it...
等等等等
Isn't it hypocritical to hook up with someone
勾搭一个和我几乎所有观点
that I disagree with on virtually everything?
都相悖的人不是很虚伪吗
Will, do you know how many men I've been with
威尔你知道我睡过多少个
who I disagree with politically?
和我政治观点相悖的人吗
I don't.
我不知道
'Cause I don't ask! You just pop out your contacts
因为我从来不问你摘掉隐形眼镜
and you get to work.
直接开操就行了
It's not like I'm ever gonna meet this guy anyway.
反正我又没机会和这家伙见面
Okay, I know exactly what to do.
我知道该怎么做
All right? Here we go.
好吗看我的
Facebook的主页 And going to his Facebook page...
先打开他
and going to his calendar...
然后找到日程表