善地第三季第一集

The Good Place S03E01

Part1

2020年2月16日 09:30

《善地》前情提要
我还是相信他们会成为好人
I still believe that they would have become good people
前提是把他们往正确的方向上推一把
if they'd just gotten a push in the right direction.
不行
No!
-他们说什么呢 -不知道
- What are they talking about? - No idea.
就只有四个人
It's only four people,
而也只有这样才能看清
and it's clearly the best way to see
如果坏人不知道自己死后会有什么结果
if bad people can become good without knowing anything about
还能不能转变成为一个好人
what's waiting for them in the afterlife.
-好吧那就这么办了 -太棒了
- Okay, let's do it. - Yes!
但必须要有严格的规矩
But there have to be strict rules.
否则结果就会不公正
Otherwise, the results will be tainted,
我保留随时改变主意的权利
and I reserve the right to change my mind at any point.
有没有哪位不是神仙
Would someone who's not an eternal being
跟我解释一下...
please explain to me what the f--
我是迈克尔
Hi, I'm Michael.
你就是"看门人"吧
You must be the Doorman.
看门人
太刺♥激♥了
This is wild.
我之前都不知道真有这么个地方
I had no idea this was even here.
这是法官的判决书
So I have this ruling from the Judge.
派我去地球拯救这四个人类
Heading on down to Earth to reverse the deaths of these four people.
是挺棘手
It's kind of tricky, you know?
这会开启新的时间线
It starts up a new timeline,
可能会引发连锁反应
so there might be some ripple effects.
但为了我们的实验必须如此
But it's necessary for the experiment that we're doing there.
多久能到地球希望别给我一个中间的座椅
So, how long's this trip take? Hope I don't get a middle seat.
我八千年没听人讲笑话了
I haven't heard a joke in 8,000 years.
你这个梗真是太冷了
And I still haven't.
批准
那扇门就通往地球
That's the door to Earth.
能带你穿越到任何地方
You go through there, you'll be wherever you need to be.
但你到达之后法力就没了
You won't have any other powers, though.
你想去哪里只能搭乘公交车了
You want to get around, you're just going to have to take a bus or something.
公交车
A bus?
天啦噜
Boy, man!
我一定要试试看面向前的座椅
I'm going to sit in a front-facing seat.
也要试试能看两边风景的座椅
Or--or no, maybe a sideways-facing seat.
我要体验一把晕车的感觉
I'm--I'm going to get so motion sick!
天啦噜
Man!
要怎么做拿上这把钥匙...
What do I do, just grab that key here--
这把钥匙由宇宙中出现的第一个原子所打造
This key is made of the very first atoms that came into existence in the universe.
独一无二不可复♥制♥
It is one of a kind and cannot be duplicated.
瞧见没
See?
写着呢 "不可复♥制♥"
"Do Not Duplicate."
只有我能碰这把钥匙
Only I touch this key.
那这个钥匙链有啥牛叉闪闪的背景
And what's the significance of the keychain?
没有我是个青蛙控而已
Nothing, I just like frogs. I'm a frog guy.
你想回来时务必确保身边没人
When you need to get back here, make sure you're alone.
按下这个按钮就行了
Press this button.
有问题吗没有很好
Any questions? No? Great.
好走不送
Knock yourself out.
抱歉但这会儿非常重要...
I-I'm sorry, but this is an important moment--
-往右靠 -天呐能不能看看路
- On your right, mate! - Jeez, watch it, man!
下来给我落到凡间来
Come down! Come down where you belong.
早上好[意大利语]Buongiorno. Buongiorno.
我刚刚去了地球耶
I was just on Earth.
真是太赞了
It was incredible.
车水马龙就连鸽子都好可爱
The--the traffic, the pigeons.
而且有个地方既有必胜客又有塔可钟
And I saw this place that was, at once, a Pizza Hut and a Taco Bell!
真是大开眼界
I mean... The mind reels.
既有必胜客又有塔可钟
A Pizza Hut and a Taco Bell!
善地
第三季第一集
珍妮特简直和我想象中一毛一样
Janet, it was everything I ever imagined.
我骑了自行车
I got to ride a bike.
还往一个机器里投了币买♥♥了一块口香糖
I put a coin in a thing and got a gumball.
还有人主动跟我搭话
And then someone came up to me and said,
他说 "天儿真热啊" 你猜我怎么回的
"Hot enough for ya?" And you know what I said?
我回他 "可不是咋地"
I said, "Tell me about it."
好棒啊你还嚼到了口香糖
Well, I am glad that you got to chew a gumball.
我去
Damn.
我没嚼就吞下去了失策了哎呀呀
I didn't even think to chew it. Missed opportunity, shoot.
你把他们救回来了吗
Did you also save their lives?
当然啦大家都没事
Yes, of course. Everyone is safe.
杰森也活蹦乱跳
Including Jason.
我们只管坐等他们弃恶从善吧
Now we just sit back and watch as they become better people.
几个月后
脑子有病才会当好人你做这些能得到什么好处
Being good is for suckers. What do you even get out of it?
我不干了吃屁吧瘦小版"卷福"
I quit. Eat my farts, Benedict Cumberbatch.
奇迪
早上好奇迪来个蓝莓松饼吗
Morning, Chidi. Blueberry muffin for ya?
让我想想我有选择困难
I don't know, maybe. I can't decide.
-你没事吧 -我选好了
- You all right there, mate? - Okay, I've made my decision.
我想要...
I want to...
大哭一场
start crying.
塔哈妮
塔哈妮·阿贾米尔
Hey, Tahani Al-Jamil.
我是"国际名流杂♥志♥"的记者
I'm from "International Sophisticate Magazine."
能问你582个问题吗
Mind if we ask you 582 questions?
塔哈妮·阿贾米尔之582问
-我的荣幸 -这是哪里呀
- Sounds delightful. - Where are we, exactly?
塔哈妮故意拽法语
我临时落脚的地方巴塞罗那的海景房♥
My pied-a-terre, just off the coast of "Barthelona."
你有什么不为人知的一面
What's one thing people don't know about you?
我高中时是个野丫头
That I was such a tomboy in high school.
-你瞧 -不错啊
- See? - Looking good.
下一个问题
Okay, next question.
你手♥机♥通讯录中最有名的人是谁
Who would you say is the most famous person in your phone?
认识谁不重要
It's not about who you know.
启蒙源于自身
Enlightenment comes from within.
达♥赖♥喇♥嘛♥发短♥信♥告诉我的
The Dalai Lama texted me that.
杰森
K 你愿意成全我
K, will you make me the happiest man in the world,
做我的妻子吗
and agree to be my wife?
不要
No.
K·拉米雷斯
你真觉得我叫"K"吗
Do you think my name is the letter K?
你就答应吧
Just say yes.
如果你嫁给我按说就不能逮捕我了
If we're married, legally you can't arrest me.
而且我偷的东西还可以分你一半
Plus, bonus--you get half the stuff I stole.
搞定他刚承认抢劫了
Yep, he just confessed to the robbery.
该死
Damn it.
你看出问题所在了吧
You realize what the problem is, right?
嗯但我们也帮不上忙
Yes, but there's no way to help.
也许可以
Maybe there is.
他们在死后世界都变好了
In the afterlife, they all got better
是因为大家互相帮助
because they helped each other.
而要实现这一点就得让奇迪和埃莉诺相遇
And the key to that was Chidi and Eleanor's connection.
如果我能让他们俩相遇
If I get the two of them together,
-事情就水到渠成了 -迈克尔不行
- everything else will follow. - Michael, no.
我得去地球偶遇一下埃莉诺
I'm going to meet Eleanor someplace
暗示她去找奇迪
and plant the idea in her mind that she needs to find Chidi.
然后再去见见奇迪
and then maybe I'll visit Chidi
确保埃莉诺出现时他会给予帮助
and make sure that he helps her when she shows up.
我就是去帮他们一把
I'm just going to nudge the two of them together.
就小小地推一把
Just nudge-y nudge nudge.
法官当初说得很明确
The Judge was pretty clear in her instructions,
而且她可是对宇宙之事了如指掌
and the Judge is, you know, the Judge of, you know, the universe.
不会被她察觉的
She'll never find out.
她一直在办公室刷剧呢
She spends all her time in her chambers bingeing TV shows.
她正在追《海军罪案调查处》
She's watching all of "NCIS" right now.
你好啊
Hey, there.
-我得去地球一趟 -通关文书
- Need to head on back to Earth. - Travel papers.
给你法官说用之前那个就行
Yeah. You know, the Judge said to use the same ones.
因为还是去帮同一拨人
Because I'm, you know, visiting the same people.
差点忘了