♪ 我好爱你 ♪
♪ I'm in love with you ♪
♪ 快来爱我 ♪
♪ Want you to love me too ♪
上周五
♪ 真爱难寻 ♪
♪ True love can be hard to find ♪
♪ 真爱难寻 ♪
♪ True love can be hard to find ♪
♪ 我爱你啊 ♪
♪ I'm in love with you... ♪
你好
Hi!
你好
Hi.
-你叫什么名字 -我觉得我
- What's your name? - I thought I-
-什么 -你先说吧
- What? - No, you go.
不好意思 你刚刚说什么
Sorry what was it you said?
你跟谁出来的
Who are you out with?
我的室友 他在那
My housemate. He's over there.
你叫什么
What's your name?
-瑞安 -不会吧
- Ryan. - No way.
我养过一只兔子也叫瑞安
I had a rabbit called Ryan.
真的吗 现在呢
Cool. How is he?
它死了
Oh, dead.
-那就行 -啥
- Good. - What?
那就只有一个瑞安了
There can only be one of us.
-你叫什么 -劳拉
- What's your name? - Laura.
我以前老是说 我要是生个女儿
I always said if I had a daughter...
你就给她取名叫劳拉嘛
You'd call her Laura?
那倒没有
Well no,
我会觉得我又少了一个
I'd probably call her "Yet another, in a long line
可以泡的女孩
of women that I cannot have sex with."
不好意思 那个 只是个笑话
Sorry that-that was a joke.
我没有女儿
I don't have a daughter, so,
而且我对乱♥伦♥和恋童也没啥兴趣
even if I did, I'm not an incestuous pedophile.
我的天啊 不敢相信她又抛下我走了
Oh, my God, can't believe this, she's left.
她老是这么做
She always does this.
想来一杯吗
Do you want a drink?
我 我应该得去找她了
Uh, I- I, should, I should probably go after her.
而且她可能又去了他家
Then again, she'll have gone to his house and...
-所以那就是 -好的
- So was that... - Yes.
没错 给我来一杯玛丽泰
Yeah. I'll have a shot of Tia Maria.
一种咖啡利口酒
那好 能给我们来杯玛丽泰
Great. Hi, can we please have a shot of Tia Maria
和一杯啤酒吗
and a beer please.
你怎么不和我一起喝玛丽泰
Why don't you try Tia Maria with me?
当然可以 那给我们来两杯玛丽泰吧
Sure, and can I have two shots of Tia Maria, please.
我说服他了
I'm converting him.
玛丽泰万岁
The church of Tia Maria, all hail.
-没那么好喝 -这样吗
- It's not that good. - Oh.
女性通常认为伴侣的幽默感
Women often rate a good sense of humor as more important
比肉体上的吸引力更重要
to them in a partner than physical attractiveness.
幽默感显示了一个男人应对潜在压力
A sense of humor implies a man's ability to cope with
甚至是应对危险的能力
potentially stressful or even dangerous situations.
化妆是主动提高我们吸引力最主要的一步
Makeup is used primarily to artificially enlarge our features.
大眼和厚唇都是年轻的象征
Big eyes and slips are indicators of youth.
女人越年轻就可能越能生
The younger the woman the more fertile she's likely to be
她的身体也会越有能力
and the more capable her body is of nurturing
养育后代
and providing for her offspring.
在亲吻时唾液中蕴含的DNA
The DNA contained within saliva and exchanged
进行了交换 它能给我们庞大的信息
through a kiss gives us invaluable
让我们了解到彼此的基因是否相契合
information regarding our genetic compatibility.
天生的黄色头发是雌性激素含量高的结果
Natural blonde hair is the result of high estrogen levels.
染黄头发就是模仿这种高水平的生育能力
Dying hair blonde imitates increased levels of fertility
也给男性为什么更喜欢黄头发
and offers scientific reasoning
提供了更科学的依据
to the claim that men prefer blondes.
女性的嘴唇是对生殖器官的暗示
A woman's lips offer a subconscious representation
如果一个女人被燃起了性♥欲♥
of female genitalia. When a woman is aroused
她的生殖器官会变成深红色
her genitals become deep red,
涂艳丽的红色唇膏
wearing red glossy lipstick
就是在下意识模仿这一过程
is an unconscious attempt to mimic this process.
人类需要性
The human race depends upon sex.
我们需要尽我们所能找到伴侣
We need to do everything we can to ensure we attract a mate,
不是是个人都行 要找到最好的
not just any mate, but the best we can get...
为了达到这一点 我们需要自我提高
-...to do this we need to enhance ourselves
有很多方法可以达到这一点
and there are many ways we can do this.
在脸上喷满定妆喷雾
Spray a finishing spritz across your face
来定型 就万事大吉了
to set the look, and you're done!
什么
What?
本周的节目就是这样了 伙计们
That's it for this week, guys.
喜欢这支视频的话点一下喜欢和关注哦
Remember to hit "like" if you like the video and subscribe...
-去她妈的 -加入粉丝大家庭吧
- Fuck's sake. - ...to become part of the glam fans.
现在
♪ 你说如果你给我看你的 ♪
♪ You say I will show you mine ♪
♪ 我就给你看我的 ♪
♪ If you will show me yours ♪
♪ 我们一件接着一件 ♪
♪ And one by one we're throwing ♪
♪ 褪去身上的衣装 ♪
♪ All our clothing On the floor ♪
♪ 你说不用关上灯 ♪
♪ You say don't blow out the candles ♪
♪ 因为我想要你 ♪
♪ Cause I want you to... ♪
真是美到家了
Absolutely gorgeous.
是你说他很会穿衣服的
Well, you said he was a smart dresser.
但也没那么做作
Yeah, not a Victorian.
第二次约会就能确定这段关系是死是活了
Second dates are what makes or breaks a relationship.
-谁说得 -油管博主说的
- Says who? - Says the fella on the YouTubes.
对了 别今晚就把自己全盘托出 知道吗
Oh, don't go giving yourself away tonight though. All right?
男人喜欢追逐 你给的越少他们要的越多
Men like the chase, the less you give the more they want.
我不想你犯我遇见你♥爸♥爸时犯的错
I don't want you making the same mistake I did with your father.
-瓦尔 你每个字我都听得到 -臭老头子
- I can bloody hear you, Val. - Oh, fuck off.
你穿那个夹克挺好看的
You looked lovely in that jacket.
出去吧你
Just get out.
你怎么穿着我的衬衫
Why are you wearing my shirt?
因为我需要穿衬衫 瑞安
Because I needed a shirt, Ryan.
不 我才需要 劳拉要来了
No, I need the shirt. Laura's coming around.
那你就更不需要了 不是吗
Then you don't need a shirt, do you?
反正最后都得脱掉
because you're gonna be naked.
-我们要去吃印度菜 -光着去呗
- We're going for an Indian. - In the Indian naked.
-快把衬衫给我 -等你回来就给你
- Just give me the shirt. - Right will you back a-way-
你能不能别像个娘们儿似的围着毛巾
Will you stop wearing that towel like a girl, please?
我还以为她会到这来
I thought she was coming here.
她确实会来
She is, and we're
而且我们也真的要去吃印度菜
going for an Indian.
人家穿过一整个镇子
She's not travelling
不是就为了一盘
all the way across town for
洋葱煎饼的 对吧
an "onion bhaji", is she?
她来这里就为了一件事
She's come here for one thing and one thing only.
我可不觉得她来这是为了干这个
Yeah, I don't think that's why she's coming.
-你的大鸟 -我看得懂
- Cock. - I understood,
但是生活不止眼前的性♥爱♥
it's more than sex it's more than...
-瑞安 你为什么不做♥爱♥ -我做 我做过
- Why don't you have sex, Ryan? - I do have sex, I've done sex.
是啊 跟簇簇做 你真棒
Yeah with Tufts, brilliant.
还有洁丝
Yeah, and Jess.
还记得大学的洁丝吗
Remember Jess from college?
就这 就俩女的吗
Is that it? Just two girls?
你就跟这么多女的做过吗
That's all you've had sex with.
但是我是谈恋爱的
But I was in a relationship,
长♥期♥稳定的恋爱
a long-term relationship.
怪不得你现在还喜欢她
No wonder you're still in love with her.
-喜欢谁 -簇簇
- Who? - Tufts.
我不再喜欢她了
I don't still love her.
你上次跟她发消息是什么时候
When was the last time you texted her?
-我想想 星期五吧 -天啊
-Uh, I don't- Friday? - Oh, man.
我已经一个星期没发消息了
I've not texted in a week,
已经一个星期了 都结束了
it's been a week, it's finished.
是啊 两年前她在别人的大鸟上
Yeah, two years ago when she was jumping
手舞足蹈的时候你也是这么说的
on somebody else's dick.
-向前看吧 伙计 -我向前了 跟劳拉
- Move on man. - I have. I am. With Laura.
修理你的小花♥园♥了吗
Weeded the garden yet?
-不 我今晚不会跟他睡的 -快去