-那有点恐怖 -别再吓我了
- that's a little scary. - stop trying to wear me out.
知道吗 我觉得你对"跟踪者"一点都不敏感
I think-you know, you have a real hang-up with the term "stalker."
不 我只是没留意你每天在我博物馆里出现
No, l just fail to see how you showing up at my museum evey day...
大约两周吧 我一直都被人跟踪着
For, like, two weeks makes me the stalker...
现在明白那个人就是你
When clearly it makes you the stalker.
最重要的是 记住 把手伸给我
The most important thing to remember here- hand, please.
这过去的两个月...
These past two months...
是你这一生当中
Have really, truly been the happiest two months...
最快乐的两个月
- of your life. -
-我爱你 -我也爱你 -给
- l love you. - love you too. - there you go.
等等 对不起 王八蛋
W-wait. excuse me. son of bitch.
我一直和他说别加橄榄
I keep telling this guy no olives...
他还老是加橄榄 这是个问题 因为
And he keeps bringing me olives, and that's a problem because-
-你不喜欢橄榄 -我讨厌橄榄 我讨厌橄榄
-you hate olives. - l hate olives! l hate olives.
别动 我来搞定
Don't move. l'm on it.
看 危机解除了
There. crisis averted.
知道吗 通常我会觉得很恶心
You know, usually l would be completely disgusted...
要是有人把手指伸进我的饮料里 不过对于你
With someone sticking their fingers into my drink, but with you,
就另当别论
not so much.
实际上 还在里面融入了梅林达的味道
In fact, it, uh- mmm. it adds a certain melinda ''zestiness'' to it.
这么说 我们还真是天造地设的一对啊
Well, we make a good team.
确实如此
Yes, we do.
我去下洗手间
Well, l am going to go powder my nose.
帮个忙 要是服务生过来
Oh. do me a favor- if the waiter comes back...
你千万别让他在我蛋糕里再加橄榄
Would you make sure there are no olives in my cake?
我喜欢这样
I like that.
思朋斯 思朋斯 好了 兄弟 是时候了
Spence! Spence. all right, man, it's time.
-什么时候 -我要求婚了
- time for what? - it's time for me to get engaged.
记得吗 你把这个放在她的圣代里
You were gonna put this in her sundae, remember?
-哦 对 钻石真漂亮
- oh, yeah. right. nice rock.
-谢谢
Oh. thanks.
伙计
Oh, boy.
不好意思 我的鼻子堵住了
Oh. sorry. it was packed.
我不得不对着镜子折腾了好久
l just had to fight for a mirror.
来了 圣代是这位先生的
Here we are. a sundae for the gentleman.
巧克力蛋糕是这位女士的
And chocolate cake for the lady.
实际上 我觉得是她点了圣代 我要了蛋糕
Actually, l think that she had the sundae and l had the cake.
哦 对
Oh, okay, yeah. got it.
那么 梅尔
So, Mel...
我很高兴你能和我在一起
I'm glad you stalked me...
因为...
cause, um...
以前我从未遇见像你这样的...
I never met anyone like you before...
虽然我 我知道...
And l, uh- l know that...
我们才约会不久 但...
We've only been dating a little while, but...
我就觉得 我从一出生
I just feel like l have known you my-
就已经认识你了
My-my whole- my whole life.
你嚼了吗
Are you chewing that?
哦 我的天哪 上帝啊
Oh, my god! praise Jesus!
上帝啊 加尔文 我知道是你做的
Praise Jesus! oh, Calvin! l knew you'd do it.
稍等一下 把那个给我
Excuse me one second.Just wanna take that-
我要找个东西
Just a little quick search for something.
等一下 我马上回来
All right. be right back.
-我要给我妈打个电♥话♥ -你好
-I'm calling mama. - hi. hi.
-对不起 我觉得有点小误会 -妈妈
- l'm sorry. l think there's been a mistake. - mama!
我马上要结婚了 妈妈
I'm getting married, mama.
-女士 女士 -不好意思 那戒指是我的
Ma'am? ma'am? pardon me. pardon me. that's my ring.
稍等 妈妈
Hang on, mama.
有什么事吗
May l help you?
是的
Yes.
很抱歉 我觉得服务生
L'm so sory, but l think the waiter...
给你的圣代拿错了
Mistakenly brought you the wrong sundae.
你瞧 那是我奶奶的戒指
You see, that-that's my grandmother's ring.
我建议你最好在我未婚夫没发飙之前
I think you better go sit over there before my fiance? here...
滚回自己的座位去
'whups' your ass.
要不这样 你们晚餐算我请 如何
Okay, how about l buy both of your dinners?
好吗 好 不过我得先把那个拿回来
Good? yes. except l'm gonna need that back though, so-
宝贝 揍他
okay, baby, ''whup'' his ass!
-宝贝 这东西是 -这东西...
- uh, baby, the thing is- - the thing is...
是我等了17年而你没给我的东西
I haven't waited 17 years on your sorry ass...
别让这个白种垃圾破坏了我的订婚仪式
To let this white shadow come and spoil my engagement.
加尔文 要是你不揍这小子
It's either you whup his ass, Calvin...
我就揍你
Or l'll whup yours.
没错 你马上给我离开
Yeah. you need to go now.
-好吧 -妈妈 是的
- right. - mama? yes!
这样 不如
Ok，Um, how about-
戒指很漂亮 来人啊 抓贼啊
It's beautiful. Theif，they help!
把戒指还给我
give me my ring!
把戒指还给我
Give me my ring!
我没想到会变成这样
Well, this wasn't exactly what l had planned.
听着 我们在一起时间不长...
Look. l know we haven't been together long...
但你知道当真爱来临时
But you know when something just feels right...
你总是希望它一直到天长地久
And you don't want that feeling to end?
行了 罗密欧 留着对你狱友讲吧
Okay, Romeo, save it for your cell mate.
等下 克莱希 让他说完
Whoa. Clancy. give the kid a minute.
-多谢 -没关系
-thank you. - no problem.
长话短说 我爱你
Long story short. l love you.
-我也爱你 -你愿意
- l love you. - will, uh-
你愿意
Will you, uh-
-愿意嫁给我吗 -是的 我愿意
- will you marry me? - yes, l will marry you.
行了 恭喜你们
Okay. congrats and all that.
你有权保持沉默
You have the right to remain silent.
但你所说一切都将成为呈堂证供
Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.
我得走了
I'm gonna go now.
伙计 你要和我过不去吗
Dude, are you fuckin' with me?
德里克 用"恭喜"来回答比较恰当
Congratulations'' might be the more appropriate response here, Derek.
你才和她约会了两个月
You've only dated her for two months.
我这唇疱疹还得了不止两个月呢
I've had this cold sore longer than that.
这就是一个结过三次婚的男人的经验吗
This coming from a guy who's been married three times.
兄弟 你就没能从我身上吸取教训吗
Have you learned nothing from me, man?
我可是前车之鉴
I am a cautionary tale.
我是耶稣 我替你承担你的罪过
I am Jesus. l have suffered for your sins.
希望只是放屁
please let that be a fart.
耶 宝贝 看到了吧 窝囊废
Yeah, baby! suck it, losers.
显然不只是在放屁
Okay.that was definitely not a fart.
你知道
You know,
那"婊♥子♥"喂这小东西印度料理纯粹是要整我
l think that ''biatch'' is feeding this thing indian food just to screw with me.
你还真拉屎了
Yeah, you did a poop.
要我帮你们也换换吗
Any of you need changing?
-塞思在哪儿 他来了吗
-Hey, where's, uh，where's Seth? he's up.
他忙着找球 没时间回去拿自己的球
He's looking for a ball. didn't have time to stop at home and get his.
这是保龄球馆 找个球有那么难吗
We're in a bowling alley. how hard is it to find a ball?
好的 我来了
All right! I'll take it!
抱歉 伙计们 今晚我进伤病名单
Sorry, fellas. l'm on the d.l. tonight.
伙计 保龄球比赛好像没有伤病名单的
I don't think there's a disabled list for rec league bowling, buddy.
罗恩 你怎么能把我丢给这两个失败者呢
Ron, how can you abandon me with these two losers?
我没有丢弃谁
I'm not abandoning anybody.
我结婚并不意味着我以后就不来这
Just 'cause l'm getting married doesn't mean l'm not gonna be here for
参加保龄球赛
bowling night...
周末钓鱼 或詹森一年两次的色情杂♥志♥展
Or fishing weekend or jason's biannual ''porno palooza.''
你知道 什么都不会变
You know, nothing's gonna change.
是的 我也是这么想的
Yeah. well, that's what l thought.
先失陪了 我去拿个机器
Now if you'll excuse me, l gotta get little shit machine...
回他该死的妈妈那儿去
Back to his gold-digging whore of a mother, huh?
别忘了把自己的球带走啊
Hey, don't forget your ball.
我正和市长商量...
I was talking with the mayor...
并告诉他把招待会放在剧场举♥行♥
And l put a bug in his ear about having the reception at the opera house.
你知道 妈妈 我们想搞个简单的婚礼
You know, mom, we were thinking of having a small, simple wedding.
坦白说 梅林达
Honestly, Melinda.
我们不是严紧派教♥徒♥
We're not Amish.
我去开门
l'll get it.