美剧 | 糟糕历史（2009） | 导航列表
*Terrible Tudors, gorgeous Georgians
*Slimy Stuarts, vile Victorians
*Woeful wars, ferocious fights
*Dingy castles, daring knights
*Horrors that defy description
*Cut-throat Celts, awful Egyptians
凶残维京 冷血罪行 远古的惩罚*
*Vicious Vikings, cruel crimes, punishment from ancient times
*Romans, rotten, rank, and ruthless
*Caveman, savage, fierce and toothless
*Groovy Greeks, brainy sages
*Mean and measly Middle Ages
*Gory stories we do that
*And your host a talking rat
*The past is no longer a mystery
You might think going to a Roman Emperor's dinner party
would be fun.
Well, think again.
四个罗马人 四场宴会 四百道佳肴
Four Romans, four banquets, 400 courses!
Yes, it's Roman Come Dine With Me.
And tonight it's teenage emperor Elagabalus's turn
to cook for his guests.
But the young emperor's reputation
has some of his guests nervous before they even arrive.
I'm a bit scared to be honest.
Apparently Elagabalus is a bit crazy.
A friend of mine was invited to one of his feasts
and he made them eat live parrots.
Imagine trying to swallow all those feathers!
It'd make you sick as a parrot.
So how is the potty prankster
planning to impress his guests tonight?
Well, tonight I thought I'd just do something really easy.
It's easy because I'm not making it,
my slaves are.
What are you cooking?
Well, I'm going to do camels feet with scooped out flamingo brain
and, er, some nice stuffed snails.
Then we've got the sows udders, the jellyfish...
I'm going to do dormouse which is rolled in...
..Jackdaws, I've got horse-meat sausages,
and rotten fish guts,
and, of course, peas! With little nuggets of gold.
That sounds like a really nice starter, what's the main?
Agrippina is the first to arrive
and there's a shock in store.
Don't tread in those.
Those are the guts of some people I had sacrificed earlier.
They're to tell the future.
And the guts say...
my pudding is going to be so scrummy
you won't literally believe it.
Elagabalus goes to check on the food,
while the rest of his guests have a snoop round the palace.
I wonder what's in here.
No, no, no, please don't go in there.
Come on, it can't be that bad.
- Lion! - There's a lion in here!
I hid a lion in there.
The guests who survived the lion join their host for dinner.
That's rock hard.
That's because it is rock.
I gave you both bits of wax and stone that are made to look like food
while I get the real food
which is actually really nice.
How mad am I? How mad am I?
Time for some scores.
Well, I slipped on human guts,
I was attacked by a lion and I was forced to eat rocks.
So I'm going to give him a two out of...
If you give me a bad score I'll have you executed, so...
- So I'm going to give him X out of X. - Sweet!
And I got you a doggy bag because I'm so generous.
- Thank you. - It's an actual dead dog!
I'm so random.
Stay in touch, yeah?
That's 100% accu-rat.
Elagabalus really was one extreme prankster.
I mean, hiding lions around the house.
What's wrong with good old itching powder and whoopee cushions?
That wasn't me!
That was Marcus my pet flea.
He's like an all-in-one itching powder and whoopee cushion.
天啊 马库斯 我很抱歉
Oh, Marcus! I do apologise.
Walsingham? What happened to you?
The Queen threw a slipper at me...again!
What did you do this time?
I told her she had a short temper.
You idiot! You know that makes her angry.
I know. Have you finished her portrait yet?
Mmm...it's getting there, but I'm petrified.
What if she doesn't like it?
Better hope she's in a good mood.
- Is she ever? - No.
Where's my portrait!
Oh, I can't look!
鼻子硕大 一嘴烂牙 满脸是疤
The hideous nose, rotten teeth and pock-marked skin.
Have that man relieved of the burden of his head.
Ma'am, you're looking into a mirror.
This is the portrait.
Why, however did you manage to capture my good looks?
Well, my lady,I just did an exact copy
of the only portrait you've ever liked.
As per your orders.
Splendid. Do me another.
And see if you can capture my regal beauty again.
I think it looks nothing like her.
I heard that.
As well as art,
Queen Elizabeth loved plays by Shakespeare,
especially one called Titus Andronicus...
in which Roman Emperor Titus serves up an unusual pie
to one unfortunate woman.
美剧 | 糟糕历史（2009） | 导航列表
|金爆行动（2023） Operation Fortune: Rue de guerre|
|路德：落日之殇（2023） Luther: The Fallen Sun|
|或许我愿意（2023） Maybe I Do|
|魔术师的大象（2023） The Magician's Elephant|
|逐梦大海（2023） True Spirit|
|生无可恋的奥托（2022） A Man Called Otto|
|换屋假期（2023） Your Place Or Mine|
|蚁人与黄蜂女：量子狂潮（2023） Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania|